A Puzzle in Love

As Andiana always did when watching a play, she inwardly assessed the male actors who were acting out Shakespeare’s “Othello” on the stage.  She much preferred the actor who played Cassio to the one who played Othello; in fact, upon reflection, she was extremely attracted to the tall, very handsome, young man with dirty blond hair who played Cassio and spoke and moved with the confidence of a military leader.  She found him to be the strong point of the play.  She thought that the Gray University Drama Department had tried to insert too much humour into the play, which she thought was inappropriate for the play.

A meet-and-greet occurred on the second floor after the play was finished.  Andiana stood a few feet away from the buffet table without so much as holding a beverage.  Andiana was a part-time model, as well as being an English student at Gray University.  Her hair was blond and flowed smoothly and sleekly to her shoulders.  Her eyes were blue and possessed a remarkable intensity that seemed related to a snowy, windy day.  She wore a light pink dress, red high heels, simple gold earrings, and a necklace with a pendant inlaid with gold.  A few different men walked nonchalantly towards her with all the bravery of knights riding into battle; but she rejected them one by one, with sharp turns of her head and shoulders away from them, and they altered their courses and left her alone.  The young man who had played Cassio gallantly walked toward her.

“Hello,” he said to her.  She turned her eyes towards his.  He had donned a suit and tie.

“Hello,” she said.

“What’s your name?”

“Andiana.”

“I’m Edward.  Do you go to Gray University?”

“Yes.”

“What’s your major?”

“English.”

“Who’s your favorite author?”

“Jane Austen.  Who is yours?”

“Kurt Vonnegut.  You’re the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.”

“Thank you.”  She smiled.

“Would you have dinner with me, at Ontario Sushi, on Friday?”



“How many women have you slept with?” Andiana asked Edward at their table in Ontario Sushi, heedless of the other customers.  They had been discussing the television show Sex and the City, and the conversation had taken a racy turn.

“A lot,” said Edward.

“Over fifty?” asked Andiana, with an impish grin.

“Twenty-eight.”

“How old are you?”

“Twenty-three.”

“That’s quite a record,” said Andiana, nodding her head.  “That’s probably in the top ten of impressive numbers that I’ve heard for that question.”

“Mhm.  And what about you?  How many men?”  She smiled, her mouth closed.

“Forty-five.”

“I guess you win.  And how old are you?”

“Twenty-one.”

“I’d say that your number of men is the one most impressive number I’ve heard for that question,” said Edward.



Edward opened the fridge in his and his roommate’s kitchen.  Andiana peered inside.

“Organic milk, eh?  Healthy, I guess,” she said.

“Yes…I like to buy organic and free range foods…because the animals are mistreated in factory farms.”

“I see,” she said.  “I have genital herpes, Edward.  I get no symptoms, and if you wear a condom then you should be fine; but you should know.  There is always a small risk, but it’s really tiny if you use a condom and don’t give me oral sex.”

“O.K.  No problem.”

After that night, though it was not said aloud, it was understood by both of them that they were “together”.



Andiana liked English tutorials.  Her Teaching Assistant, who led the tutorial on behalf of the Professor, was intelligent and seemed to have read every novel.  Andiana was an outstanding student, and she enjoyed showing off her depth of understanding during tutorial sessions, in which a small portion of the class answered questions posed by the Teaching Assistant about novel readings on a weekly basis.  Typically, every male in the tutorial would be in love with her, which she also enjoyed.  It was virtually as good when they loved her from afar, as it was when she had been single, and they had loved her intimately and physically.  All that she did not like about English tutorials was that Edward was never, ever there.

The subject of the tutorial was Ernest Hemingway’s The Sun Also Rises.  It went well for Andiana, with the Teaching Assistant agreeing with everything she said and frequently using the word “excellent” in praise of her.  Once in the tutorial session, she stated that the novel clearly recorded that a certain character had had sexual relations with the main female character; which was, in fact, incorrect, for once, but the T.A. still agreed with her, and praised her comment as “excellent”.  At the end of the class, the T.A. asked her to stay late to discuss something about her essay, which was in the process of being marked.

‘In your essay about “Gatsby”’, he said, “You use a really excellent tone; at once academically objective, and engaging and entertaining.  In my view, you clearly have the talent already to be a successful writer, probably in whatever way you choose.”

“Well, thank you John, that’s really flattering,” she said.

“Should you need a reference to something related to English or writing, just let me know.  I’d be happy to write you a letter or be a reference contact any time.”

“Well, that’s great; a letter of reference along writing lines would be invaluable to me.”

“It’s yours.”  As she looked into his eyes, he appeared handsome to her in a quiet and dignified way.  She guessed his age as thirty-two years old.  “I feel lucky, for one, to have you in the class.  I suppose a young woman of your intelligence and beauty could do literally anything; but English; why English?”  She was struck suddenly by how close he was to her.  They were practically touching, and yet she did not recall him moving closer.

“Well, I’ve always loved novels,” she said.  “You can’t rely on people, necessarily; but you can trust in a novel.  It won’t abandon you, or do something to hurt you.”

“Have people abandoned or hurt you?” he said in a sympathetic tone.

“Sometimes.”  He kissed her on the lips.  She gently broke away.  “No,” she said.  “I love my boyfriend.”

“I won’t tell him,” John said gently, and he kissed her on the lips again.  He put his hand around her waist and drew her closer to him.

“No, John,” she said, but it lacked force and integrity, and sounded like a question.  He kissed her on the lips for a whole minute, as much to keep her quiet as anything else.  As he kissed her, his hands pushed down the straps of her shirt.  At first she gently tried to push his hands away, but he overpowered her, and by the time he had undone her bra, she had ceased resisting.



“That was awfully good, I thought,” said Edward, smiling.  They were leaving a cinema.

“I agree,” she said.  Edward is so handsome, she thought.  He is probably the handsomest man that I have ever seen.  The best man that I have ever known.  “Oh Edward, I love you so.  When we aren’t together, my chest constricts and I think I’m going to die.  You’ll never leave me, will you, honey?”

“I’ll never leave you,” said Edward.  “I wouldn’t want to be alive without you.  Come on, let’s go home.”

“Oh I can’t tonight.  I’ve got an essay due tomorrow, and I’ve got a lot of work to do on it.”

“Oh.  O.K.  Well, I’ll take you home then.”



“I’m bored, Dana,” said Andiana to her roommate later that evening.  “Let’s go to a pub.”

“Sure honey,” said Dana ruefully.

At the popular Twelve Strings pub, Dana viewed her roommate with thinly veiled disgust.  As the two talked at the bar, Andiana standing up and Dana seated, Dana could not help but notice Andiana making eyes and smiling flirtatiously at men left, right, and center.  In fact, thirty seconds into Dana and Andiana’s conversation, before they had ordered any drinks, two different young men were simultaneously attempting to talk to Andiana.  Andiana watched the two compete for her attention with cool amusement; after a moment, it was apparent to Dana that Andiana was quietly speaking the lines of “eenie-meenie-miney-mo,” her finger switching between the two men rhythmically as she recited the childish rhyme.  At last her finger settled on the one to her left, and she gave him her undivided attention.  Within ten minutes, the two left together, though Dana noted that the young man had not even mentioned his name.

“Have a super night, Dana!” said Andiana, leaving.

“Uh-huh,” said Dana acidly.  How could she do this to Edward? she thought.  It surprised her for only one reason; Andiana had told her that Edward was Andiana’s true and only love.



Andiana wept, in bed, next to the young man, who, despite their intimate union, was still a stranger to her.

“What is it?” the man asked.

“Never mind babe,” she said.



That evening, Edward reread pages 40 – 123 of Shakespeare’s King Lear, and practiced a few lines from it in the role of Kent, filming his performance on his laptop and reviewing it.



Edward’s acting class performed King Lear on the 1st of April, fully two weeks since Edward had last seen Andiana.  She had ignored his calls and messages, and once, when he waited outside her apartment building hoping to speak with her, she had not surfaced the entire day; and yet, he knew that she was alright, because she had continued to update her Facebook profile.  She had changed her profile picture to a photograph of her lying across the laps of three young men on her couch, her face evocative of arousal.

For these reasons, he was very surprised to see her in the audience during the play, apparently alone.  After the play, during the meet-and-greet, she stood alone by a door to the second floor seats.  She looked as beautiful as ever.  She wore a violet dress, slender black shoes, a shiny silver necklace and simple, silver earrings.  Her back was turned to the party, and she gazed at the closed door to the seats on the upper floor.  Edward walked up to her from behind.

“Hey Andy,” he said.  She turned to him and met his eyes.

“Hey Eddie,” she said softly.  “Swell performance.”

“Thanks for coming,” he said, unsmiling.  “How about a hug?”  They embraced.

“Please take me back, honey,” she said to him.

“O.K.,” he said, unsmiling.



“When I was a girl,” said Andiana, with her arm across Edward’s chest, in Edward’s bed, “I was raped by my father, as well as my uncle.”

“I’m sorry Andiana,” said Edward.  “Is it still happening?”

“I don’t talk to them now,” said Andiana.

“How long did it go on for?”

“My father started molesting me when I was ten.  It stopped when I was seventeen, because I threatened to call the police.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“They were my family.  I thought I owed them more.”

“I don’t agree.”  She shrugged.  “I’m sorry, Andiana.”

“Then maybe you’ll be nice about the next part,” said Andiana.  “Because you know I cheated on you.”

“Yes,” he said, grimly.

“With my English T.A.”

“What’s his name again?”

“John.”



John MacAdams had walked past Dundas and Corvette, and was making his way towards Hera and Corvette, on his way home.  He noticed a handsome young man walking rather close to him, and resolved to stop suddenly and allow the strange young man to pass.  As John stopped, the young stranger grabbed him by his shirt collar and thrust him into an alley and against a brick wall.

“You like Andiana do you!?” Edward shouted at John, and punched him in the stomach.  “Did you rape her, Johnny!?”  Edward punched John hard on the arm.  There were tears in Edward’s eyes.  “Stay the hell away from her, you old bastard!”  John was crumpled up against the brick wall, attempting to recover.  Edward ran off, towards the side of the alley opposite to the one he had entered on.



“Andiana,” said Edward softly.  “If you ever cheat on me again, we’re through.”  Andiana laughed.  “Andiana,” said Edward, meeting her eyes.  They were lying beside each other in bed.  “I assaulted a man today.  I can’t take it, clearly.  If you ever cheat on me again, we’re through.  You hear me, don’t you?”  There was a pause.  Andiana laughed again.  Edward remained silent for several seconds, then said, “Or perhaps we’re through already.”  It was Andiana’s turn to be silent.  After a minute, she said, “O.K. Edward.  I will never cheat on you again, or else…we’re through.  I will never cheat on you again.”