One Who Knows

         At six thirty in the morning three deadbeats were sitting at a corner table at the Wade Hampton Waffle House eating biscuits and gravy gave us stares as Gabe, Officer Jimmy and I entered.  Maybe they didn’t like our shiny detective badges on our belts and the uniform.  I really didn’t like deadbeats and I decided to call these three Big Ugly, Country Compost, and White Trash only because I felt intelligence skipped these specimens of human beings and my visual disdain was noted by them.  Overwhelming me, I desired that none of them become my son-in-law, then I paused in my thoughts remembering what my mentor and retired partner Roger said that being a cop hardens the soul. 

         As Gabe, Officer Jimmy, and I passed their table, Big Ugly who was facing us threw a napkin that landed in front of my feet.  I called him Big Ugly because there wasn’t anything pretty about him and I wondered if he had been inbred with a hairy aunt and a crossdressing uncle?  I wasn’t sure how he was able to eat with the broken, yellow gopher tooth that touched the top of his lower lip. 

         I bent down, picked up the napkin, walked over to Big Ugly and was about to put the napkin on his tray when he stood up to face me.  I didn’t give him the chance to get up all the way when I pressed the tip of my thumb into his mandibular, a pressure point  behind the ear, causing him to wince in pain and to sit back down.  I have always liked this submission method which I feel is more powerful than the hand submission method which I used when I handcuffed individuals.  I also wasn’t in the mood to do a Rodney King on him which isn’t professional police work. 

         County Compost decided to make his move but Gabe wasn’t having any of that, neither was officer Jimmy. 

         Praz closed the cash register with a loud bang.  “Yo, did you popo want to order or did you only want to talk to the manager?” 

         I grabbed the counter to restrain my disgust for this kid’s mouth because the  word popo for police really bothered me.  “We don’t want anything and we’re here to see the manager.” 

         Praz hoisted his pants with one hand and kept it there.  “Hey Simon, popo is  looking for you.  If you’re going downtown I have some relatives in there who can keep you company.”   

         I prayed to God, that Rena does not get asked out by an idiot like this and I have a feeling he had taken up residence in Greenville County Detention Center sometime in his existence.  I could only gather within my own conclusions that if Praz had any children out there I was hoping they were far away.

         Gabe and I stepped to the side and I watched as Simon popped his head up, acknowledged being called and propped the mop up against the wall.  Simon slowly made his way to the counter adjusting his tie and belt hoping to make a good impression on us.  Simon was a short man with graying hair, a crooked smile, and ear hair that could’ve been hiding who knows what and he looked frazzled to say the least. 

         I eyed Praz as he tried to tilt his cap a little more.  “Simon, I’m Detective Sadie Markerson and this is my partner, Detective Gabe Bromley and Officer Jimmy O’Connor.” 

         Simon continued to adjust his tie and belt with shaky hands.  “I’m Simon Raines, what can I do for you officers?” 

         I took the picture of our suspect out of the folder and showed it to Simon.  “Is this girl a regular?”