misconnection

I can hear my connection to this place fading like a dial tone from a dropped phone. Slipping out of my hand and crashing onto the floor. I thought i only felt this way around you, perhaps for attention. Such utter useless panic, a need to grasp onto things that have no meaning. I place the blame all around but never land on myself. Stale smoke drifts around clouding my judgment. The need to feel strongly about something, anything slips away. I remain sitting here in my own mind, not ever knowing if what i am doing is the right thing. If i could stop the actions i might remain here in silence. Maybe once only a whisper of the truth could have set me free.