Just The Mood I was In At The Time.

"Look at that Schemie looking guy," she says. But not like she was something like! More like she was trying to make herself look less scummy in front of her new University pals by putting me in a lower category. I didn't want to make myself seem as bad as her like, but I could tell by the sound of her voice that she was working class and a mature student too. Late forties and she obviously liked her own cooking. I wanted to tell her she looked like a dinner lady, but I have been trying to watch what I say. The problem is though when I should retort or comment I don't, and when I should keep it shut I hear myself say the most endless arsehole shite. It's aw tae fuck. Especially with the drink.

But everyone starts the behaviour with the drink though. Like when I reached the next pub for instance where I was meeting a mate thats got an offer on for one pound a pint betwen 6 and 11. My mate's gay like, but he's kind of serious about being catholic too, so he always makes out, and this can make him a bit abrasive at times. He introduced me to his friend who comes from a town near New York City. Jewish guy like. Now my mate told him I wasn't gay but the guy kept on looking at me. And the more he drank the more he looked. I was trying not to let it bother me.

After a while we were all steaming and my mate was going on about how it was best to be Catholic, all defensive about it and the other guy was going on about how everybody is antisemitic. Even if they don't know it. Going on about Palestine and the Arabs as if it was okay to be prejudiced against them, but it's not okay to be antismitic. The cunt just kept going on and on like this, every now and then looking at me. As if to draw me in or as if he was in with a chance. No way either way. I went for a piss to get away from them both but when I got back the Jewish guy told me my mate had fucked off home. I wasn't happy about being left with this cunt so I said to him that I was going for something to eat. He smiles up at me trying to lock eyes with me and says, "Oh I'm starving too, we'll go together. Do you know a good place?"
"Aye," I said, "I ken a wee cafe not far from here." So I led the cunt along Nicholson street into Kebab Muhal where every Arab and his brother are sitting. He was shitting it. "Right," I said, never letting on, "what dae ye fancy?"
"Oh," he says, " you'd better order for me, I don't know what any of this is." "Dae ye just want tae have what ahm havin?" I went. "Um, yeah okay," he says. Well the cunt was sweating before the curry came but you should have seen the cunt during and after it. The tears were streaming down his big red face and all the Arab cunts were laughing at him. I just stayed poker face and said I had to nip out to make a phone call and fucked off and left the cunt to pay. Fuck knows how long he sat there and serves him right. I've got nothing against gays or Jews, but when they're laying it on me well fuck that.