Distracted

Distracted

She was barely an adult when it started. An insatiable passion from within that she neither understood nor knew how to act upon and right now it was driving her insane! What do you do when those feelings surface? A burning need to write it all down without the distractions of her ordinary life. An ordinary husband, ordinary children, a lifestyle that could only be described as average but the fire in her heart and mind she could no longer ignore. 'It's time' the voice kept repeating in her head, 'It's time to begin'. She didn't understand it and frankly didn't need it right now, so many ordinary things to be doing and yet there was that word again 'Ordinary'. Was this how she imagined her life as a child? Living in a fantasy of dolls and fairies, schooling and sleepovers? That childlike dream of Prince Charming's and white weddings and 'when I grow up I want to be' but that was where the dream ended for she never really knew what she wanted to be! A mish mash of 'maybe this or maybe that' but no clear focus, no direction, just a push from a parent when all else failed, suggestions of careers that were 'ok' but still not quite the future she felt was for her and now all of these years later it had not changed. The 'dream' was still undreamt and unrealised as she struggled to decipher what it all meant and what this voice wanted from her. All she knew is that 'this' wasn't it and as her frustrations grew the desire for change grew also. What was it that stopped her working it all out and moving forward? Well family life wasn't helping, that much she did know. Constant interruptions to her chain of thought helped nobody as she grew tired of thinking and bad tempered with the sheer hopelessness of her situation. Just one prevailing thought remained this day. Time to get out. Time to fly.