An 18+ poem about a pair of underwear that give me the power to overcome my fears. |
-Narcissistic Underpants- by Keaton Foster I feel great Like chocolate cake Like a ripe prom date Maybe even like a molested great ape In all things ridiculous I do indeed believe Excessiveness in any form is never enough. Words like these I often stammer Truths like these repeatedly I hammer Metaphorical shit like this I force Into the heads of those listening Expressionism devoid of any contraception Bare-backing it all day and night long Impregnating the masses with my appeal Without a physical touch and the associated stickiness. All that I am quickly becomes theirs Sick I know, inside I always dare go I am not afraid, nor will I ever be As long as I am dressed appropriately I know that I will be just fine As right as rain on any Sunday afternoon As content as a baby suckling upon its mothers teat . So please listen well and let me further explain The preposterous ways in which I mean Today, here, upon this stage built from a page To be read and not verbally expressed I am wearing my special narcissistic underpants Which give me the power of excessive expressiveness. Self-admiration by the truck load Self-centeredness by the absolute shitload Thus the power to say stupid things That make not a God damned bit of sense To any other human being but me I can step in my own crap all day long And not for a second to me will it smell When I am wearing my narcissistic underpants. I feel as perfect as I am sure that I am A fool of a god amongst men A lyrical, poetic, phonetic Mozart A cross between Edgar Allan Poe And Kurt Cobain, pre shotgun blast Ok well, maybe not. I have more to say than anyone else And I am sure that everyone is listening And if they are not, well damn them For being so flagrantly ignorant If they would only hear with If they would only understand Then maybe what is being said Would seep into their thickened heads Saving them from a world Of minutia and mundaness. Showing them all that it is I That rises in the east and sets in the west That it is me and my words that they must Pay any and all homage to My narcissistic underpants give me the strength To believe in any and all of my own bullshit When I am wearing them I can do no wrong When I am wearing them I am abundantly right… Narcissistic Underpants Written by Keaton Foster Copyright © 2012. |