A Yearning

A Yearning

Look in my eyes, deeply,
I have control now.
I love you like myself,
but I have come close to extinction
so many times, and now again.

She calls and I am here,
where the air is frozen,
and I am afraid, paralyzed,
and so is she.

I could have solved this with courage
a word, but I am watching her die,
someone I grew to love,
someone who knew she was dying
by the look on my face.

And why should she lie,
when she says she’s not afraid.
Why lie, Beware, she says,
but I am guilty of nothing,
except of being afraid.

I can feel her tremble.
Is there anything I can do for you?
She shakes her head no,
and yet I know she doesn’t hear me,
my voice makes scratches in the air,
lightning in a summer sky.

God is metal, after all, strong and silent,
immovable, inanimate, unfeeling.
we offer grace and beauty,
grasping at things that don’t matter,
blind to the only thing that does matter,
and when I offer you my dreams, my life,
you smile and turn away.

When we walked in the mountains that day,
a big horn sheep came around the rock,
froze for an instant,
and then it bounded away,
It’s gone, you said, it’s gone.
But it will be back,
like love, hope, a yearning.


-- Aurelio