Lesson 2 - Assignment 1

The Jazz Festival
By Connie Biddle

POV is Sheila, the wife and mother
Joe is Sheila’s husband
Joey is their eight-year-old son.
Angie is their six-year-old daughter.


Rewrite with Joey, the eight-year-old son, as the POV.

“Give it back, Angie! I’m telling Mom.” Joey could not figure Angie out lately. His little sister had changed overnight. She used to follow him around like a puppy dog, hanging on his every word, but since she started school, she had been acting like a little turd.

With a conniving, uppity look, Angie shouted back. “Go ahead. I can play with your old Frisbee if I want to. Mom won’t do anything. See if I care.”

“Okay kids, get your stuff and get in the car. We’re ready to go.”

Joey dashed out the screen door, letting it slam in Angie’s face. “Mom, Angie won’t give me my Frisbee.”

“Joe, we’re ready to go if you’ll put the cooler in the car for me. Angie, Joey, you two had better settle down right now.”

“Mommy, Joey hit me with the door on purpose,” Angie whined as tears welled up in her big blue eyes.

“But Mom” Joey’s plea fell on unhearing ears, as Angie stuck out her tongue and looked cross-eyed at him. Jumping into the SUV after her, Joey yanked the Frisbee out of her tiny hands.

With sugar-dripping words, Joey quickly apologized. “Angie, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were right behind me.” Joey could play this game, too.

Angie started screaming like Joey was killing her. Mom jumped out of the front seat and yanked open the back door. With her mouth almost clamped shut, Joey could barely hear the words, “Get in the front seat beside your Dad right now!”

Wow, this was the best thing Joey could have hoped for. Dad was taking the whole scene in stride and turned to wink at him as he slid into the front seat. The air conditioning felt like heaven blowing right into his face. Things had turned out pretty good after all. They were on their way to Waterfront Park to hear the Jazz Festival. Mom always wanted to go every year, but Dad usually talked her out of it because it was so hot. It was okay. Mom packed a picnic lunch, fried chicken this time, and she fixed a bag of old bread for him and Angie to feed to the ducks.



4. Was the story much different? Was the scene emphasized more, or was it emphasized less? Did the meaning of the story change?

Although the basic elements of the story remain the same, telling it from Joey's viewpoint place the emphasis on his reaction to things happening. This particular scene was emphasized much more. We get his side of the story so things important to his mother are not important to him, but things happening to him are much more important. I do not believe the meaning of the story will change all that much except we will know how the events affect Joey rather than how they affect his mother.

One problem I did find and I'm not sure why...I kept switching to first person a few times and had to rewrite. Maybe I'm an eight-year-old at heart...LOL.