The waves of God's love

Oh Father!,
Search out my heart!
Sift through my motivations!
Let not my heart of hearts, which earnestly yearns for you,
Hesitate to enter in your purging furnace,
Where only the desires truly seeking to please you,
To delight in the beauty you have created,
To rejoice in the resounding words of truth you have bestowed,
Can rise purified to new heights,
Leaving behind the desires that weigh down,
That can only lead along avenues of vanity,
Roads that lead into endless dreary landscapes,
Where your smiling heart becomes ever more faint,
Where all thoughts lead to confusion,
Where the dearth of your love leads to despair, resentment and anger,
Then the desire to strike out at something, anything.

But, can I strike out at you?
Did I not so easily allow my heart to be diverted and subverted?
Was I not reluctant to place my heart on your altar?
Did I not know that the pounding of the waves against my ego,
Would soften my rough edges and allow me,
To gently wash up on the shores of your warm sea,
A sea of your love, lapping our hearts for eternity?