Not Your Typical Furry Story

Click-tap-click-tap. Keyboards were worked to their fullest potential within the fourth floor office. The pitiful, empty rumors of working in a cubicle have proven to be true for some, but not for Ray Fargus. The fox quite enjoyed the privacy and punching of numbers into the computer, while occasionally looking and toying around with various knick knacks around his workplace. After finishing up a work sheet and quickly selling ten more products than his original quota, he opened up a second window on his computer and wrote a blog on his favorite social website about his joy of office life.

I remember my high school’s Computer Applications class like it was yesterday. Each day I would enter early and type at sixty words a minute to my favorite tune on the radio, and my teacher would constantly tell me, “Fargus, someday you’d be an employers dream come true. Heck, I wouldn’t be surprised if the first business you start becomes popular within a month.” Though I never got around to the second thing he said, I do get the impression that I’m my boss’s favorite employee. Three times already he asked if I’d like a promotion, but kindly I denied. The pays great enough as it is, but really the comforting feeling I have here is being confined to this cubicle. Why you ask, well, I don’t exactly know. I guess it could be because it’s my own type of personal space, or kind of like a small private room where I may reflect my personality without being judged; pretty much like the room back at my apartment. It was a home away from home. Most of my friends call me a real boring fox, and they’re probably right. Oh well, if being boring is a crime, send me to jail, I’ll continue to be boring there. Though, a scrawny, gaunt, pacifist fox like me most likely wouldn’t survive a day in the brutish environment. Uuuggh, I just get the shivers. Anyways, there’s not much I plan to do after work. Probably just read, eat, and continue to write poetry. I’m almost done with Watterchild777’s request buy the way. That’s right, I haven’t forgotten about you ;D.

“Hey Ray whatcha doin’?”

The fox nearly jumped out of his seat as his enthusiastic friend surprised him. Quickly he minimized the window of his blog. Heart pounding, he turned to face him with a smile; hoping on the inside that the ferret didn’t catch what he was doing.

“Erm, hey Kaz. You um-you-finished with the files I gave you?”

“Oh yeah, here, I’m done for the day actually.”

Ray was wide eyed with amazement. “Wow, this is a first! Since when did you ever finish your work early?”

The ferret took a sip of his coffee mug, “since it became the day that I’ve summoned the courage to ask pretty miss thang over there on a date.”

Ray stood up and looked to the direction Kaz pointed. In her own cubical talking to a customer sat a grey and white furred female ferret. Her velvet eyes focused on her computer screen while her soft-well manicured paws moved rapidly across the keyboard. Looking back to Kaz, Ray withheld a chuckle. The male ferret leaned against the cubical and released a mirthful sigh. His eyes sparkled with hope, while his body continued to melt against the cubical surface.

Suddenly, realization came to Ray as to who the female ferret was. “Wait a minute, Zora? B-b-but you can’t ask Zora on a date, she doesn’t like anyone.”

Kaz waved his paw, “Dun worry foxy, I know that she wants me; I see it in her eyes each time I pass by her. She might not smile or say anything, infact she looks like she wants to throw a spear straight to my head. But I know she wants me darn it. And there’s nothin’ ta get between me and her; and nothin’ a little Kazy charm couldn’t handle.”

“Er, what? Do you think that’s such a good idea, especially since we signed those employee conduct agreement forms two days ago?”

Kaz’s eye brow shot up. “What are you talking about? I’m not going to lustfully touch her or anything. I just want to talk.”

“Actually, if you would’ve read you might’ve known. The policy also includes any verbal phrases or words used that makes the receiver feel physically insecure or violated also counts as negative employee conduct.”

“Why ya got ta ruin my groove for Ray?”

“I’m not trying to ruin your groove. I’m trying to help you keep your job.”

“Don’t worry bra’,” Kaz ruffled the fox’s head, “I’ll play it cool for now, and afterwards I just might help you wrangle in Cynthia.”

“Cynthia,” Ray blushed.

Now it was Kaz’s turn to chuckle, “uh huh, Cynthia. That vivacious vixen you’ve been too much of a chicken to ask out has had her eye on you for some time…I think. I know this game, see. They want you to ask them out while they’re still young and pretty. Otherwise throughout the years they go home, alone with a bucket of ice cream and lay on the couch watchin’ chick flicks and romance movies all day.”

“Whatever you say,” Ray shrugged, “just don’t say anything stupid.”

Kaz patted his head reassuringly, “Come on, it’s me your talkin’ to.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of,” Ray whispered while keeping his gaze fixated on his friend. Kaz had walked to Zora’s cubicle and leaned over; showing a radiant white smile. Knocking on the computer to get her attention, he winked. It was humorous to see two opposites interacting with each other. It was like seeing the sun and moon, light and dark, any kind of polar opposite not made for each other doing battle. As he smiled and spoke through blissful eyes, she leered back and frowned; the fiery barrier around her scorched up any of cupid’s arrows that were shot at her.

Suddenly, her eyes shot wide open and she sat up in shock from Kaz’s final words. Then, she grinned. Kaz’s disposition grew brighter with joy from seeing this, but unfortunately he was oblivious to her true intentions.

Ray wanted to go over and intervene, but was a bit of a coward when getting in between two other beasts. Zora stood up, taking a sip of her own coffee mug and sniffing the steam exiting from the brim. Then, without warning, she tossed the boiling liquid in the clean shaven face of Kaz. The ferret’s blood curdling scream was heard throughout the entire office, which attracted nearly every beast to look in the direction. Zora nodded in triumph while Kaz writhed in pain, flopping about like a fish. Ray covered his own face with his paws; feeling the sizzling pain from where he sat. Before he could make a move to help his friend, three others were already on it. After lifting him up, Kaz shooed the co-workers off and went back to Ray’s cubicle. To be of some assistance, Ray wet a rag with water from a bottle.

“Here, use this.”

Kaz winced and grunted, “thanks, that burned like hell.”

“I warned you didn’t I? Don’t say anything stupid. But no, you never listen to me, and this is what you deserve.”

Kaz scoffed, “well excuse me boring bottom, I was only trying ta get us some fun after work; but I guess you’d rather be stuffed in your apartment.”

“Your darn right I would. It’s a Friday and I just want to relax.”

Slam! All eyes turned to the manager’s office door. Out of it waddled a husky raccoon who didn’t look the least bit happy. Stomping over to Ray’s cubicle, Kaz cringed in the corner.

“Martin, front and center!”

Kaz apprehensively emerged from out the corner and obeyed his boss’ orders. “Yes sir?”

“Your job here is accounting, not to flirt with females! So you better have a reason for leaving your post!”

“I w-was done with m-my duties s-sir.”

“When I was in the war a rat named private Milliken finished his mission prematurely and decided to work overtime! And because of mortars bombarding his post he now eats everything through a straw! Do I make myself clear?”

“Y-yes sir.”

“I can’t hear you Martin!”

“Y-y-yes sir!”

“Punch out and get out of my building! And stop fraternizing with Fargus! I don’t want you corrupting my star employee!”

“Yes sir!” Trembling and not wasting a minute, Kaz packed his things from his cubicle and made his way out the door. Other employees stifled giggles or laughed out loud, but were immediately settled down by their bosses glare. Now Ray felt sorry for his once enthusiastic friend and thought of how he could make things better.



* * * * *



After work, Ray walked at a quick pace to his car at the very back of the parking lot, which was the only real exercise he did all day. Clutching his briefcase against his bosom and his heart beating with excitement, he couldn‘t wait to get home. The plan he had developed for Kaz warmed his insides, and he was able to do it in the comfort of his room. Afterwards he would be able to splurge in the creative art of poetry and entertainment from television.

“Ray!”

The fox turned around and was shocked to be greeted by the mad marching figure of Zora. The vengeful velvet eyes stabbed painfully at him like knives. Frozen in fear and shyness, he stopped where he was; only a tails length away from his car.

“What’s your hurry, I just want to talk,” she said uncandidly.

“Er-Zora, about what Kaz said, I--.”

Ray yelped as she shoved him roughly against his car. Her flaming touch burned through his courage, leaving only a trembling whimpering fox. His reflection through her eyes made him feel even more frightened. It was like the dark pupils had a mission to claim his soul, and she was here to collect it.

The Jill firmly held Ray down, digging her claws deep into his chest. “Now shut up and don’t say a word you cretin. I saw you talking to Kaz before he came up to me, and I don’t know what you guys said. But if I find out you had anything do with what he told me today, I’ll tear your ears off and shove your tail down your throat. I never expected him to say something so foul. How am I supposed to remain interested in him if he continues to do what he did today?”

Suddenly, Ray was no longer frightened. Instead he quizzically furrowed his brow. “Wait, your intere--.”

“I said shut up,” she slammed him down on the car. Yes, I’m interested in him, but if I show him I’m interested, then he’ll know he could have me and lose interest in me. But if I show him I’m not interested then he’ll have more interest for me. I just don’t want him to talk to me the way he did anymore, so I wont lose interest in him. Got it?”

Ray nodded.

“Good, I’m glad we could have this chat. But don’t you dare tell him any of this! But do tell him I’m sorry for throwing my coffee at his face. And if he talks about me again, tell him to stop with the dirty pickup lines. I like movies, and ice cream.” Zora winked. “You’re a real good listener, and kinda cute in a weird way. One last thing, I can’t wait to read that poem I requested. Bye.”

Wincing as she release her grip, Ray remained dumbfounded while clutching his briefcase. Zora casually walked over to her own car with a pleasant smile on her face, merrily swaying her own tail back and fourth under her suit.

Wide eyed and with his fur still sticking out, Ray was only able to let out three words before putting his briefcase down beside him. “What just happened.”