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If You're Not Too Careful, You Just Might Learn Something, Just Ask "JESUS GIRL" ! |
JESUS GIRL God has an upside-down hierarchy in His kingdom. He uses the simple to confound the so-called wise. He lifts the humble to dizzying heights where they showcase his glory. Such is the often the case of His children. One child in particular being Luna my granddaughter. You see God knows how to reach people best, even if they fail by our evangelical standards. Do to old hurts that deeply wounded my spirit and patterned my flesh, I struggle with receiving criticism and instruction. I have become much better at it and God is not finished with me yet. The reason it takes some people longer than others to conform to the likeness of Christ is because he is removing layers, one at a time. This is a lengthy process. The layers are like old bandages that were never changed. The dried blood, surrounding flesh and nerves, and the bandage itself had fused to become quite a mess. In order to heal it involves pain. But God knows how much we can handle and he tailors the procedure to one we can handle. Where I used to see migraine-inducing dysfunction, I now see gardens of delight ripe for planting. Where I once saw basket cases, I now see fledgeling creatures within an unshakeable nest of life, that nest being the cupped hands of the ever-loving and provident hand of God. I have a thorn in my flesh, one among several. This particular one is imbedded deep in my heart and mind. I used to fear it, but now glory in it. For as it is pulled slowly to the surface by the Almighty God, it is being healed from the inside. I find myself in the awkward position of not liking people on a whole, and yet being burdened for them and loving them. What I mean by that is I am deeply disturbed by the goings on in this world, the ever-spreading callousness of humanity and all the consequences I see and hear about on a daily basis. I have been hurt the most by the very ones I trusted the most, so I became judgmental and distrusting, which is crippling to anyone but paralyzing to one called to ministry. But God finds a way in , even if it is in a crack of very thick skin. My granddaughter Luna just turned 4 years old. She is my only granddaughter and the daughter of my firstborn and only daughter. Luna's parents never married. Her father was too immature, and lacked the desire to be a fatherly role crucial to Luna's development. Luna's parents separated, and Luna rarely sees her father. God prompts me to speak truth and light into Luna's heart and life to fill the void that only God can fill.I know because He continues to do this for me. I was victimized by a maternal grandfather. It is doubtful I will ever have closure in my mortal life. I believe this because my mother is so damaged by this now deceased man's actions, that she to this day denies what happened to me as a child as well as her own experiences. I know the hurt of being rejected when you reveal a truth. I know what it feels like to guard your heart and keep it in the dark where all seems safe. I know what it feels like to have my heartstrings plucked and even torn out of place by the mercy of God, often by a channel that is of a diminutive stature. I have spoken to Luna many times of the grace, mercy, and abiding Love of God. I have witnessed her distresses, frustrations, and disappointments melt under the healing hand of God. I have seen the bondages I thought impossible for one so young to even possess, be broken one chain link at a time and each time I have a moment where I am left breathless and instant- instantaneously hurled into the whirlwind of the Holy Spirit. Luna's father has a half-sister born to his father later in life. Therefore Luna's aunt is only a young child herself almost the same age as Luna. This "aunt", or playmate of Luna's, has baggage that makes her at times seem unlovable or intolerable to the point of being labeled a brat. I have almost no contact with Luna's father's side of the family but often hear the going's on in this child's life from Luna's conversations. Yesterday Luna was in the minivan with me. She was listening to a well-worn cassette tape of the Donut Man singing ,"He that is in us is greater than he that is in the world." She also listened again to the song about the man built his house on the rock versus the foolish man. In the quiet interim between tape sides, said to me the following: "Grandma, Jesus is the rock and the devil is the sand. I want to be a Jesus Girl. That's why I'm leaving my buckles on in my car seat. Now Jesus will be proud of me." In the past,Luna rebelliously removed the buckles in her car seat. This usually occurred in the moving vehicle much to the dismay of the driver and nearby police cruisers.I praised Luna for her good behavior. She then said the following: "Jilly (her aunt-playmate) always says "No" when her mommy tells her to do things. Jilly is a brat Grandma. Mommy used to like Jilly and we had fun but nobody likes Jillian anymore." Then Luna's eye's opened wide with concern and she said in a pleading voice, "But Grandma!, Jilly is my family! I have to tell her about Jesus so she can be a Jesus Girl! She's living in the sand and she's sinking Grandma!" Luna was in full-panic mode over the burden of the soul of her young relative. And yet days and even weeks pass where I do not witness the timeless love story of Christ to anyone and there is no excuse.Is it any wonder the Lord Jesus Christ tells us unless we come as a child, we shall not see the kingdom of God? Where I once anguished over Luna's situation, the Lord showed me Luna clothed in purest white at the altar next to her groom Jesus Christ, a true Jesus Girl.God has no illegitimate sons or daughters, in Christ we are all heirs to God's kingdom. God uses the smallest to enlarge the hearts of the masses. This grandchild of mine who I once saw as a victim of modern society, is the willing vessel of God's message to the unlovable. He took a child's pain and replaced it with a healing and hopeful message of love and light. Where I was once stressed by Luna's very naughty behavior in church and at home, I now glory even more in her life, even the hurts. Because it is what gave her a compassionate heart to reach out to the unlovable and hurting. God takes the ugly and gives it breathtaking beauty. "Jesus Girl", I pondered the reality of it. When I was trying to use a works-based methods of handling Luna's needs, I failed. But when I asked the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit to reveal their loving personhood to Luna, I gained ground. Luna was absorbing healing medicine into her heart and soul. And while Luna had not been sexually abused as I was, she has had deep emotional hurts for one so young." Yet she is being molded and giving up the flesh in a more loving and trusting way to the hands of the Potter than I, the so-called "mature" christian was. "But we have this treasure in clay pots", to be sure. To be teachable and moldable and loving is vital to our relationship with God and our fellow man. And so I ask myself if I am being a "Jesus Girl" when I am faced with a decision to show love and light or not. 2 Corinthians 4:6- For God, who said, "Let there be light in the darkness," has made this light shine in our hearts so we could know the glory of God that is seen in the face of Jesus Christ." |