{TITLE} Pt. 8

Part Eight.

         When Keela had calmed down and the two remained sitting for a while, Rylan stood up. He didn't say anything but Keela knew that it was time for her to go back to her cell and she slowly stood as well.  Her face was still damp and tear stained as she presented her hands to Rylan so he could tie them together. Instead he examined her raw and red wrists before gingerly placing them at her sides again. He then went to his desk and Keela heard the opening and closing of drawers behind her. When he returned he simply lay a gentle hand on her shoulder and led her to the door, not restraining her at all; perhaps he knew she wouldn't run away.

         Keela's eyes stung with more tears but she didn't feel like crying anymore and as she and Rylan walked down the warm hall, she kept her eyes focused on the ground. She felt ashamed, even angry at herself. She knew she wasn't the one who caused this and that there was nothing she could have done, but showing such weakness wasn't something she usually did—she couldn't even remember the last time she cried. And breaking down in front of the prince made her feel even more vulnerable. She just wanted to go back to her cell, to forget this ever happened, and rejoice in the news she had been given earlier that morning.

         The air started to get thicker with a rotting stench as they drew nearer to the prisoners hold. The large windows suddenly shrunk in size and the now dim light flowing from them diminished. Keela's eyes adjusted quickly to the familiar darkness and it wasn't long before they reached the heavy door that separated the humans from the prisoners, as the Kingdom made it seem. The Shanmorc’s treated their prisoners as scum, non-human, things that didn't deserve to live. They thought of themselves as the superior beings; everyone was below them.

         Though Audivae was a clear example of her family and their beliefs—almost forgetting that she shouldn't kill valuable prisoners just to prove she is higher than them—Rylan was different. His intriguing innocence usually annoyed Keela and she hated that she could find no reason to despise him other than his last name. She speculated on what he would be like based on his family, but in the past few weeks—today especially—he had shown that he was nothing like his sister or his father. Throughout Keela's sharp words and spiteful actions, Rylan had shown kindness and compassion, and, though he had his moments, he was always calm and patient with her. Keela hated to admit it, but she was wrong about him.

         They were now mere feet away from Keela's cell and she was almost relieved to go back to the tiny space. Yet her heart sank further from its low point at the sight of three figures that were near her door; two guards standing behind the Princess Audivae. Keela shifted her gaze back to the floor, refusing to look into such evil eyes. With Rylan behind her, his hand on her shoulder, guiding her down the hall, they drew closer to the group. Keela could feel Audivae's eyes boring into her and her smirk burned her skin.

         “So,” Audivae said in a gloating tone as soon as Keela was within two feet of her, “are you willing to cooperate now? Or was that not enough?”

         Keela stopped. She couldn't believe the words that had just come out of Audivae's mouth, but at the same time she wouldn't have expected anything less. Rylan put a slight pressure on her shoulder, urging her to go forward, but Keela stood firm. With red, sorrowful eyes, she turned her head to look at the girl she hated.

         “What makes you think it will ever be enough?” she asked. Her voice was raspy and sore, but she was determined to speak her mind. “What could possibly possess you to believe that anything you could ever to do me—interrogation, torture, death threats, anything—would make me betray my country?”

         Audivae's smirk faltered and a serious expression came over her face. “You already did,” she said coldly. “You're a traitor, remember?”

         “The Kingdom was never my country,”Keela said softly, “and it never will be.”

         Now when Rylan nudged her forward, she complied and looked away from the princess. As they passed the guards and girl, she heard Rylan say, “That was sick, Audivae.” His tone was filled with disgust and Keela was grateful that he—in a way—stuck up for her.

         A single turn to the right, the high-pitched creak and the echoing slam of the door and they were back in Keela's cell, as they had been many times before. Now free from Rylan's hand on her shoulder, Keela walked to her usual corner and carefully sat down, gingerly resting her hands in her lap and leaning back against the cool metal wall. Rylan came and sat in front of her and she noticed what he was holding: ointment and gauze and medical tape. Realizing what he was going to do, as soon as he sat down she raised her wounded wrists to him. They were shining a bright red and several small trickles of dried blood painted her pale forearms, but Rylan just focused on her wrists. The anti-biotic cream stung as Rylan spread it around the raw skin but soon it was a numb pain and it didn't bother her much. Keela stared endlessly at the floor as Rylan patched her up, thoughts racing through her mind.

         She had always been able to protect the Nation and was considered to be their best spy, not just because she was good at what she did, but because she was excellent at keeping secrets. No form of pain, no trick that the Shanmorc's performed could ever make her open her mouth. Yet it wasn't stamina or pain tolerance she possessed—if something truly was painful she would certainly let people know—often she simply couldn't feel anything and she didn't care if what they did killed her.

         But today was very different. This was not death that would be over quickly; this was something she would have to deal with for the rest of her life. This was not a whip to her back or burning metal to her skin; this was her ultimate fear. Only those who understood her past could know why and there was just one person who did—Elli. If he had known yesterday what Audivae would do today, he would have done anything in his power to protect Keela.

         Today shook her down to her very core, and the one to comfort her in her weakest moment was not the one who knew everything about her, but the one who had known her for the least amount of time. She secluded herself from him, ignored his kind actions, and never realized that by asking so many questions and spilling out his own past, Rylan was merely trying to put them both on equal ground. Perhaps he deserved more than what Keela had given him—perhaps he deserved the truth.

         “My mother's name,” she began, the words scratching at her throat. Keela paused and coughed as Rylan finished wrapping up her wrists. His eyes were shinning brightly, open wide and attentive and she found the voice to continue. “My mother's name was Lendsa,” she said, and just the sound of such a sweet name calmed her. For a moment she sat there, allowing the memories to come back to her. Rylan, sensing that this would take a while, leaned against the wall closest to Keela and waited.

         “She was born in the French Province of the Nation,” she finally said. “My father was a General in the Kingdom Army and was stationed in Kingdom occupied France, only a small section in the north-west at the time. He met my mother there and instantly fell in love.” Keela nearly scoffed at such an expression. To her, love is something that takes time to develop; if it exists at all.

         She continued, “When he came back to the Kingdom, he brought my mother after teaching her English. Being a General, no one questioned his reasons for doing so. He also had very close ties with your father,”she looked at Rylan with icy eyes, “and nobody dared making a negative impression with the King.”

         Rylan looked at her, unwavering under her cold gaze. Keela didn't look at him long and went on with her story. “It wasn't long before I was brought into this wasteland. From what I can remember, I lived a happy life. My parents were good to me and I had everything a little toddler could want. My father wasn't always around, but my mother and I were very close. She would hug me, and kiss me, and play with me all day long. Not once did I see her without a smile on her face in those days.”

         Reminiscing brought a soft grin to her own lips. Keela paused, imagining what her mother looked like—from what little memory she had. She closed her eyes as she spoke again. “When I was just two and a half she started to teach me all about her culture and her language. I was never more fascinated by anything.”

         When Keela realized how short her time with her mother really was, her smile faded. The haunting images suddenly came back to her and hit her with incredible force. She opened her eyes and felt a sudden clenching in her throat. She struggled to continue, but something kept her going. “Everything was so perfect...but it didn't last long,” she said in a soft whisper that echoed around the room. “Someone told the King who my mother really was—the enemy, someone not from our land, an unclean being. Shanmorc personally ordered Morks to my home to find the Nation scum. My father—of course—wasn't home and when the police arrived at our secluded little house, it was just me and my mom. We were defenseless.”

         She stopped, not knowing exactly how to explain what happened next. Why was her mother's face such a blur, but those horrible events so vivid in her minds eye? Keela decided the best way to say it was to just say it. “They raped her in front of me,” she said, her eyes fixed on the blank floor—no patch of sunlight warmed the room now. “They figured simply arresting her wasn't enough.”

         The clenching in her throat tightened as tears brimmed her red eyes. She forced them back and made herself talk, though she wanted so much to stop. “After raiding the liquor cabinet, they decided to play around with some fire. I hid like a coward in the woods while I saw my house burn to the ground, my distressed mother still inside.”

         Keela couldn't hold the tears any longer and they slowly rolled down her sodden cheeks. Rylan was silent as Keela again showed her weak side to him, but he comforted her with sympathetic eyes—at least he was listening.

         “When my father finally came home he was scared,” she said. “I had never seen him like that before. Apparently the Morks had come to arrest him for treason and he had just barely gotten away. When I told him what happened he was shocked, to say the least. After a while he just started walking. I followed.”

         As the memories became more clear in her mind, Keela paused once more to gather them up and spill her past to her potential enemy—her potential friend. The suspense rose with the eternal silence, and Rylan shifted in his place. “What happened next?” he asked. His tone was soft and caring, but Keela could tell he was anxious to know more.

         She pressed forward, “We moved aimlessly from place to place, hardly speaking to anyone, stealing what we needed, sleeping where we could.” She stopped and noticed how she said 'we' as if the two of them had done it together. “Well,” she started again, “I guess it was more liked he moved aimlessly from place to place, I tagged along; he stole what he needed only for himself, I stole for me; he would often find a place to stay for the night, posing as a traveler, I was left to sleep outside. He didn't provide for me, he refused to acknowledge my presence. The only time he ever spoke to me was when he was drunk and shouting about my mother's death. He blamed me for it all, though I could never figure out how a three-year-old child was to fault for her own mother's end.”

         Her original sadness had turned into hatred for her father. Keela's eyes dried and her jaw clenched. “Through all the neglect and physical abuse, never once did I think about leaving. I had learned enough to live on my own and it probably would have been a better life if I did. But the fact that he was wandering throughout the Kingdom, no destination in mind and lost in his heart, made me stay with him. He was my father...and no matter how horrible he was, I couldn't leave him.

         “Of course the Morks were still on our tail—the King didn't like the idea of a traitor constantly eluding him—and it was four years before they finally caught up with us. They had no interest in me, though now it's a different story. Moments after they took him away I heard the shot.... That was the happiest day of my life.... My father was finally gone and I could do what I wanted. It was like a great weight was lifted off of me. I was free....”

         Rylan was listening intently and did not seem surprised at Keela's unfeeling toward her father's death. Perhaps he thought she was right after what he had done; or perhaps he was just used to it by now.

         “On that day,” she continued, “I decided to get back at the Kingdom for tearing my family apart. I would make King Shanmorc's life a living hell, as he had done to mine.”

         “But how?” Rylan asked. “If the Kingdom knew about your father, how could you get information from anyone?”

         Keela smirked, this was perhaps the most brilliant thing she ever did in her early years. “True, the Kingdom knew about my treacherous father—if you could even call him that—but hardly anyone knew about his half-breed daughter. And,” she said, her grin spreading across her face, “my uncle came in handy, too.”

         Rylan's brow furrowed and Keela explained. “My father's brother also was a General and a very private man. I only met him once in my life, though hardly remember it. He never shared anything about his personal life but was still very well known, especially for his short temper. All I had to do was find libraries, government buildings, army bases and headquarters, anything that could provide me with information. As long as I had my uncle's name and his anger as a threat, I was allowed into every restricted area imaginable. And using this kind of access I was able to contact the Nation. I met with Crads all over the Kingdom. They took my secrets and in return shared their own and trained me. I learned how to fight, how to lie perfectly, and six different languages. They took me under their wing and let me into their world—they became my new family.

         “It took your father six years to figure out who had been trading secrets to the Nation. I was able to avoid the Morks for a while, but even my good knowledge of the terrain in this country couldn't keep them off for more than a year. They caught me and brought me here, but that never stopped me from doing my job. And until I die, it never will.”

         When she had finished there was a beat of silence. It took Rylan a moment to figure out how to say what he was thinking. “So your mother was killed,” he started slowly, “and after your father died you started handing the Nation classified information?”

         Keela nodded.

         Rylan hesitated, but spoke his mind. “Were you really that happy when your father was killed? Didn't you feel any remorse at all?”

         Keela wasn't sure how to answer. The only remorse she ever had was that any of it happened. If it all hadn't started in the first place she could still be with her mother. “I wish I could tell you I did. I wish my father would have given me the love and respect I tried to gain from him, but no matter what I did, it was never enough. After years of abuse, all the pain he caused me made me physically and emotionally numb. Did I love him? In a way. Did I feel remorse when he died? No. I just couldn't feel remorse, or much of anything else.”

         Rylan looked her in the eyes, and she had the feeling he was reading her. She blankly stared back, hoping he wouldn't ask her to talk about her past anymore, and he didn't. He simply nodded gently and stood up, overshadowing Keela. “I'm gonna get something,” he said softly. “I'll be right back.” He turned and with another shrill creak and echoing bang he left the cell.

         Keela looked around the room, studying the walls and floor as if seeing it for the first time. This place never seemed like a threat to her in all the years she had spent in it. But now that Audivae knew what truly scared her, everything seemed to have the potential to really harm her.

         When the door opened again several minutes later, Keela expected Rylan to be standing in the doorway. However she turned around to discover she was wrong.

         “Well?” Audivae asked.

         Keela's jaw tightened and her eyes narrowed. “Well what?”

         “Are you going to give in?” she asked impatiently.

         Keela really wasn't in the mood make up a snappy comeback, so she simply stated, “No.”

         Audivae looked as though she could have exploded, but a voice from behind her stopped her.

         “She won't talk because your plan didn't work.”

         The princess turned. “And why is that, Rylan?” she asked coldly. “What did you have to do with that?”

         Standing behind the royal brat was her big brother holding a blanket and a small pillow. “I stopped Chad and told him to go back to his room,” Rylan said, tossing his things in the corner and walking to the center of the cell. “And tomorrow we're having a nice, long talk.”

         A fire sparked in Audivae's eyes. She whispered to him coldly, “You used to enjoy watching the interrogations with me when we were younger. Why would you interrupt my direct orders?”

         “Because it was sick and twisted,” he answered forcefully. “You went too far, Audivae.”

         She was silent for a moment. “You've changed, Rylan,” was all she said and she turned away from the prince and the traitor.

         “Hey,” Keela called and Audivae stopped. Keela didn't really want to ask what she was about to say, but she needed an answer. “How did you know?” she asked softly.

         The princess turned her head slightly and after a silent moment answered, “It's the one thing that every girl is most afraid of.”

         With that, she left, shutting the door behind her. Rylan and Keela were alone once more and she noticed that it was getting dark outside already. A sudden chill entered the cell as night fell that sent a shiver up Keela's spine.

         “Here,” Rylan said, walking to the corner to grab his things and handing the pillow to her. “You've had a rough day.”

         Keela, slightly unsure and not having used a pillow since she was three, put the pillow in the corner and gingerly lay down on the floor. Pain shot through her as she moved but it subsided when she relaxed. As soon as her head touched the soft, fluffy texture, her eyelids became heavy and her body ached for sleep. Rylan gently dropped the warm blanket over her and she felt much better—she felt at peace.

         But when she heard Rylan stand and walk toward the door, she bolted up, wincing as she did so. “Where are you going?” she asked.

         He turned. “Back to my room. You really should try to get some sleep.”

         “But, don't you want your blanket?”

         “I have more, it's fine.” He turned away, but Keela spoke again.

         “Well, I don't want it to be in here with just me—I mean, what if...if a guard comes in and thinks I stole it and he...he....” Keela was surprised at herself; she had never been this frantic before.

         “Okay, okay,” Rylan said reassuringly. “Do you want me to stay here?”

         Keela hesitated, unsure about what she wanted. Eventually she said softly, “Could you?”

         Rylan smiled gently and walked to the wall opposite Keela where he sat down and leaned against the metal. She suddenly felt much more at ease and Keela gave in to her body's wishes. She slowly closed her eyes while asking, “Are you sure you don't want the blanket?”

         She could almost see him grin as he answered, “I'm sure.”

         Her mind was drifting away as sleep floated toward her. But before she let it take her, she needed to know something. “What was your mother's name?” she asked, her eyes still shut.

         Rylan was silent for a moment before he said, “Rinel.”

         Keela hummed softly as the world began to slip into nothingness. Yet something stopped her from falling asleep; a flicker of light in the never ending darkness.

         “Thank you,” she said just above a whisper.

         Though Rylan did not reply, Keela knew he had heard her. Then, finally, sleep washed over her and peace filled her mind.