Heart strings

So I’m not the best patient in the world…I crib, I cringe, I fume…Why was I on God’s hospital list? Totally consumed by my broken toe, I sulked in bed and wallowed in grief. There seemed no way out of it. The world was out enjoying the chilly winters with festivities galore. I despair of ever receiving the same degree of pleasure while being amid the hub of activities than anticipating the same when I am forcibly away from it. What a dull start to the New Year! Entangled in the web of such negatives, I slipped into a sleep of oblivion.



When I limped back into the conscious realm, I caught the strums of an unfamiliarly tangy voice. Who on Earth has strayed into our home? Pleasantries and polite smiles were the last things on my to-do list. I buried myself deeper into the quilt. Just when I had believed that I was invisible, my brother stormed into my room yelling out to me, “Hey! Meet my newest pal!” I tweaked my eye out of the corner of the quilt. Viola! A pair of intense eyes jabbed me somewhere. Did I just feel a sensation worse than the one emitted by my broken toe? Or had I just smashed another organ of my body? My mind gave a numbed response. I rose like a timid phoenix, transfixed and wordless. A warm smile and a meagre handshake followed. The rest of the conversation that ensued flowed clearly past me. Before I knew, I extended my hand for another brief handshake and a bye.



I sat on my bed in an apparent state of upheaval. I could not pin down what had struck me. Clearly, the strayed stranger had pulled a string. Intuitively, I felt an instant connect…a happy connect! The festivities that hummed on without me suddenly lost all their charm. The toe that refused to respond to pain killers eased up on its own. Almost like magic! I threw the quilt aside and dragged myself to the window hoping to catch one last glimpse. There he was, caught in an animated chat, the eyes darting window wards time and again. A gush of hormones made my mood turned turtle and broke me into the most gratifying smile. That smile has remained with me ever since.



Amid this hormonal pandemonium, the mind and my super ego were still at their horrible job, that of pinching me back to reality. Byron resurrected inside my frame and echoed, “Oh, that pang, where more than madness lies, the worm that will not sleep, and never dies.” The memories of my past relationship came haunting, warning me not to jump inadvertently into a similar one. I retracted and pulled my fraying emotions together. I had to be strong. I could not give in to the fancies of the heart. The repercussions are devastating and I was a living example of that. I succumbed to the words of Byron and locked up the smile I had just acquired.



As the day dropped its curtain and the night pinned it with a star, I knew my further course of action. Dutifully, I hid in the washroom on the pretext of a shower the next day when I heard the tangy voice in the driveway, in the dresser the next, on the terrace the next. Carefully, I avoided peering into that intense pair of eyes, lest I should fall prey. I was running out of hide-outs and the tussle between the mind and the heart was escalating. I was losing. Not knowing how long I could hold my fort, I decided to gather some detail about the enigmatic guy. I perched myself next to my brother on the couch in front of the television in the living room. Not knowing where to begin my conversation from, I dug into the tub of popcorn between his knees and asked, “So how is college going?” He was so involved in the sci-fi movie playing that all I got was one word close ended response. “Ok”, he muttered. I took a deep breath and decided to take the plunge. “And how is your newest pal doing?” He looked my way this time and replied, “Oh him! He shifted base to Pune.” My battle abruptly ended. So did the flicker of hope inside me. I was doomed to live in the shadow of my erstwhile relationship.



The pain in my heart waxed and waned in the coming days. I got on with the mundane routine of everyday life without a thought. Days merged into nights and nights into days. Grades and marks turned into job appraisals and salary hikes. But the visual of those intense eyes never left me. It seemed unreal, straight out of a romantic novel, yet it was true. I dealt with it, though it dealt with me harder, taking away a part of my being. Years passed by and the scenario changed. I stepped into adulthood and assumed its responsibilities. But as we hear, the mills of fate keep working. I heard the tangy voice again, and as I raised my head from my dinner plate, I met those intense eyes again. I couldn’t believe my luck! But as my gaze shifted, I realized that this time, he had company. My strayed stranger had a lady on his arm. The pain washed me like a giant wave. I collected my wits and mustered a hello. A warm response and a smile later, the tangy voice started the introductions. “Meet my sister,” he said, pointing to the lady on his arm. Phew! I finally smiled…the same gratifying smile I had once known, and realized that sometimes a gaze is all it takes to fall in love…and the cosmos does return the drifting part of your soul to you…



Word count: 970