Saint Ashly Jugs

          Saint Ashly Jugs was obsessed with self-gratification, yet
    desperately needed a purpose other than being a rich party girl.
    Ashly knew the truth about oppressed people
    and she would save them.
    It was the devaluing and objectifying of
    liberalism; that oppressed the poor.  It was up to Saint Ashly Jugs
    to save the poor and ugly and stupid from objectification.
   
            "What is it that we mean when we speak
            of contraception? It is being free from the
            the vicious circle of reproducing more stupid
            people. To live in bitter stupidity is not a life,
            three generations of idiots is enough."
            the Saint carved these words into her Jaccuzi.
   
    Saint Ashly had taken a vow under her yum-yum tree to fight for liberalism
    even in countries that did not know what the word meant.
    She was a very dedicated idealist. After spending many years as a
    porn star and spokes woman for a lingerie company: Happy Nickers,
    she fell down at the feet of Denzel Washington; the most quoted
    enlightened celebrity in Hollywood.

        "My life is meaningless sex and drugs and lingerie commercials."

    She sobbed her puffy face into his prayer rug. Denzel held her puffy face
    with his black hands:

            "You are still a virgin for you have deprived yourself of the revery of
            a tax shelter. Give your heart to liberal humanitarian causes
            and you will be pure again."

    Denzel Washington was renowned for his charismatic speeches.
    And used his celebrity status to inspire many people to get involved
    in foreign affairs, such as, mosquito netting for the poor in Canada.

            "God spoke to me under my yum-yum tree.
            He told me abortion is a sacrament, because God
            wants everyone in Heaven." the pron star exclaimed.

    Denzel raised his hands above Ashly's puffy face and cried out:

              "Let this porn star be your instrument Lord!
              You purged the world with a great flood
              and you promised us Armageddon before the Rapture.
              Ashly Jugs will bring contraception to every nation of the world
              and fill your heavenly kingdom!"

      Saint Jugs shed many tears as she inspired many abortions.
      "If only more people could see that liberalism is the path to God;
      the planet would be a greener place."

      Reflections: We live in blind denial of the poor and oppressed
                        and leave overpopulation to chance.
                        Is it not more merciful to offer free contraception on
                        demand?


      (*)(*)