personal account of releasing the past and all the pain it has brought me |
As the waves crash to shore And the tide slowly recedes The past comes back to mock me again And my wounded heart as it bleeds Why do I hang on? There's not so much to see And the person I was then Is definitely not me Back then I was insecure Back then I was weak Back then I was unable to love myself Back then I was unable to speak I was too afraid of loneliness then I gave much more than I took So how come each time I go further in life Do I decide to take one more look? I'm hanging on to nothing Because nothing is what's really there I have grown so much since then So why should I really care? Maybe because it's safe The fantasy of something so sure But the truth is that the unknown Is what makes me ache for more I am ready to use my wings To extend them and to fly It's the past's shackles that have held me down And made me want to die I have become a brave warrior And I did it all on my own I can honestly say that I'm really proud Of how much I have grown Those people didn't love me And they took my love as sin So now the best known solution Is to finally shed that skin Their love for me was conditional As long as I did what they say They never understood that I am different I had to do things my own way They judged me for my choices They judged me for my ways They judged how I spent my nights And how I spent my days I shared with them my gifts And gave away all my love But one by one they turned away So I looked to the stars above The stars were much more sincere For at my darkest they brought me light They told me I'm fine just as I am And I no longer have to fight So now I see that the past Reappears just as a test To see if I am finally ready To lay the broken me to rest The exorcism is taking place And soon I shall be free To spread these wings that God gave me Soaring high where I'm meant to be |