Where I belong

Word count 480



Where I Belong



The stars are so bright. I feel close to the Lord as I see His creations. He seems to be speaking to me through the roars of the ocean. They seem to be telling me this is where I belong. It offers me a new beginning. A place where I can recreate who I am. I would no longer have to go hungry at times so that my children can eat. Somewhere that no one knows my weaknesses, and I felt that this place wanted me here. The night breeze inviting me to remain in the calmness of the element of happiness here.



Here I don't hear the familiar sound of crowing roosters and ex husband's rumors falling upon my ears. Here I don't smell the scent of the rotting tailor decaying around me. Instead of hearing the storm  coming in through a broken window, I heard the water traveling to the shore to greet me.



I step into the foamy water. Along the edge I walk. The lights of neighboring buildings glisten much as friends welcoming me to the big safe place. A place where the problems from the hills could be left behind, a place of green warmth replacing cold white snow.



Stepping to pick up a sea shell, I think about the courage that it would take to bring my three children from the hills of Kentucky to the warm modern town of Sarasota. The shell went into the bag that I was going to take back to them. How could I not bring them here where the beauty is only met with the opportunities that the hill living would not be able to give?



I walk deeper into the water. The smell is so strong of salt. There are no sides to swim to, no life guard, but I still feel safer than I could ever remember. I knew that this is where me and my children were meant to be.



My new love and best friend walks to the water's edge and puts his arms around me. He kisses me, and asks me when I would join him here. My heart hoping to be able to returning in a couple of weeks with my family, but knowing that right now I do not have the courage.



That was in 2004, and I have since visited five other times to the state of Florida. Always afraid to start over without family. My daughter began to want to live with her dad. It wasn't long until she did.



Now I made my way to where I belong. My sons have seen the ocean, played music, and happier than I could imagine.



When I visit the ocean, I make a wish that my teenage daughter will find the calling to be with us.  One night at the beach has changed my life for the better.