Psychology of Homosexuality

On January 29, 2013 I was going through my LGBT news feed to see what was going on in the gay community. That evening, The Advocate posted a short article informing its readers that Jaiden Bell had been taken off of life support after a suicide attempt; he was fifteen years old. The news was very upsetting, but it wasn’t a surprise. We live in an era where gay teens commit suicide when unable to handle the condemnation that anti-gay supporter often put on them.  Jaiden Bell decided to “hang himself on a playground structure at Central Elementary School” after reports of being bullied (Williams). It was said that Jaiden loved cheerleading and volunteering with senior citizens. It seemed to me that Jaiden was no different from any other teen with his own interests and did the things he loved. Apparently, to the bullies, being gay was a big enough difference to ridicule and bully him--literally to death. I sat in my room and thought to myself. Homosexuality has become such a big topic in, not just America, but the world. Anti-gay efforts seem to be a worldwide occurrence. When you look down at the reality of it all, is there anything really wrong with homosexuals? Do they really intervene in everyone’s daily life so much that they need to be condemned? Are they even that different biologically, psychologically, and developmentally to be the hot topic of the world? The only difference between a homosexual and a heterosexual is the gender preference. Just because a guy, like Jaiden, likes to cheer doesn’t make him gay just as a guy playing football doesn’t make him straight. I wonder if we are at all really that different. Do homosexuals grow up and develop differently to the point that they deserve to be called different, or does the idea of a same-sex relationship cloud the fact that homosexuals grow up and develop just the same as heterosexuals?

In order to determine if we are truly different we need to take a look at the debate “nature vs. nurture”. Many people think that homosexual behaviors extend from birth while others support the idea that homosexuals were molded into the behaviors. There was a study done in the 1980’s at the Kinsey Institute where the psychologist interviewed 1000 homosexuals and 500 heterosexuals. The study supposedly “assessed nearly every imaginable psychological case of homosexuality-parental relationships, childhood sexual experiences, peer relationships, dating experiences” (Myer 488).  They ended up with the conclusion that homosexual must have been smothered by their mothers, neglected by fathers, or sexually abused. Psychologist then looked at their findings and dismissed them. Many heterosexuals go through the same events that the study claimed created homosexuals. In another study it was thought that in a set of twins, if one was gay the other would be as well since they share similar genes and grow up in the same environment. This goes to show that environmental factors may not cause a difference in sexual orientation. It appears that heterosexuals and homosexuals share similar experiences growing up, some good and some bad, and yet that doesn’t show a true difference between the two. If environmental factors and sexual orientation don’t have a strong correlation then it is possible that the brain might. Simon LeVay did a study on cadavers in order to see if he could find any difference in the structure in the brain. It turns out that homosexual men and heterosexual women had smaller brain cell clusters compared to heterosexual men. David G. Myers states “LeVay believes it is more likely that brain anatomy influences sexual orientation” (490). In fact Laura Allen and Roger Gorski came to the same conclusion stating that the “fibers that connect the two brain hemispheres” seem to be larger in homosexual men than in heterosexual men (Myers 490). I found that to be very interesting. I never thought that the structure of the brain would vary with sexual orientation. There have been theories that homosexuality may be passed down on the mother’s side of the family but there have not been any strong studies to support the conclusion. From looking into the information it still looks as if psychologists are not sure what the origin of homosexuality is. There are many studies thrown around but none can support the fact that homosexuality is biological. Even the idea of the “gay gene” seems to be a weak argument. There are two things that many psychologists can agree on; the idea the homosexuality typically starts at a young age, and the fact that the structure of the brain and neural networks of homosexual men are similar to heterosexual women. I can’t say whether or not the evidence I found is strong enough to prove that there is a true difference between the two. Sure, the finding with the structure of the brain is a pretty significant finding, but most of those studies were done with fully grown adults. What about the idea that homosexual behaviors start at an early age? Maybe it doesn’t start when we are born or during our infancy. Maybe homosexual tendencies develop in the toddler stages.  Most of the psychologists agreed that homosexuality develops early on; maybe that is when developmental differences become evident.

It is not unusual for children to play with the opposite gender toys early on in their childhood. At that point in time, children have not yet experienced any true gender identity or concept of sexuality. I read in the book Oddly Normal: “It seems that sexual orientation goes through a dormant stage during the childhood years. I notice that my son preferred playing with dolls, which was not exactly that unusual, but any reason to truly believe he was gay was not there” (Schwarts). Even Mr. Skoog, the AP Psychology teacher here at Lakota West, stated that kids go through the “cootie stage” and boy seem to conform and join each other into groups, “the he-man-woman-haters-club” as Skoog likes to call it. In some cases, homosexual behaviors are shown at this early stage in life. It seems to mostly occur in boys. When boys and girls start to group with their own gender at times, a boy may decide to join the group of girls. They are usually pushed out of the group and left feeling isolated. That would be the start of, what I call, the “I am alone and different” phase. Many boys during this phase tend to play by themselves and begin to be tormented by the other kids who established groups. In a study done by Savin and Williams in 1995, they found that most homosexual men recalled feeling attraction to the same-sex by the age of 10. Most people don’t remember back as far as early childhood but understanding the fact that many homosexual men recall the attraction at that age is a fascinating find. Sexual stereotypes and gender roles are developed at this age as well. Children begin to model themselves after other adults and learn the roles that they are suppose to fulfill. It can be very confusing for a child that eventually identifies as homosexual. Heterosexual children typically feel in their place. Boys begin to fall into the role of masculinity which is often shown in their fathers. Girls naturally fall into a feminine role as well. To society this is normal, but for many kids at this age they feel confused of what roles they need to fulfill, not necessarily because they feel masculine or feminine, but more so the interest they have don’t follow society’s norms. In the book Oddly Normal by John Schwartz, John read in an article that “gender nonconformity greatly increases the likelihood of that child becoming homosexual...” (17). Obviously there are exceptions to the case but it surely does make sense that the rejection of normal gender roles may contribute to the child’s latten views of what sexuality is. Trying to understand sexuality and sexual orientation during the childhood years is solely based off of observable behaviors of the children. It seems that, even with the support of the studies, that it is clear that the childhood of heterosexuals and homosexuals are different. Heterosexuals typically fall into the “right place” while homosexual children float around trying to figure out where they truly fit in. This feeling appears to carry on into the teenage years as well. Sexual orientation can be better explained during the teenage years. It is shown that sexuality plays a major role at this stage and for many homosexuals, it’s one of the most difficult, confusing, and stressful years of their lives. 

During the adolescent years teenagers begin to develop sexual characteristics; hormones are increased and sexual desires begin as well.  According to Seven Counties Services, “it is considered quite normal for youth to feel somewhat uncertain or ambivalent about their sexual orientation” (Oswalt). During that time of uncertainty some teens experiment with the same-sex. Even teens that had a past of homosexual behavior will still go through the confusion stage. A teenager dating is a very important part of the adolescent experience. During these years boys and girls try to impress each other and ask one another out on dates and to dances. For most heterosexuals, dating becomes a major focus of their life. They tend to lean heavily on the support of their peers for advice on relationships and sexual desire. The pressure of friends and the idea of fitting in take over a teens mind. There are many struggles that teens go through; most of them are easy to overcome with the right support.  For most teenagers the parents play a very important role during this time. The parent-child relationship at times becomes rocky but even then parents try to give to their teens about sex, drugs, and alcohol. Whether teenagers know it or not, the average parent gives a lot of support and guidance during the adolescent years.  For the homosexual teenager, there is a feeling of loneliness and lack of support. There is an internal struggle with accepting the idea of being homosexual. The feeling that their desires are a sin, or that they are alone, or the feeling that they will be judge are just a few of many thoughts that run through a gay teens mind. There is a very important phase that every homosexual teenager goes through, over time this phase has been identified as the “closeted vs. coming out” phase. The term closeted means to hide the identity of being homosexual. Coming out is a term used when a person decides to publicly identify themselves as being homosexual. Coming out processes is one of the most important processes for a gay teenager. It usually frees the person of stress, loneliness, and depression. While heterosexual teens are worry about dating and relationships homosexual teens are usually trying to find some connection with other teens with the same feelings. They are trying to accept who they are and create positive images of what it means to be a gay person. Dr. Jack Drescher, Clinical Assistant at New York University, states that it is important for homosexual teens to come out because it “frees the person of the burden of being alone and opens a new world and new people.” He notes that new support systems emerge from this experience as well. Richard Ryan, professor at the University of Rochester stated that “In general, research shows that coming out is a good thing,” (Dallas).  Researchers found that 87% of “out” men felt less angry and had an increase of self-esteem. (Dallas). It seems that homosexuals and heterosexual go through the same basic struggles of teenage life but it is obvious that homosexuals may in fact have a few more obstacles to go through. Coming out may be the least of the problems, especially in the years where teen suicide is on a rise.

There has been an increase in bullying in the last few years. Bullies usually look for the outcast of the school. They attack the ones that show a sign of insecurity and push buttons until the victim can’t candle it anymore and end up taking their own life. Many teens feel depressed and have no one to talk to or they don’t have anyone who can help them. If heterosexual teens have these feelings, then image how a teen who identifies as homosexual feels when society is constantly judging them. Gay teens are 40% more likely to attempt suicide according to an article written by Robert Li Kitts. The pressure of being different lies on the shoulders of gay teens. When society looks down upon you and your family feels that homosexuality is wrong, it can be enough for a teen to take his or her life.  In the book Oddly Normal, John Schwarts’ son attempted to commit suicide. He said that “he would have never known that there was so much bothering him, that if he had been out maybe none of it would have happened.” Then again, Jaiden Bell was out and he had a decent life until he started being bullied. In an article I found from Psychology Today, Rachel Meadow made the statement that closeted gay news anchors need to take responsibility and “come out” (Niose). To make sense of the statement Harvey Milk, a former gay activist, was quoted to bring better meaning to Meadow’s words:

I would like to see every gay doctor come out, every gay lawyer, every gay architect come out, stand up and let that world know. That would do more to end prejudice overnight than anybody would imagine.

Meadow was just reiterating a point that was made years before. She felt that if more professional people came out as gay then the world would have no choice but to get over the prejudice of gays. Maybe in a bigger picture, it could bring hope to those teens that struggle with being gay. Maybe it would lessen the negative views and paint a picture where gay teen are able to see their lives played out through others who demonstrated courage. Heterosexuals have an abundance of role models or people to look up to. Everywhere you look you can see the happiness and success of straight people. What Meadow was pointing out was that role models could be established by successful gays standing up and speaking out. Meadow wasn’t the only one who help support and start a movement to establish a more realist and equal future for gays.

In recent years, there have been marriage laws passed, more and more political support, and even more role models taking a spot in the public eye. Just recently Anderson Cooper came out and made a strong stance on helping to support the gay youth. There have been efforts made to help out the stress and depression that gay teens go through. The “It Gets Better Project” and the “Trevor Project” have made a mark on supporting teens who struggle with depression and suicidal thoughts. There have been organizations like “NOH8” and “Stop Bullying” that made efforts to stop bullying in schools. So that being said, are homosexuals and heterosexuals different? There is no strong biological proof that there is a difference, but it is shown that growing up there is one. Homosexuals and heterosexuals grow up differently because of how the environment and society play a role in their lives. For homosexuals there is a little more controversy hanging over their heads. There are more and more support organizations to help change that so that maybe in the future, society will no longer focus on homosexuals. After all, in the past minorities struggled and developed different form the majority due to societies influence. History does repeat its self. Like I had said before, Jaiden Bell wasn’t truly different enough to be bullied or looked down upon. He had his own interest that went against social norms and after his death you find that more and more people realize that there was nothing wrong with it all long. Everyone grows up different, and likes different things. Until science says otherwise, the decision on whether homosexuals and heterosexuals are truly different is left up to one’s own opinion.