Remembering
Maggie
The
sun was shining out in my yard. I could hear the birds chirping and
I breathed in the fresh air. It felt…perfect, and the warm
sunlight beamed down on my face. Maggie was there, sitting in the
dewy grass with the kids. They smiled at me and I smile back and we
at sandwiches on a picnic blanket. My daughter chased butterflies
and my son played in the sandbox and I kissed my wife, never feeling
more proud.
I
woke up , eyes droopy, bright lights blinding me. I could hear a
beeping, a rhythmic beeping, endlessly beeping. My eyes began to
adjust to my surroundings, slowly but surely I could make out what
was around me. I could make out what almost looked like a face, a
face hovering over me. The face turned to look the their side, they
yelled something out, I couldn’t make it out, my mind was too
foggy to understand what was being said. Soon I could see a crowd of
faces, I could just
make out astonishment in their expression. Their voices sounded as
though they were under water. Deep and distant, slowly but surely I
could make out was being said.
“…..awake”
“Hi…….ye……ope…ing”
“Twenty-five
years…”
My
eyes opened wide as I heard the first cohesive statement come from
one of the many faces that surrounded me. The sudden shock forced
reality to come rushing back, my eyes adjusted rapidly and the faces
became visible. I was in a hospital, weak and tired, surrounded by
vague and unfamiliar faces. The people around me hugged my bed
ridden body, I do not remember these people, they say they know me,
they say they love
me. I forget, I forget who they are and it creates a lump in my
throat as I try not to cry.
The
doctor walks in, disperses the crowd, explains the situation. It’s
like something out of a movie, a lot of “Twenty-five years in a
coma” and “A lot has changed” and “Life won’t
be quite the same for a while” The doctor says I can’t
leave for a while, says it’s not a good idea to leave without
proper testing and making sure I’m strong enough for daily
life.
Everyday
I’m cared for by nurses, the nurses feed me, they help me with
physical therapy to help my atrophied muscles. It takes several
months before I’m able to leave the hospital. It’s not
uncommon for people to visit me, they tell me what has changed, they
tell me about advances in technology and what has happened in the
family, my son Jack has grown up into such a strong man, he is
married now to a beautiful woman and they have a six month old baby.
My daughter Chloe has become a doctor, she lives a comfortable life
with her wife and the two of them are planning to adopt a young boy
by the name of Daniel. My entire family has grown up in the blink of
an eye, I have become a modern day Rip Van Winkle.
After
a couple weeks I begin to wonder about my wife, Maggie. At first I
thought she may have been reluctant to see her husband after I was in
such a long coma. One day I begin to notice that my children seem to
be holding something back from me, they are distant about some
subjects. I can see sadness in their eyes when I bring up Maggie
when I reminisce about the past. One day I decide to ask Chloe why
Maggie hasn’t visited and she begins to cry. I look at her
startled and I begin to understand the situation. My daughter looks
back at me through her tears and tells me that Maggie killed herself
after I was in a coma for ten years.
The
news is heart breaking, I feel a pain in my chest so hard the wind in
knocked out of me. I ask Chloe to leave the room, I do not eat that
day, I was not visited by a nurse that day. I spend the rest of the
day looking back at my life, what I remember of Maggie, her eyes, her
smile, the way that she laughed, the way that she always knew what
she was doing. She was the last person I would have imagined to have
killed herself but she did. I could
have become completely brain dead, it was something for her to worry
about. I remembered when I met her, when we used to spend late
nights in each other’s arms watching movies and making fun of
the actors. It was bliss for she was bliss personified, and now she
was gone.
I
told Chloe the stories of Maggie and I, how she always wanted to
travel to Africa because she wanted to watch an African thunder storm
in the arms of a lover. I told her about when I married Maggie and
how she couldn’t have been more beautiful on that day, I had
hoped to last an eternity with that beautiful woman, to start every
morning and end every night with her. Chloe was consoling, she
herself was still dealing with the death of her mother, Jack had been
quicker to accept it but according to Chloe he had become quieter
after Maggie’s death. Jack left the house at eighteen, rarely
ever came back until he met his wife. Jack never went to college,
he’s been a slacker his entire life by what Chloe tells me,
although he’s clearly running away from something that’s
bothering him.
Chloe
finally opens up to me about her life, she tells me about when she
met her wife, when she came out as a lesbian to the family, how after
she came out she’s always wondered how I would feel. I tell
her that I love her, that I could never hate her for the way that she
is, she hugs me and kisses me on the cheek, tears of happiness roll
down her cheek as something that has been weighing on her is finally
taken off of her shoulders.
I
am put through extensive physical therapy for a year before I am able
to leave the hospital again. When I am permitted to leave my family
holds a surprise party for me in my daughter’s house, I meet
her wife Heather for the first time and I couldn’t be more
proud for Chloe. Jack is there too, his wife Amber is there as well,
the two of them are good to each other but I can tell their
relationship is strained for unspoken reasons. We talk in the living
room while my sister and her husband make dinner. We eat a delicious
meal before gathering in the living room again, we play games, we
talk about the past, we talk about the happy things that happened
when I was in the coma.
I
am now a sixty-three year old man, my wife killed herself fifteen
years ago, my son and daughter have lead successful lives and have
begun to settle down. Chloe and Heather are kind enough to keep me
in their house as my old house fell to disrepair. I may have lost
the love of my life but I have found comfort in a family willing to
care for a man who has lost twenty-five years of his life. I have
time to make up for and a family I would like nothing more than to
spend it with.
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