Sucks being a cliche

Its kind of funny how I ended up here:  I typed in words that I put in the description-  divorced midde aged single mother and lo and behold I ended up on this site.  Life can be so jarring, unrelenting, off-putting, occasionally bullying, which is what led me to typing in a certain set of words and me feeling oddly compelled to write this.  Any of you that are on this website I'm sure understand the cathartic value of writing stuff down.  The thing is, I haven't done that for a long, long time so I'm not sure what I'm about to subject you to.

Joan's last year (in a rambling, stream of consciousness, grammatically and structurally horrific sort of way):
I'm just coming off of what is easily the worst year of my life after a decade of some pretty awful years-  mother of four children ages ten to twenty (lots of writing material there, lol), married twenty-eight years, the last ten of which my husband drank heavily- he started after I found out I was pregnant with my fourth child at the age of forty (not excusing the fool but he had a lot going on that year), realized that I was living my worst nightmare because I grew up with an alcoholic father, started marriage counseling several years ago, found out he was having an affair with my brother's psycho ex-wife (I'm not just saying that, she is truly crazy), sat in utter disbelief as the asshole turned to the marriage counselor and said he wanted to start divorce counseling (wait...you're fucking asking ME for a divorce????), sat in utter disbelief when he tested positive for opiates after a surprise drug test the judge ordered- then several weeks later the sample was lost for verification which led to the judge reluctantly allowing him to continue to live in the home, sat in utter disbelief as another judge gave me a month to list the house I had renovated five years ago- had lived in that neighborhood for over twenty years and put my heart and soul into that house, came to the sad realization that the sale of that house was far harder on me emotionally than the divorce, just moved from a house that was virtually new to a hundred and fifty year old rental with very old plumbing/septic/well and all the inconveniences that entails, a stinkbug infestation and the stench of cat pee because previously this house housed a lot of felines.  A lot.  And there are rumors that a former tenant also had a tarantula collection.  Yeah.

  I have been slapped repeatedly with the mean reality of the job market for a fifty one year old woman who has been out of the job market since pregnant with my twenty year old, have seen proceeds of the house sale- the only thing I have to live on at the moment because the divorce isn't final and he isn't paying me a thing- get decimated by almost half in less than  two months time, have realized that if I don't get a job asap my children and myself will learn the true meaning of poverty for the first time in our lives and here I sit, writing to no one in particular, instead of being out somewhere, looking for a job, any stupid job.  I've tried the door to door thing, the online thing, the temp agency thing, the tell everyone I know thing, finding free classes to teach me stuff that may help me thing and its hard to come to grips with how much different things are than the last time I was in the job market.  Getting a job was easy then-  I had gotten every job that I had interviewed for.  Now, I've had exactly two interviews and my first rejections.  I was happy to get those interviews but the rejection part is admittedly tough.

Problem is, I sometimes forget that I'm my age.  I often think of myself as a young, enthusiastic, eager to learn new stuff type person but I guess I don't quite look the part (by the way, ageism is a real problem).  My biggest issue however, is the twenty year gap in my employment history.  I hate to say it but as much as I thought it was a privilege to stay home with my kids, I am telling my kids (three of them are girls), don't ever become so dependent for so long on someone else- always keep your foot in the door and your skills up to date.  I would never want my kids to be in the same predicament I find myself in now.  We lost everything- all of our savings, our assets, our equity in the house, everything because of his drinking, our divorce and my inability to get a job that can support us in what is the one of the most expensive places to live in the country, North Jersey (wish I could move, but can't).  These days, such a terribly common event.

So I'm thinking that its not such a bad thing, while wallowing in discouragement, to hone my skills writing, start playing the piano again (and maybe get the confidence up to teach some beginner students) and assess my options.
I just have to be quick about it. 

All the above is what led to the title of this "item".  What a cliche.  There are so many divorced middled aged single unemployed mothers out there (and yes, of course men and young people, old people, all sorts of people who find themselves where they didn't expect to be).  Not all of them escape reality by writing on a site they accidentally came across though and since I feel a bit better now than I did when I started writing this, I guess I should consider myself lucky.

When I read what I have written, it comes across as self-pitying but that really isn't what I'm feeling.  Don't get me wrong, I have my little pity moments but most of the time, I am fully aware that there are a lot of people- as close as my neighbors as well as world-wide, that have it much worse than I do.  I truly do count my blessings: four sometimes annoying, often funny, constantly filling me with awe, always teaching me stuff, endlessly needy, occasionally scaring the shit out of me, kids. Right now we are relatively healthy, well-fed and housed (if stinkbug hunts have become part of the fabric of our family history, so be it!) and I know that I am capable of taking care of my family, I just have to figure out a way.

For any person who happens across this and takes the time to read it, thank you.  I hope you don't regret it.  I used to write when I was kid and always found it a tortuous, yet compelling process.  I used to know the numerous grammatical dos and don'ts, started flouting many of the rules of writing, forgot the rules and now I simply don't care anymore. 

I haven't written fiction since I was a child but reading a few things on this site has me excited to wake up a part of my brain that has been dormant for a long time. 
Hmmm....divorced middle aged single unemployed mother who starts writing.  As if THAT'S not a cliche. 
Sheesh.