The Nut House

We get woken up at 7:45 and breakfast is at 8:15. I lie in bed for as long as I can before I get up and sluggishly walk towards the caf. I stand in line behind the other crazy patients and pick out an apple. I walk towards the corner table and sit down. I watch everyone as they eat cereal, fruit, oatmeal and toast. I think that's more calories than I eat in a week. I take about 20 minutes to eat half my apple. I get up and throw it in the garbage and head towards one of the empty bathrooms.
Once I'm inside and the door is locked behind me, I start to strip in front of the mirror. I hate everything about myself. My eyes are so dark you can't tell the difference between my pupil and my iris. My hair is long and black, like a security blanket. When I smile you can see some gum because my smile is crooked. I lightly trace my collarbone with my fingers. Doing that has always helped me calm down when I feel stressed or depressed or something. I don't know why but I've always liked the feeling and look of bones on a body. You can see the outline of ribs but you can't quite count them all yet. I'm hoping that by reducing my daily calorie intake to 500 instead of 800 my ribs will be more visible. I can sort of feel my hip bones but they're the most prominent when I'm lying down on my back. I can wrap one arm all the way around my body and touch my belly button. I can wrap both of my hands around my mid-thigh. I look fat and disgusting.
After I'm done in the bathroom I walk to the rocking chair I was in last night. People are slowly coming out of their rooms or the bathroom but nobody looks ready to start the day. I have to say - I'm pretty nervous because I don't know what to expect for today. One of the nurses calls everyone over to the big round table in the middle of the room.
"Since you're not allowed to go to your regular schools, we have classes here that will still allow you to finish your year. Yes, it might be something completely different than what you were being taught, or you might have even done these before. Here is your teacher, Mrs. Belanger."
A middle aged woman stands up and waves. She has light brown eyes and short brown hair. Nothing too spectacular about her.
"Alright everyone, let's get started"


...........


It's now 3 hours later and almost time for lunch. I'm in grade 11 and we were doing stuff from grade 10. Pretty sure I'm gonna get a decent grade. I get in line behind Dianna but she doesn't see me. I grab a tray and take a plate of whatever calorie filled garbage they're feeding us today. I take a water and go sit in the corner just like always. Dianna is sitting with some other people a couple of tables away from me. A tall girl with medium length bright red hair sits down next to me. She's so pretty it's almost intimidating. She has eyes as green as an emerald.
"Hi, my names Madelaine but people just call me Maddie."
"I'm Debbie, nice to meet you. I like your hair."
"Thank you! If you want, I can dye your hair this weekend when the nurses let us do a 'beauty salon' type thing."
"I'll think about it. Thanks for the offer." I stare down at my plate. A grilled cheese with fries on the side and some sort of soup thing. I cut 2 fries into impossibly small pieces and slowly start eating. To make myself feel fuller, I like to take a sip of water in between each bite and chew the hell out of my food. While I'm eating, I play around with the other fries to make it look like I ate something. After I've finished the 2 cut up fries I move on to the soup. I move my spoon around and I'm seeing a lot of vegetables. I don't know what kind it is so I'm not going to eat it. I'm just going to eat the broth.
"Do you want to sit with me for the rest of the class? There's only 3 more hours left."
I forgot she was sitting there for a moment, I was so wrapped up in my food obsession. "Sure. I'll see you there."


..........


After another 3 long hours class is finally over. We have 2 hours to do whatever we want. Well, not exactly 'whatever' we want. There's a lot of boring rules here. No touching, no yelling, no this no that no anything. All we have is TV, puzzles, books or to stay in our rooms. They don't really like when we stay in our rooms, they'll always come in and check on us. Doors are always open unless you're sleeping, even then the door is open a little bit. The night nurses check on us every half hour and that can get very annoying.
Anyway, enough with the rules. I go and sit at the table where Dianna and I left the puzzle last night. The border is done and now it's time for the hard part. I start looking through the pieces and I'm slowly finding some that fit together. I'm so into this puzzle that I hardly notice Dianna sitting next to me until I see another hand reaching for a bright yellow piece in front of me.
"You startled me, I didn't notice you were there."
"Haha, I know. I was watching TV and I seen you sitting here all alone. It looks like you kind of need a friend." I can see that she truly does care by the way she looks at me with her piercing brown eyes.
"I'm fine, just in my own world. Thanks though." I've never had a friend before, it's always been just me, myself and I.
"Oh.. Alright. Is it okay if I sit here with you for awhile?"
"Of course."
We talk for what seems like hours about everything and nothing at all. We hear one of the nurses calling everyone back to the big circular table. Time for an hour of group therapy. Great. Kill me now.