My Heart knows

The Whatsapp notification comes up showing that there is a message ...l look at my screen and there is a dot ...only a full stop?Its 0138hrs .l look at my phone screen and the familiar feeling comes back again...The familiar feeling of comfort,anxiety ,fear and not knowing what to expect.

A fullstop .."l know you too well done  my darling ...l know you too well "..l toss and turn for two hours wondering what my life was becoming.lt had been a month since our breakup.Who would have thought that after the way l had been so obsessed about you l would not be jumping out of my bed and running back to you.

For some reason l was still ,my world was still.... l had the sense of realisation.l acknowledged that l loved you..thats a constant it won't change .But the anxiety was gone,the fear of losing you is gone.l lay down and wonder why l am alright now with knowing that you are there and noone will take you.

l remember the way l would go through your facebook photos  looking for the clues ,watching the number of times you had been on WhatsApp...l was obsessed with you!

l remember kneeling down in prayer asking God why all that was going wrong was happening...and now to wake up this morning and see your name and l dont jump back to you.

Could it be the fact that l might have been expected you to come back one day or l had decided that you were out of my life?