Advertising Awards

    When did commercials become entertainment?  Last year I went to a Super Bowl party where people ran to the bathroom while the players were on the field!  But some of us still consider advertisers to be pests.  Advertising may be a necessary evil, like insects and scavengers, but at least cockroaches are less prolific.  The AdAwards is dedicated to honoring those commercials that succeed in being so obnoxious, irritating, and distasteful that they trigger a lunge for the 'mute' button.

Here are this week's winners.

For Best Passive-Aggressive marketing strategy:

DirecTV:Cable's Conflict Box
    This series of ads seems to suggest that the key to peace and civility in a family is the ability to record up to 6 shows at the same time.  In each one a giant error message interferes with a family as they try to sleep, retrieve a lost ball, or even sit on the couch.  They are stuck with this message for as long as they have cable.  This is because family members try to record 2 programs at once, which cable will not allow.  The reason that this series of ads take the prize is the father.  In all 4 ads, the father explains the conflict to his children or neighbors (and the viewer).  But he can't seem to discuss this topic without taking passive-aggressive jabs at his family members, particularly his wife.  We see him evolve from a passive-aggressive dickhead; to a lazy, passive-aggressive, dickhead; to a total dickhead, hiding behind passive-aggression to disguise the fact that this issue, like his anger, is ridiculous and unimportant.  This family needs to replace the father before worrying about the cable.  That's the source of dysfunction.  Nothing will ever satisfy this man, he will take advantage of every petty or nonexistent inconvenience until his family gives in to every demand.  This type of person will never change, which is why he and his kind deserve to die alone.



For Most Irritating Soundtrack:

Kmart: "The Lights, The Lights, The Lights..."
    The song that introduces these commercials is irritating by the 2nd time you hear it.  So Kmart chose to use it for their Christmas ads, playing it 4 times per hour, every hour, of every day, of December, of 2012, until Christmas finally arrives.  Go F#ck yourself, Kmart.



I will post more as I write them.  I would appreciate any feedback you might have.  I don't have enough GPs to set up an automatic award, but I may gift some if I find a review particularly helpful.