Jackie Hood

        Red Riding Hood’s real name was Jackie Hood. Her name was on account of her red hair which was truly, remarkably red. The name was given by one of her customers, a pathetic dull-eyed man who had but a spark of sanity left. The name stuck as her popularity on the streets grew.



         Jackie had a grandma that was placed in a nursing home to spend the rest of her life. No one else in the family cared about Jackie’s grandma (she was a mean lady) with the exception of Jackie, who really only displayed interest because she made Jackie money. A lot of money. There were folks at the nursing home were in a lot of pain. Naturally, these old folks desired painkillers. The good stuff too, not the stuff for broken bones but the kind you get because cancer is rotting you from the inside out. The kind Jackie had access to in large amounts.



         Jackie’s grandmother, a business woman at heart, saw opportunity to make money and seized it. She knew her granddaughter Jackie could get what the old folks so desperately needed in quantities no medical personnel would dare allow them access to. She also knew a lot of the old folks had money – folks with social security checks, 401ks, and those uptight penny pinchers that never saw a reason to part with their money until the dull ache in their guts turned into intense pain. She called Jackie up with a business proposition: The more drugs, the more money.



         Jackie Hood was on it like a crack-head on crack, which was an appropriate analogy to make considering Jackie had once been addicted to crack. Every other week Jackie would arrive at the nursing home with a fresh batch of painkillers hidden cleverly inside a basket of goodies and Jackie’s grandmother would give Jackie thick wads of cash wrapped in sweaters she had knitted. It was short, it was sweet, and it was extremely lucrative – just the way Jackie liked it.



This had gone on for a couple months and it wasn’t long before someone found out about it that shouldn’t have.



This person was a disgruntled worker named William Lexley. ‘Lex’ as they called him, cleaned and cared for the elderly. At times he felt like they were akin to dogs. He had to bathe them, tend to their bathroom needs, and walkthrough how to work the television (Some of the more senile residents had to be taught daily, over and over again. This infuriated Lex to no extent).  He rarely was thanked throughout his toils, mostly he was ignored. The old folks didn’t particularly like him, the attitude that they held towards Lex was tantamount to a robot. Once the necessary tasks Lex performed were over, they simply stopped paying attention to him.



Over time he grew very depressed and angry. He began to drink heavily, but that never seemed to defeat his anger and depression. He was desperate for something. He felt like he would explode. One day, Jackie’s grandmother took notice of his anger and depression and inquired to the source of his ailments. She offered to sell him some “happy medicine” as she called it. Lex was intrigued. He took the painkillers home that night after paying a hefty price and tried it for the first time. It blew his mind. He wanted more.

It wasn’t long after that he was spending each paycheck as soon as it entered his bank account. Lex was addicted, and as his funds steadily spiraled away to nothing, Lex grew more and more desperate. He first resorted to stealing money from other old people at the nursing home, but it was getting harder and harder to get away with it. After a while even the most senile of the senile were wise to the fact their money seemed to disappear whenever Lex was around. Eventually detectives showed up questioning him. He wasn’t sure what the detectives had on him but it was only a matter of time before they had enough to arrest him.



Lex needed painkillers and he needed to get out of town. It was the end of the week and he knew that Jackie’s grandmother did not have the quantities of painkillers he needed to keep himself sated. What he needed was a huge amount – enough to keep withdrawals at bay while he found a new source of painkillers in whatever area he decided to relocate to.  He had already suspected Jackie Hood of supplying her grandmother with the painkillers, and he knew that she came to visit her grandmother at the beginning of every other week. Fortunately for Lex, this happened to be the next day. He would go in her room after the transaction had been completed and make her overdose on painkillers. He would then get the rest of her painkillers and jet. Lex went to sleep smiling that night.



As Jackie entered the nursing home that day she took notice to some shady individuals. These individuals happened to be undercover detectives determined to get the necessary evidence to prosecute Lex. Jackie always had a sixth sort of sense for sniffing out cops and the vibes the undercover put out made her nervous. Reaching into her basket of goodies, Jackie pulled out the pistol she kept next to the painkillers and put it in the waistband of her jeans, hiding it under her shirt.



Jackie opened the door to her grandmothers’ room, only to find it literally torn apart. Each drawer in the room had been opened, every piece of furniture over turned, and things such as books and clothes littered the floor. On top of the mattress lay her grandmother.



“Grandma...what happened here?” Jackie asked.



“Oh, nothing dear,” Jackie’s grandmother said, “I just decided to rearrange the room.”



“You decided to rearrange the room? I don’t buy it. What’s going on?” Jackie touched the spot where her pistol was at. She saw a strange movement from underneath the huge down comforter her grandmother had wrapped around her.



“Now dear, quit being an idiot and just give me the painkillers. These transactions have always been short and sweet so let’s just get this over with. I got angry today trying to find something in here and tore the place up.”



Her grandmother emanated confidence and assurance but her eyes gave it away – they reeked of fear, something Jackie was good at detecting  in addition to her cop sense.



“Fine, fine, grandma. Here you go.” Jackie said as she put a hand to her pistol and slowly advanced towards the bed. She placed the basket at her grandmother’s nightstand, and with one swift move, lifted up her bed sheets while drawing her pistol. In bed with her was Lex, who had a knife pressed to the side of her grandmother’s left breast.



“What the f…” That was all Jackie could get out before Lex lunged at her.



Quickly, while Lex was in midair, Jackie raised the pistol up fired three times. The first two shots caught him in the chest. The last shot erased Lex’s face from his body, and he collapsed in a bloody heap.



The undercover detectives, upon hearing shots fired, rushed up into the room. It didn’t take them long to discover the painkillers or the drug ring that had been run at the nursing home. Jackie and her grandmother were quickly arrested.



Surprisingly, no major news station merited the story to be very interesting. The only people to hear the fateful story were the locals, and it was greeted with lukewarm enthusiasm. This disinterest was perhaps due to a famous celebrity’s death that occurred at the same time.