It Was Green!

"My zucchini has a first name.
It's M-O-N-S-T-E-R.
"My zucchini has a last name.
It's P-I-C-K-L-E..."

So goes the commercial I might expect to write,
that sounds like sliced meat from years gone by,
but it doesn't really kick unless you like a big green foot.

Back to the drawing board I must quickly hie,
to advertise zucchini, way up into the sky
but that doesn't fit. So far, but I think so nigh.

"Dear, Momma, please don't make me eat,
what might eat me back today!"
"I sliced it small. It's not a feat.
Just a zucchini pickle I'd say."

Yes, better far, but I still don't know
how to zucchinis sell
As a truck-sized vegetable I learned to grow
or a tale I learned to tell.

Do I describe this zucchini as
the Giant Pickle that Larry, the Cucumber fought?
Could it be as Everest
climbed by a professor who taught?

"O casserole! O casserole!
How large thy kingly green!
"The biggest dish for Christmas time
the world has ever seen!"

Just sing it to "O, Tannenbaum!"
all sliced as stately tree
And sip some tea to remain calm
as from the quest you're free.

So was it big the task at hand
or the zucchini on my plate?
I know it not for by my plan,
'twas in hunger that I ate.

It was so big this poem write
that words hard-sought were finally seen
And by my trow 'twas crisply tight
for I'm zucchini green!

by Jay O'Toole
on July 17, 2016 at 10:45 PM, EDT
250 words
36 lines