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Rated: GC · Book · Comedy · #2086671
Some joke I made up over the years pomes and short stories .
Jokes And Tastess short stories
June 8, 2016 at 3:31pm
June 8, 2016 at 3:31pm
#884166
e An 18 year old goes to prison he was set up by the cops because his father name is Ray hes A retired Police Officer then became cheif detective for the Narcotics squad In New York City would not get involved with the mafia .Because he hate his brother and Used to be a good cop until he got shot on duty and now collecting disability and A socil security that harldy pays the bills.Needs A walker to walk around in .

His brother is big big kingpin in the Mafia.Theyhate each other and each other f .And have nothing to do which each other for 7 years and aways had there scrobbles over everthing named under the sun. .

The kid that was setup and starting Is time tommorrw to Is Joey John but everone in his family calls hims J J.He weight 145 pounds 5'8.He never got in trouble with the law but hes been smoking cigarettes and Pot since 15 but never really got into trouble his older Brother M j since who always got in trouble with the law .Since he was 11.


His bother name is Michael John .Hes 4 years older He hate cops and hates his father for being one but he expessly hates his father for being a good clean cop and admires His uncle Joey Michael John eveyone calls him Mj hes been smoking 5 years old pot at 8 and started doing nicket and dime deling 2 dollar jonits aroundjMiddle school since he was 14.
Started to dealing ounces weed and eight balls of Coke 16 to 18 years old and hiding from his father but confided in Unlce Tony

He was always get arrested or suppended from school he would call up his uncle Tony to get out a fix to pretened that he was his father sweet talk undersexed overaged female housmaster or Pricipal a or post bail years later when he got into bigger beefs with the law and and now leagle age of Majority.At 18 He left his father to join Tony and his aunt Kitty.To help with the undground drug network



has been introuble with the law since he was 14 he left home at 17 and dropped out of school He disowned his father and brother j j.He always admired Tony and his money and hated his father for going by the book because many time expessally after the acident .Ray Jj and MJ did not have much money were on food stamps and social security .And Tony would vist some years back or so ago stop by on holidy and Kids birthdays It was chistmas 7 years ago the last time Uncle Tony visited Ray Marco house .

he now luientenant in Tony Family business major distribitor Pot Coke and heroin of Manhattan and Queens and
Brooklyn and half of Connetuct and Most of Long Island Mj loves pot and coke never did herion .He yell I fucking love this shit he yell so much when he smoked Pot or snorted coke I love this fucking shit so so so fucking much !!But I hate fucking needles !!I hate fucking needles .I rather the devil stick up a molten hot iron ore up in Hell for till time a great great great eturnity.Then A nurse or Dr. or some sleezy junky shoot me up with a fucking needle .He has not seen a Dr in 8years .

His first day in Jail was not bad he was still in holding not yet sent to state prison to the rest of the population

.Tony the mafia Kingpin went visit J J..J.J

Hi Kid what are you doing here!
I hate you and my father hates you!You Fucker
Tony said J J that what you father calls you I know me and your father had some squbbble and not talked to your father in 20 years that are beef it doest have to be ours .If you joing me and my nefew dear bloved M J in the family business. I will set up a miss trial .The Judge and Jury prosicuter are im in there pockets .Will be out in 24 hours eating prime rib at my manchin with me and wife gorgous wife Kitty and M J.Well just call this a minor dircrepence that had nothing really to do with you you got cought in the middle no harm no foul .

J J spit at him and said screamed no never he just missed but except for tiny spital that went on his 5 thouand dollar sport coat bought by his wife when they were on there 15 Wedding annervery in Rio

hate you and your Stupid Ugly whore wife and my fucking retarded jail bird brother .My father used to get his dick suck every night by your whore wife when you got dafted to Nam
Sucker!!!

Tony was so mad hes was shaking ok ok kid you get yours ejoy the next 30 years in the state penn enjoy your gonna be there a long time I pay off the warden and the parol bord there in my pocket Too.So you will never get ou till the day you die .Your no good father will pay for this and I gonna hurt him by huring the thing he loves the most that you J J

I knew your gonna do this kid !I knew you were gonna do this youll get your kid youll get yours .Ill get back at your father What Tony wants tony gets for your no good father my taking a advantage of presous Kitty while I was defending are coutry nam.

One last chance kid if you dont and see it my way and never see of day I can be reasonalble never or you can never see seelight of day .If see things my my join the family .

I will have you out in 24 hours youll be by the pool a two diffent young gorgous babes every night on each arm topless wareing nothing but but A tight tight tong wrapped around her tight tight little ass to do one do anything you want with them.For one night or manny many nights.
Sitting by the pool drinkng the finesest champange in the world and Smoking the Best Sanceimillia and Best Tighe in all of the east coast in and eating pee King Duck from the finest gormet Chinese Food of all of upper tri-States .
Well what about it kid or j j



J J scremed fuck you you mother flucker and spit A loogy at him It bearly missed again.
When I was over your house as a teenager I fucked your Wifeshe was taking a shower and I wrapped A towel over your head hi hony I back from busiseess for A half Then back to a busness meeeting and agin Your Big Man Toe Toe.Just coming over for a quicky .
When I was fulking from behind know what she said uncle Tony!!
Oh Toe Toe this is your pretty pussy kittens this is the best have been ever And feels like you grew! Dont stop please dont stop .OH TOE Teo the moves!You got the moves dont stop the moves !This is my first orgasm in 20 years since I Cheated on you with your brother !Oh Tony that just sliped out forget I said that .Me and your brother had affair while you in Nam.I was very very lonely and used to call him then we go out for coffee then for dinner then one thing lead to another .And finnly one night while watching the men go to the moon we went out for a smoke for look for there Apollo rocket on the porch .
Well I see what tonys sees in him your funnys your gorgus witty and very very bright .

But what do you see in Tony Tony been two bit hood ever since I know him .Hell never amount to anything and probible rot in jail or sent to the electric chair .Im glad he went to nam to stay out of trouble hes more likely to killed by the cops or some other rival gang .And the only reason he went to stay out of Jail.

Can I ask you a question Ray whyd you want to be a Detective .And your a good cop that what Tony call the worst kind .You been on the news and paper several times make arrest to many of Tony assocites .Tony always said that t fake big shot brother I have is make me look bad .If is wanst my know loyalty to sicdication and to loyety higher ups.The thing my brother doing to the sicdacation my head would be served on a platter with my ding dong shoved down my trough .


.It was a coolish september night and they were both shivering listen .If we dont get our fall jacket we will freeze to death .



At 16 and then when you and your wife were alsleep on another sleeping over Your yougest daughter 18th birthday Party. Uncle Tony I fucked your youngest whore mafia Daughter I shot a load big big in here tight tight vigin pussy very very big load . I must say.

Tony was flabergasted the thing coming out of his kid nefew mouth.
Know what Tony she was a virgin I was the first to broke her in and rode her like bucking bronko.When I was done I Turned her over up did her up the ass she was squeling like a pig sent to the slougher house.After that I went stright to the shower to scrub off thouse Mafia Princess whore Bitch Whore germs e!!Arnt you glad you trusted me over sucker !!!

Jj spit at him again he missed this time it was a big loogy v that bearly missed it slid slowly down and in his Gormet capicino cup and some on slowly into his wrist which he was .Tony bloted right up .And went for his gun .Nah to messy not every cop and reporters in my pocket .Kid you really,really pissed me off but I got a good sence of humor that really hope youll apprecate .Mabee will share a laugh if you see it my way or change your mind this is your last chance J J

J J spit and screamed he dickd your daughter for 2 years thosand of time forwards backwords doggy style from behind up the ass I shot her load thousand of loads stat on her face rode my dick down her cute little Msgfea Princess throat suck whore bitch this is all i dremded about since we were teens you were the reason il lost the weight pot driking and smoking start pitlates and body scouplting and aroroibcs and running lost the wieght mem would start noticing at the gynm and in high Shool but I never looked back I was saviing all for you J J I loved you since I was 12 I would right stories about us in my diries about us geeting married having children living here in the machen with daddy rest of lives .Id write some send it off to crative writing class one was so good I won 2nd prise that was 500 dollars I bought my self a special gift from vactoria secret when you un flower me that is what i was were when you snecked up to my room ad deaflower ,
Want to see story it about us living in a distant land you are the King and I am the queen we have 12 childen fight in the Kings and Queen army there good fighter there roughless like daddy and Mj .The Queen help the king give up his snuff problem the King happy how the queen did rea marryies her In the most romantic Wedding of all time .One honey moon the queen brigh 14 of here favorite 17 year old maidens .See the queen likes eating pussy even more than the king .For every night of honny moon the quenn will take a new virgin maden slow ley udresess her slowly take off here corset and say be nervors my dear take off all her clothes sperd her legs apart and say you shaven A meal fit for a royal queen like my self .What your name maiden Jenny I know your shy but you are going to have wonder feeling tonight so pleasurable never imagine in a millions years who thing the queen likes is virgin pussy and tease and suck it all queens lick fest for many hours on end .First slowly suck around thosess hearty cunt lips never toching the pussy testing then a quarter inch around them till you start lighly wimpering hai hia doing this forr 45 mintets about 20 minutes into this start blowing air with my mouth with all over the pussy will the mones of hie hie become louder and hips start swaving up words and upword after blowing it few times then while teasing and teasing the pussy till the queens cant help her selfstarts putting takig off her top and then unbutting her bra and corcet undoing her pantices feeling her for frirm nippels and carssesesing them in rythmic fassions till they throb sliding her hand down her belly still teaaing the maiden while doing this .
By that time the real fun begins the maiden pussy start thoubing and the pussy start glisting so much it osing out of the madens pussy making the Queee Ape shit with lust the queen stats slowly licking the out side tips of the labia lips .To the out side of labia only less seaistive outside part outside top bottom out outside top bottom one left right top bottom lickig and daring her tungue out sid top bottom left right faster and faster .The madien arch her hips to meet queens darting toungs who of the past maidens a few day back you go a tough of a camilaniil that the kings keeps for his pet zoo back at the palece .Then the queen remeber how that maiden gave a good pussy toungh lashing queen sucking on her cit so hard the Queen squrte alll over the maidint face the maident go so turded on by the queen she put the joices that waas steaming all over the maidne face took the with her long thin nimble finger the joies catching big droplet of on her tips of her finger and saying your hinest you and me mus tate the royal pussy juices.Do you mind yor hinest can I have the fist tate ,Go ahead the maided put her finger in her mouth and back in the bed upside down faceing the upsided down her puddy facig one thee only 4 inches from the queen face for queen the maidne had her thin tanned leg spread egal wide open the maden parting her pussy wide opem lips and clit flcking and pich the clit with her index finger till it thobs and trobs oses our sacretions and serchin streams out the maiden still maden virgin pussy,The madienttake her four knimble finger tips and parts her pussy in stick them three to four inches 2 or 3 fingers 4 and I wont be a virgin for later tonght for the
King take her sooked dribbing out pussy puts i two inces near the queen face hand and said face out of says want a taste noble pussy joice I come for long line of pure noble blood .

I come from s lonh lir fo nobeles who severed past King and queen were a good looking stock my mothe was a maidend for your mother the past queen I stayred at the royel palace til your father died that when your uncle took over he said no be no more of those kind of shinagans with me as King .He kicked me and your mother out in a snow storm dont come to this kingnom again till you kono rigth right and wrong and wrong I still dont care that the kid my niece is my fuck up horn ball brothers maiden mistess who he knocked up and niece .
Wait yous e side your were a noble so now im telling me you got royal blood how can that be .Well my mother had your fathers baby so yes have noble blood and haff Royal blood from your father .That make me your haif sister .The queen grabbed the midned hand quictly kissed her palm and liking the joices I always wanted a brother a sister after mom had me she could have and more she cried well sis incst is the best ,Will move you back to the palace right away sleep in out well alligh to our bed a a ajoying bed , If wwon of us get pregiant by the king you can do all the mothering and if get pregant by the king Ill do all the mothering of my kid .Then the queen cried and got up and though her salf the main I love you sis I love your sis but I donnt even know your first name Allison but you can call me ally close poeple I was close to call me Ally .You and the king will call your Ally ,Lsdy Duches Thondike Third air to the royal Kinddon .You wont be know who you are till superises Torrorrw is 24 bithday he really like suprise lite this .He and the king ffore this special day it also are wedding andvery we got marrid five years ago lost my viginity on this same bed thhat you will loose yours on tmorrow night you hand piced maiden we both picked to pic this specoal night and now that we know were family will treat with the ulmost reasect .
Tell me what is like to be de flowered .The queen had a litte too much to drink.
Like this











k as a

in her mouth too at spit him at this time it hit him in the eye .Tony bolted up and flinch for hit gum then slowly composted him self .Ok that was your last chance and your father gonna pay Im gonna get him
hurting the thing the most his bloved son J J.
Well youll now see I have a sence of humor Ill be laughing in my machin with Kitty and MJ.And the boys and Ill mail to your no good loser father I hope he get a kick out of it becase me the boys and M j gonna really laugh .While were by the pool by patio ording from the best chinise restrarant Pee King duck and best champange from the best Winories In the world .

June 8, 2016 at 7:36am
June 8, 2016 at 7:36am
#884134
The baby fly was flying around then he ended up on fly paper .Help dad im stuck I cant fly .The father fly said,I will get you out son but he go stuck on the fly paper too.Dad Dad what are we going to do said the baby fly to his father .

Well son theres good news and bad new whats the bad news said to the baby fly to his father where gona be here forever the when the poison take effect on the fly paper were gonna die have a very very painfull death and die .

Die Dad I dont want to die i just a baby .Said the baby fly
Whats the good news .

The Father fly said now well till the poison takes effect we still have a few minutes And A short Time time to do some father and son bonding
June 8, 2016 at 6:05am
June 8, 2016 at 6:05am
#884128
Man goes to Dr.

Dr. Dr The Pot I smoke make my bones ache .


The Dr Said must be poor joints .
June 8, 2016 at 5:30am
June 8, 2016 at 5:30am
#884125
Do you hear about the baby chic that was too nervous to hatch .

It was shell shocked
June 8, 2016 at 5:17am
June 8, 2016 at 5:17am
#884124
Where do you find Protitutes in The Red Light Distict ?


Though your Rear view mirror


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