Dear Agony

I know you won't let go of me
You're my greatest faceless enemy
Though all you do is hurt me
I guess misery loves company...
And you won't let me leave you lonely....
Though sometimes you speak so soothingly....
I almost don't want you to leave me....
I'll suffer so very slowly....
Because you know just what to say to me.....
To keep me here, knowingly.
Because this is just the way it must be.

I have no choice
Because your voice...
It keeps me here...
So I can not fear.
The most difficult thing...
Is the ring ring in my ear...
Telling me to let go
That I don't belong here...
But I feel instantly drawn
To the bloody dawn.

And, though darkly inspired
I have to desired
A life beyond my own.
But you will hold me till death
And I know I will let you
Because I know I am weak inside,
Though tough outside
A small child hidden

Crying....crying to get out.
Crying to be free
Crying....though something much less then glee
Maybe Greed?
No....I know not of the sin.
I do not want anything
I know is beyond my reach.

Dear Agony
Keep them away from me
Put up a wall
Don't let it fall
Not fall, nor crumble, under them.
Their lies, their hate, their glares...
Keep them away, stay aware.

I know they'll hurt me
That's why I don't want them in.
I won't let them in
And I know you won't either.

So Dear Agony
That's why I won't let you leave me...
Because without you, no one would understand me.
You, and only you, know the real me.
Maybe because you made me this way...
Or maybe because you stay with me every day...
I honestly don't know

But I know this feeling will grow...
But I don't know what this feeling is.
Maybe I find pleasure in the pain
Or maybe because you let me laugh at other people's pain.
Whatever the reason
I know there's gotta be a reason
So why can't I detect
Or connect....
With anyone else but you?