Paid, Laid, Out the Door

Paid, Laid, Out the Door
By: Toni Erol     

written January 2004

My name is Toni Erol; I am a woman, mother and hooker extraordinaire. I would like to start by defining a hooker. Some people are offended by that word. I used to wonder why. In my opinion it is fear, fear of oppression. I do not accept such speculation. What do these people know of my world? I am no one’s victim; this is a choice not a decision. With that said it is my hope an open heart and mind will accompany you threw this book. A perception is just that. The same goes for truth.

A hooker my definition:
A person who acts based upon the needs of another with the expectation of compensation.

I was a hooker long before I became a professional escort. Notice there is no mention of sexual relations within my definition. Sex is an integral part of my life affecting just about every aspect of my being, but I am far more than just that. To me, sex is what I put into it. It is sacred. It is an expression of my innermost being. It is freedom, only if within myself. As my sexuality is a major part of who I am, it is necessary to provide the needed history as to my sexual evolution.

I was in no hurry. Having passed up a few opportunities along the way at sixteen I lost that volition. I was raped. It was brutal. To that man, you know who you are, I say thank you. Having experienced the worst case scenario right out the gate, my expectations have never included unrealistic fantasies. Rather, my jewel resting safely between my legs. I choose to take responsibility for it, and my choices affecting it.

I do not look to another to complete me, understanding no one ever could. I would rather be broke and alone than a trophy on some mans mantel. That statement may lead some to assume I have a grudge or hostility towards men as a group. Nothing could be further from the truth. Actually, men are the perfect hues of paint used in the masterpiece of my life.

Back to the definition of a hooker. First, acting upon the needs of another. This can take many forms, its manifestations infinite. What does a doctor, lawyer, cashier, clerk, teacher or management professional do? What are the differences and similarities within the confines of truth? When I look out to the world I see hookers unaware. They are black, white, yellow and brown. What makes me so different from them? In a word, perception.

Bottom line, we are all players in this game we call life. I’m just hell bent and determined to win. That’s what separates the weak from the strong. How do you measure success? What tools of measurement are most appropriate for use? How much time and energy have you spent looking to the details of the transactions in your life? If you do not know, then the obvious answer is not enough. You are the only one responsible for you, as I am the only one responsible for me. You are the only one capable of determining your worth.

Without knowing, how could you possibly hope to negotiate well on your behalf? In life I have found I am never handed what I deserve, but I am more than capable of earning what I negotiate. So what are you worth? Honestly looking at you, what are your strengths and weaknesses? Personally, I enjoy discovering weakness as much, if not more than determining my strength. I’ve been told I am a rare breed. To that I smile and say thank you. Keeping up the Jones is an exercise in futility. Its fruits plain. If your goals extend no further, please put this book down now. It is not for you. Please enjoy your 2.7 offspring, SUV and house in the burbs. You have earned it. There is no shame in settling, as long as you are willing to accept such. Living your life day in and day out a hooker unaware.

For those who require more, I offer you what I have learned. Right, wrong, indifferent; I’m standing by it. My jewel on the line, I’m wiser and stronger thanks to the struggle. There is nothing quite like striving in the face of adversity. To me, a problem is nothing more than an opportunity to be brilliant. That said, lets dive into the nuts and bolts of a process I call Paid, Laid, Out the Door.

Paid

Honesty counts. I've been lied to, abused and robbed. We all have. Does that mean that because others are not honest, I should then hold myself to their standards? Absolutely not. This is their error, not mine. If honesty is a lifestyle choice you are setting yourself up to succeed. It may sound old fashioned, but effective is as effective does.

People are so used to having to deal with liars and thieves I am like a breath of fresh air. This friend is profitable. First and foremost I am a business woman. It is good business. My lifestyle reflects this. 

In choosing a lifestyle of honesty you are then choosing to stand out in a crowd. There will always be someone prettier or more talented out there. Being the prettiest or most talented will only get you so far. Being trustworthy is a rare commodity in this world, one that pays.

Again and again clients tell me of what we refer to as bad calls" or "gutter calls" in the industry. It usually happens similar to this. The escort gets to the call, is paid then comes up with an excuse to leave. She offers to leave her purse while she runs down to the car to retrieve whatever was forgotten. Already paid, she doesn't come back. The purse, generally purchased at a second hand store is empty. It may take the client a few minutes to realize what has occurred; at that point he or she has no recourse.

What does this accomplish? It’s quick easy money, but as any professional will tell you it is not the service fees that get you threw. It's the tips, the repeat customers. The boys and girls that fall in love. Just as in any industry it is paramount to build relationships. Honesty is a strong foundation. Not only do you look good but more importantly it adds to the reputation of the service you are representing.

When Daddy looks good so do I. When he's down I'm not working hard enough. You have to have friends to make it. The trick is finding the right friends and working your ass off to build something worth having. Honesty will get you there I cannot stress this enough.

This extends into every arena of my life. I do not kiss anyone unless I mean it. Having the ability to mean it is what separates me from the pack. Anyone in theory could do what I do. The question for me became how I do it better than everyone else. Simple, mean it. Intimacy implies transparency. Why have something to hide? Why go through the motions? Those are the girls who come and go. They are a dime a dozen. Imagine the clients surprise when he discovers exactly what he is looking for, wrapped in something pretty, and delivered to his door. Can you say cha ching? My daddy does.

In meaning what I do I provide others the opportunity to mean it when they kiss me. This is profound. This requires honesty. This is where cash becomes a non issue. How exactly do you put a price tag on that? Excellent question.

It is important to remember here, I am still negotiating. I am not for sale. I do however have no qualms in renting my time. Remember the phrase time is money? Eureka. Honesty pays. As a lifestyle choice you are then choosing to be profitable. This is not difficult. It is also not emotional. It is a black and white issue. Either you are honest or you are not, bottom line.

Not to say every client will give you the opportunity to shine. It’s your ability to pounce without hesitation as an opportunity presents itself that determines your standard of living. As the author of your story are you worth the investment? Are you willing to make the necessary changes doing whatever it takes to make it? That is a question only you can answer.

Paid has its own process. There is one rule I have; it’s all I need to know.

Rule #1
    Never ask for the money

The thought process behind this is simple. If money is a nonissue for me I provide the opportunity for it to be a non issue for him. Do I want him thinking about money? The cost of our encounter? ABSOLUTLY NOT. I'm the happy time girl. Between bills bosses and the ex, this is not a place I want to be. That’s why I work for a service. If there is going to be a bad guy that’s what Daddy is for. That’s also why I work so hard to make sure Daddy is always paid. I enjoy having a stack of bills for him in the morning. He does so much for me.

In practical terms when I walk through the door of a call I expect money to be on the table. If it’s a credit card call the service informed me of this when I get the call to book the call. It’s a team effort. If I'm on a cash call and no cash is presented I don't say a word. Rather call to check in as is protocol. At that point I ask for the fee with an attitude of ambivalence. It is paramount to never even feel in the recesses of my mind stress over cash. They can sense it. You've just wasted a perfectly good opportunity falling into this trap. It’s easy, just don't do it.

Now if it’s a credit card call this is just as simple. I cannot speak for all services, that said I work with the best service around. His card is preapproved. We fill out the credit card slip before I call to check in, leaving the amount blank. Think extensions, think tips. You’ll have time to fill in the amount before you leave. The point, no stress. Happy time girl is easy, easy like Sunday morning. This also gives you a goal. I never think of the dollar amount as my goal. My goal is to please. This accomplished, the bottom line reflects this. Okay, so payment is out of the way, you've called to check in. Whats next?

Laid

It’s time to build a relationship. There is a fine line here. An escort is a paid companion. This is perfectly legal in the state I live and work in. However, as an adult, with an adult I can have sex with whomever I choose. We'll talk more in depth about that later.

This is the time to sit and get to know the client.  I do more listening than talking. I'm looking for clues. On the clock I am a chameleon transforming into all he seeks. I am paid well to do this. I enjoy this. It is what separates the girls from the pros.

If a man is looking to get in, out and off he can find that on a street corner for much less than charge. Side Note: Those are the hardest working girls in the world, for all you do I say thank you. Back to the point, if he's looking in my eye he needs a complete experience. I aim to please. I pay careful attention to him. His mannerisms, environment and general demeanor. This process which started on the phone, booking the call, should take time. It is relaxed. Time flys when you are having fun, right?

This may sound like a scam; I assure you it is not. It builds the value of the overall experience. Quite frankly, the more I know, the easier it is to accommodate. It’s all about him and his desires. It is my attention to detail, my ability to navigate quickly and effectively that determines my overall value in his mind. Remember, we are still negotiating.

I am engaged in conversation. I flow with class and sophistication. I am a little naughty, but always nice. If I have done well thirty to forty minutes have passed. The time is now right to go change into something else pretty. It is in my purse. It is flattering. It gives him the opportunity to see me as the Goddess I am. I never take too long changing. I am on his time, I respect this. In respecting him, I give him the opportunity to respect me.

Generally at this point I have grown to like the client. I want to kiss him. In my proverbial book, kissing is an art. Slow and shy at first, allowing him the opportunity to show me what he is made of. Most men are beautiful. Most men truly appreciate the opportunity to show this to a woman they enjoy. Having set us both up success I have done my job well. When the driver calls about now to let me know our time together has almost expired, the extension is a non issue. Would you let me go? Not one has (knock on wood). The next hour, two or five occurs behind closed doors. Having already been paid laid is a pleasure.

The Power of Out the Door
Maintenance Free Men :)

This is the point of the call where honesty starts to deliver dividends. I am an escort; not his girlfriend, wife or priest. Most of my clients use the service for this reason. Requiring intimacy is a human condition. Though some people have learned as I have that an actual relationship does not fit into their lifestyle. It’s time to go. Do I feel used and discarded? Hell no. I've been paid, I've been laid, walking through the threshold of the door I am now free. Toni reemerges, the chameleon put back on the shelf until next time.

I don't know about you, but in my life it was never the intimacy in a relationship that drained my emotional, mental and spiritual resources. It was the act of maintenance. Laundry, mending his ego, listening to his boring thoughts and dreams. I may sound like a bitch, probably because I am.

Out the door is freedom. Having given me the best he has to offer and compensated me for my time, I am off to live my life. I'm off to meet another interesting man, go shopping, take the driver to breakfast; whatever I choose.

Are you catching this?

I choose.

No longer on the clock it’s time to pay the same careful attention to me and my needs. This is where my heart found the independence I require. This is why I love what I do. Out the door. Bye. Next.

Do you enjoy such luxury?

It was a major factor in my choice to become an escort. A job was not enough. I could find one of those anywhere. What I stumbled upon while determining my needs in truth is a lifestyle choice that enhances me. As I said before. I am the only one responsible for me. With a happy heart I take responsibility for all that I am.

Tricks of the Trade

My profession is not typical in many respects. I work when work is available. If my phone is not ringing it is my responsibly to keep myself in the necessary frame of mind. Color me crazy but even in this I find opportunity. Relationship building extends past the client. I am the face he sees but there are many people working behind the scenes facilitating success. First and foremost, my daddy, DD Robinson. Without him there are no calls, no opportunity to shine.

Long term, the relationship he has with the client is more important than mine. While on the call I consider myself an extension of him. Everything I say and do is a reflection of his professionalism. I take this very seriously. My driver is really his driver. I simply rent him. He is paid by me on a call by call basis. The driver is with me. If I have an issue it is him standing next to me on the front line. He is making sure I am safe, happy and comfortable. I am lucky to work with Bill. I respect him as an integral part of our team. Between calls is a great time to take care of my driver, as he takes care of me. If he is not at his best this is felt by the client. It is the driver’s responsibility to get me to the call on time, with minimum stress. It is important I take care of him. This process begins while booking the call.

On his behalf I write down directions including major intersections, landmarks and any other relevant information. There is nothing worse than a stressed driver. Bill takes as much pride in his work as I do. The car is always clean, the music to my liking. He has extra credit card slips, emergency make-up and most importantly an attitude of professionalism. In this environment we all win.

Between calls it is typical for me to take him out to eat, sit and talk and work out any new bugs in his computerized GPS system. I pay him for his service but he is not hired help. Worse case scenario, he is my lifeline. I am mindful of this. On a less serious note, between calls is a great time to do some investment shopping. Most major cities have twenty four hours stores selling lingerie and other related products. A particular store we usually end up at due to location does not provide dressing rooms. They also have a no return policy.

If it does not look right on me I will not wear it on a call. Similarly, if it looks great, within the confines of "investment shopping" I am more than happy to pay retail. Bill on many occasions has acted like a human dressing door for me. No wonder he is well paid on my clock.

It is very important to note, this is a professional relationship. It is never okay in my opinion to cross necessary boundaries. If he ever asked, I would tell him to call the service if he wishes to be a client. Luckily, it has yet to be an issue. My daddy has enough to do for me to create a problem when solutions are profitable. People are people. That said, regardless of the unique working environment the lines drawn in the sand keep everyone in a frame of mind facilitating success.

It is also typical to have additional escorts working with the same driver at the same time. There are no specific rules I have for this, as I have found everyone is different. As for guidelines, I strive to always give more than I take. We may all be chasing cheddar but that does not mean that fighting or discord is acceptable. I let the other girl sit in front. When they are comfortable, generally I am too. It is also important to be patient. Even if you are running late to a call and for the third time in three hours she is demanding to stop at yet another convenient store. Getting worked up over this does nothing to help you. It only hurts your ability to shine on your call. Stress is for suckers.

I also believe that unless it has become an absolutely impossible situation daddy has better things to do than to babysit. As I never cry wolf, in this situation his strong steady hand gets us all back on course. In controlling myself I have absolutely no need to control another. And anyways control is overrated. Live and let live.

My Tips for Sexual Health

1. Never fake an orgasm. It is overrated. Your body does show signs of climax. No matter how great you can gyrate and moan, the proof is in the pudding. Beyond that fake is a symptom of our degenerated society. Even if you choose to live your life within the standards of truth, all one must do is walk out their front door to be bombarded with images and people who fall into the category of fake. Just because it is prevalent does not mean it is what people seek. Some do, most don't. This falls back to honesty. It is a choice, not a decision.

Be marketable, it is not difficult.

Furthermore, what do I give myself faking it? Nothing. It is neither implied nor required that I climax in every sexual encounter. Though when I do, I choose to enjoy every morsel, no matter the partner. And quite frankly, most people are eager to take the time, investing the energy. Most people understand the depths of their pleasure are wholly dependent upon the pleasure of their partner. Those who do not would be better off with some lub and a magazine. In this situation my mind wanders to ..... Out the Door.

2. Who pays, who plays?

That all depends on where we meet. If I meet a person socially, they never pay. I won't let them. If daddy facilitates the introduction they never play. This is a non emotional issue. It is either one way or another. No exceptions.

3. Four play Matters

Kissing, touching, a great massage; these are the things that lead to great sex.

It is an art.

It is unique to everyone. It is also an issue of trust. Specifically, trust of self. There is nothing sexier than confidence. To be perfectly honest, I am no supermodel. I do not aspire to be such. One of the simple joys in my life is looking into the eyes of a lover as they run their hand over my stomach. Not to say I do not care for myself, I do. But I also just don't lay there wishing an airbrush would make it better. It is my body and I love it. Even the guys who like the supermodel types cannot resist confidence. It is my secret weapon, it works.

And anyways, perfection is overrated. If I were to spend four hours a day in a gym I would lose the time devoted to my mental and spiritual health. I am a whole person, I respect this.

4. Most men don't want to just "Get off"

Referring back to lub and a mag, I am not required for this. If I intend to have a sexual encounter I never jump strait for it. I push his buttons, he needs me to. This is also the difference between the girls and the pros in my opinion.

5. Know When to Shut It Off

I am a woman who can go all night and into the next. I have yet to meet a man who can keep up. Some will attempt to. In my opinion, this is the equivalent to me faking it. Once his desire is no longer there, I shut off the magick box until next time. Still negotiating, still facilitating.

Most encounters begin before I meet my new friend. Generally, on the phone. I've found that sultry is sexy. Mystery is appreciated. Understatement is rewarded. Professional, attentive, playful; that’s why they ask for me. Everyone is looking for something. Most people are easy to please. It is ability to navigate clearly, noticing the signs and responding well that makes or breaks you in this business.

The Realities of the Modern Woman
My Point of View

To give the best, I must be the best. It is a responsibility. I get out of life exactly what I put into it. All day, every day. Before you immediately disagree I would implore you to look at the details of the transactions of your life. Taking full responsibility for your actions, regardless of the injustices delivered to you.

As for the mundane needs we all have. Life is what happens on the way. In devoting enough time and energy to the things not considered fun am able to fully enjoy the fun things. This is not difficult. It is required.

I am a coffee drinker and a walker. This is my time. In the afternoon when I wake up, my first thoughts are to the mocha waiting for me at my local coffee house. I shower quickly and find my way to the java. Then I walk for as long as time allows. It may sound inconsequential; I assure you it is not. How in the world can I expect to give flawlessly call after call if I am not at my best. In black and white, facts only, I cannot.

Understanding not everyone enjoys the luxuries my profession allows I am not saying you must walk to be successful. I am saying that based on your needs, beliefs and reality no one will take care of you like you can. This is not as easy as it sounds. This is a choice, not a desicion. Think of yourself as merchandise if you must to wrap your mind around this concept. The dividends will blow your mind. They did mine.

I've also found the more thought I invest into any situation, the accommodating said situation becomes. Instead of looking for a quick fix, something to do, I reassess my thoughts and beliefs. The process of action becomes obvious. I do not guess, I know. My jewel on the line, I have no tolerance for compromise here. But then again I am the only one directly affected.

Daddy

I am sitting on an airplane right now. I wondering how to discuss what has become the most important relationship in my life. As I usually rely on my gut, I choose to keep writing and see where it leads me.

Daddy is a businessman bottom line. This is one of his best qualities. Being so he is easy to understand. He is my boss, but I also think of him as a friend. He knows me like no other. When I am a little moody he reminds me that I know better.

To be continued ..........

My prayer:

Prostitution is sacred
May I serve
May I meet the intended where they lay
May I lead the willing to paradise
Mentally, Spiritually, Physically
Peak,
give it all to me
I seek to serve
May we fly together
By the hour
~so mote it be