Having your heart ripped out and handed to you. |
It's too late, you can't take it back,it has already been said. You said it yourself , "Shit, I am better off dead." You were gone, alone & lost. It took control & you let it, you wanted her at any cost. Was the rush worth all the pain? Yet every day, you would chase 'her' again & again. Not really caring whether or not it would end. You told your lies to get your way, do you really understand this is not a game everyone should play? The rules are different for each & everyone. Do you really think we are having fun? You have your little kit that you take everywhere , do you not see the others stare? They know what goes on behind that door, when is enough enough? Do you really need anymore? Can't you tell, it's not who you are! You were once the brightest star. Fast drugs, fast cars & all those stupid bitches. You were always on the look out for those fake, punk - ass snitches... You know the ones who run their mouth & shouted your business for all the world to hear, Pushing away the ones the held you dear. Their broken promises & bullshit lies. Do you know why they cut all the ties? You still don't see the damage you've caused or the hearts you broke. Maybe someday you will learn & realize it's no joke. You are stealing from the poor to feed your demons, but you can't soothe the feeling inside. It's been one jacked up ride. How long until you hit rock bottom & stop? Don't you realize you've lost everything & you're no longer on top? Scorned is the one who believed in you the longest & the most. You just had to keep going , you ripped her heart out & over a fire you began to roast. You surrounded yourself with fake ass people who didn't really care that you didn't want to be alone. Paranoia set in & you were definitely in the wrong zone. You couldn't go back & face it; face the lies you had told, the tears created by all of your shit. I bet love never crossed your mind, it is a selfish emotion, you felt like you were being timed. Rushed 'round by none other than yourself. Something you always blamed on everyone else. You would never accept that maybe all the mayhem was your fault, come on we know, we are adults. They tried to show you the turmoil you had caused, you went away, your life was paused. You say you have been sober for a few & everything around seems brand new. Now the pain you caused you have to face. You say you are hurt, why, because someone is in your place? Did you think she was going to wait? You say it was because you were high, you better pray it's not too late. Are you ready to face her anger? Her pain & maybe even resentment & a little hate? Is she worth it? Do you love her? The truth might be a fatal hit. Do you understand all that you robbed from her? You must listen & not stir. She needs her best friend & attention, Did I fail to mention, because of you, she is trying to numb the pain too. |