The Right Thing to Do

I have a theory about murder.
It has been verified by the overabundance of lawyers in my family. Although none of them will go on record as endorsing this theory, I have grown quite confident in my plan.
Given an upstanding pillar of the community, with absolutely no record of criminal behavior, who pays taxes faithfully and attends church weekly, he/she/I could very likely get away with murder...ONCE.

My wife is a lovely woman and we have been married for 35 years. We have raised 2 great sons and live a comfortably successful life. In fact, all of that is an extreme understatement. She is an amazing woman that has walked beside me as a partner in business and as my best friend for all of those years. Intelligent, creative, compassionate and eager to please, I couldn’t have asked for a better wife and lover. Her beauty and adventurous spirit keep me young and eagerly embracing life.

“So where does my “murder theory” come into play?” You ask.
I have boded my time. I have bit my tongue and turned the other cheek. But today as I stand looking across the room at my lovely wife on the couch I know that the time has come. We are just a few hours past the crush of the “Holidays”, the dishes are all done, the left-overs sent home with kids and old folks, the wrapping paper stuffed into the trash bin. My wife, the one I described as all of those wonderful things, is now a fetal ball of sorrow and self-loathing. Three days spent with her demon...No, let me rephrase that, fifty-three years spent with this demon has left her unrecognizable. As I helplessly look over at her I too can hear the demon’s voice in her head.

“Why do you keep wearing your hair that way it looks terrible”
“Your boys are just as fat as your husband, why didn’t you raise them better”
“I can’t understand why you have allowed yourself to be destroyed by this man you call a husband”
“You have just been a huge disappointment…...ALWAYS”

Thus my “murder theory” has developed. It is not in my nature to be violent or unkind even, but I cannot watch this any longer. I think you can understand why it is absolutely necessary that I kill my Mother-In-Law….


Word Count: 395