wishes and nightmares

She's extremely close to snapping,
Her heart and body already torn.
Her fingers always tapping,
She regrets the day she was born.

Sleep helps her forget things,
But its a rarity these days.
Each swipe always stings,
The best part of the pain stays.

Bad memories haunt her bedroom,
Although her only wish is to be perfect.
She only has one heirloom,
The only thing she can truly respect.

The longing for a better life,
For her mother also struggled.
Passing down the strife,
Soon a young girl was also troubled.

When she's in constant despair,
The cuts get even more deep.
She wishes she could wake up from her nightmare,
Yet she forgets, she isn't asleep.

She's lost her sense of flight,
Her wings once spread and she flew to the highest of highs.
She might not make it home tonight,
She's failed herself, and once again she cries.

She's already planned it in her mind,
A fool proof map of death.
Her body, they will not find,
She closes her eyes and takes one last, long breath.