Court Appointed Christianity

I broke the law once and got popped for it. After three days in county jail, I went in front of the judge. I was offered a plea, in which I avoid more jail time by completing a 90 day stay in Rehab, and some probation. I agreed to this and was released upon the condition I successfully complete the rehab program.

Little did I know, my Medicaid insurance, is not accepted by ANY treatment facility within the state. These programs cost about 50-60 grand on average, when you are self pay, so it looked like i was going back to county until somebody randomly steered me in the direction of a place called "The Haven of Rest" in Akron, Ohio.

I was told this was a residential facility that offered counseling and treatment for addiction. I was approved and went there the next day to be processed in. Little did i know, "Haven of Rest" was no treatment facility, it was a homeless shelter and halfway house. Every inmate in Northeastern Ohio who is released with no home or fixed address gets sent to the "Haven".

I arrived expecting a "hospital" type setting, but this was no hospital. I spent an hour crammed in a room with rows of plastic chairs and a cement floor. the environment was hostile, nobody was friendly, nobody was smiling or laughing. The African Americans sat on one side, and the white guys sat on the other. This was almost EXACTLY like being in county.

Even though it was snowing and raining at the same time, i walked outside and decided to walk to the park next door. This is "Grace Park" in Akron, Ohio. It is notorious for drug activity and violence. I walked into the park and tried to charge my dying cell phone in a broken outlet in a street light. There were groups of guys stationed at every corner of the park. The group closest to me were smoking weed, being loud, and looking at me as an intruder. One of these guys broke from the group, and started walking right towards me. in an aggressive, very loud manor, he yelled "What's up man?" Now, he was not concerned about my well being, he was really saying "You are in the WRONG place!" and "You better not be a cop" I shrugged and said "cant get my phone working." He said nothing and walked back to his group. He had made his point.

I gave up on charging my phone and went back inside. The lights began to flicker and somebody yelled "chow!" We all lined up single file, all 300+ of us, and were led to another building across the street where we waited outside for about 20 minutes. The doors on this building swung open, and everybody filed in and had to check in with a guy on a computer. We had to give our name and social security number in order to spend the night.

We then were herded into a room that had a piano and stage just like a choir room. We waited until a large group of Mennonite men women and children walked onto the stage and began singing Christmas carols that I had never heard before. The women all had on long prairie dresses with matching bonnets, while the men all wore white button up shirts with suspenders. The men also wore beards on their necks and chins. Their mustaches, cheeks and chins were all clean shaven, but they all had thick beards on their necks. They finished singing, and then one of the men gave an awkward sermon where he compared Jesus Christ to "coca-cola". Saying that coke's slogan "the real thing" was blasphemous and Jesus was in fact "the real thing".

We lined up for dinner, and were given a tray with a stale sandwich and a small carton of milk. Everyone ate in silence. I followed the crowd back to the original building, and was told to line up single file again. I was tossed a pair of old pajama bottoms and we were ushered into the shower room. There were about 20 shower stalls, all with no curtain. You never truly appreciate your privacy until you have to shower in the same room as about 150 other guys, with no curtains at all.

After the shower I was given a number and pointed in the direction of my bed. All of the beds were metal bunk beds arranged barracks style with about 70 or so guys in each row. A "lights out" order was given, and everyone went to sleep and most began snoring. I didn't sleep a wink that night.

At 5:45 am, members of the staff came in screaming and beating on the metal bars of the beds for us to wake up. one guy did not stir at all, and so the staff member grabbed the side of his mattress and tipped it over so the guy rolled onto the cold tile floor. It seemed like this was an everyday occurrence.

We lined up for breakfast, and were again herded into that choir room to sit through another religious service. This time given by a staff member who was confident in telling us that we will never be "good people" if we do not accept Jesus Christ as our savior. I went to Catholic School for 9 years, and became very anti-religion. So this was starting to trouble me, but i said nothing.

I was horrified to learn that if we wanted to eat, we had to listen to a religious service. Three times a day. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner. If you wanted 3 meals, you had to listen to 3 services. This was ridiculous to me, but I just kept my mouth shut and waited out the days.

There was violence as well. Fist fights were common. I remember waking up one night to barbaric screaming, and blood splatter all over the floor. Turned out some guy put a padlock inside of his sock, and used it like a blackjack to beat another man's skull until it fractured. I don't know what caused it, but I heard the guy who got his skull fractured had snitched about something or other.

There were also 2 separate murders within the 90 days I was there. The first one happened when one guy grabbed a tree branch and hit another guy who was sleeping on a park bench. Apparently, he hit this sleeping man so hard, and so many times with a branch, that he killed him. That was the first murder.

The second murder happened on Christmas Eve, and regretfully, I had a front row seat. It happened in Grace Park, of course. I have reservations about telling what I saw for fear of retribution, but I am fairly sure Akron PD closed this case and got the man responsible, so I will share exactly what I remember. If nothing else, to get it off my chest.

I knew the guys involved. We were not friends by any means, but I knew them. Bobby was in his later 30s, and in later stage of alcoholism with a speech impediment. I remember he used to drink mouthwash in the shower. "Big Black" the other guy, lived in the woods of Akron, sold weed, and looked exactly how you would expect a man called "Big Black" to look. He looked just like a black Santa Clause. Round, stout figure, with a long white flowing beard. He looked like Santa, but this was no jolly fat man. This guy is one of the most cold blooded, ruthless street guys i ever met. I had gotten a few small bags of weed from him, and never had a problem with him myself, but i heard stories that he had done prison time for murder at the state prison in Marion, Ohio.

So, it's Christmas Eve in Grace Park. I was sitting on a park bench trying to roll a cigarette, when the sound of tense, raised voices caught my attention. Bobby was stammering and stuttering loudly while Big Black yelled "You trying to play me? I don't play! You think this is some little kid shit right here?" Black quieted down and Bobby stammered out "I'm sorry man. I thought it was all there! I wasn't trying to do nothing." Big Black became perfectly still, there was an intense but vacant look in his eyes. "All right man, we good." Black's voice was calm, but the tension was still in his face and body. Bobby ignorantly took a step towards Black and held up his hand for a high five apology. Bobby said "Man I'm sor..." but was cut off quickly as Big Black cocked back and swung full force on Bobby, striking the side of his head so hard that I heard a "pop" as the impact jerked his head to the side. Bobby's knees buckled, and he fell face first into the concrete and was motionless. Black screamed at the limp, defenseless man, warning him in past tense "you see what happens?" and "fuck with me again!"

Everyone who was around went completely silent. My inner voice was telling me to run away, but I did not listen. Then Bobby began to convulse. At first it was a few twitches here and there, but it soon became a violent seizure. He would gasp and choke while blood spill out of his mouth and nose. I remember he made a noise that was sickens me to this day. You know the sound you make when your mouth is closed and your lips are sealed, but you force air out your mouth and it makes your laps flap and vibrate making a very distinct noise? Horses can make a similar sound after a wienie or a neigh. Bobby made this "horse" sound with his lips over and over again in between spitting, choking, and coughing on blood and foam.

Black realized what was happening. He cussed under his breath and took off in a brisk, but not panicked jog towards the woods. I do not remember anyone there calling the police, but paramedics arrived, and rushed him into the ambulance. We would come to learn that Bobby died on the way to the hospital. I asked why "Big Black" suckered him like that, and I was told that Bobby only gave Black 3$ for 5$ worth of weed. So Black hit him.

I remember a detective on the scene long after the ambulance had left. He just said in a loud voice "Anybody see anything?" He wasn't even looking at anybody when he asked this. After about 2 seconds of silence, he turned to another police office and said "Whole park full of people and nobody saw anything." He shook his head in disgust. "typical" he said.

A few days later, the police arrested the wrong guy for the murder. The guy they arrested was big, black, but he went by the name "LiL Black" After hours of questioning and establishing an alibi, police realized they had the wrong man. Instead of apologizing, they charged him with some "probation violation" and he ended up going back to jail. I am not entirely positive if they ever caught "Big Black", but I assume they did. They definitely knew that somebody named "black" was responsible.

As my time was winding down, my release grew closer, and my contempt for the religious ceremonies and sermons was festering inside. There was one staff member in particular, who loved to hear himself preach. He was the most arrogant, rude, person on the entire staff. He would talk to people as if they were too stupid to understand his words. He would yell and scream everything he said as well. Everything this man said and did annoyed every fiber of my being.

One morning this staff member was quoting a verse from the old testament about rebels, and rebellion. Then he screamed "If you are a rebel, you are an enemy of the Lord Jesus!" I could no longer listen to him. I raised my hand. He looked right at me and said "no questions right now. I AM talking" He rambled on and after a few minutes I raised my hand again. He looked at me with disgust and said "Yes, what is it?"

I said "You say that a rebel is an enemy of Jesus.?"

"Yes, that is correct." He said confidently.

"Well, is it not true that Jesus rebelled against the Roman Government?"-Me

"No, hold on! That is not the same thing! Jesus did what was right! Jesus was not a rebel!"-Him

"You were saying that disobeying authority is an act of rebellion. Jesus disobeyed"-(he cuts me off)

"Hold on now dude, don't you call Jesus a rebel! If you say Jesus was a rebel one more time, we are going to have a big problem." At this point, people were upset and talking among themselves. His ignorance was beginning to show through. He yelled "Alright, line up,! Time to eat!" I was starting to get to him.

The very next day, first thing in the morning, the idiot was standing in front of everyone preaching, again. This time he was talking about the Crucifixion. I don't know if the story of the crucifixion is true, but it is something I take seriously. I respect anyone who is willing to die for what they believe. So I listened to this man's version of the story and I said nothing. Not until the end of his sermon, when he said "that is why God sent Jesus to die for our sins. So man could be saved. Nobody was saved before Jesus came to earth."

My hand immediately went up. He looked at me, and said "YES?" Only this time he did not act like I was beneath him.

"So, nobody was saved before Jesus?" I said.

"Yes, that is what I said." His arrogance was coming back.

"Well, what about all of the people who were around before Jesus was even born? I mean, for centuries, there were entire civilizations and cultures of people, who never knew Jesus. These people worshiped the Sun, Stars, and other Gods. These people never had the chance to accept Jesus, because Jesus wasn't around. So are you saying that all of these people were bad people? So all of those people are burning in hell for eternity? They never had a chance to learn about Jesus, let alone convert to Christianity. That does not seem fair."

He rolled his eyes uncomfortably and let out a rare "Ah well, back in those times, people were judged more for their actions and what they did and what they said.."

So Jesus changed changed what happened to a person after they die?"

"Look man, if you are so curious, walk to the library, get on a computer, and look it up! I don't know much about it!" His true colors were finally showing. He was angry, and was taking my questions as insults to his beliefs. I do not think he had ever thought about the people who came before Jesus. This empty-headed, loud mouthed prick finally admitted he had no idea what he was talking about. If he was honest with himself, he would have realized right then and there, that he had no business preaching to anyone at all. He was one of the most disrespectful, arrogant people I have ever had to share oxygen with, and yet he was militant about Christianity and the bible. A complete hypocrite. One bible passage that I will always remember, and that I try and live by is "Treat others the way you want to be treated." Apparently he missed that passage.

I was released from the program 3 days early with no explanation. That was a long, terrible, and dangerous time in my life. I believe that adding or "forcing" religion upon anyone is a crime against humanity in general. Let alone, a government funded organization forcing the hungry and desperate to undergo a religious ceremony in order to eat, is unconstitutional and illegal. What happened to the separation of church and state?

Oh well. What do I know?

Please know that I respect a person's right to believe in a God of their choosing. I believe in God, but I do not believe in organized nrel

Hey thanks for reading this...If you actually read the whole thing.