A Deepened Hunger~ A Vampire's Journal

Every Sunday evening~ once darkness covers the earth a page from Lucian's journal will be posted


A Deepened Hunger will introduce you to Lucian Monroe~ a 400-year old vampire. Read his personal journal and see how it all began…


December~ 1608

As darkness covered the earth, I awoke. A burning need claimed my soul to nourish my corpse—to ease the hunger within. Reminding me… I am ‘undead’. With a single thought, I hovered above the city. My creator—smiling, pleased I mastered the transformation from mist into human form. Taking my hand we hunted as one. The ebony eyed beauty~ Kara… a vampire since the time of pharaohs. As we approached the square, I began to salivate. For the smell of human blood was intoxicating as it pumped through their veins.

Piercing my thoughts Kara whispered, “Take control of her mind. Call the young lady to you Lucian. Mask reality and feed—but do not drain her! Remember what I taught you… we do not kill to survive. For there is no need.”

I felt my teeth lengthen. Drawing in a breath I wrapped the woman in my arms, easing her fear with a calming kiss. My hunger intensified and I sank my fangs deep into her flesh. As the warm liquid coated my throat, the burning with-in began to subside. Fighting my inner self to calm the beast, I took only what I needed. I then closed the wound with my healing tongue. Sensing Kara’s approval—for I did not disappoint her. Once our hunger was satisfied, we strolled beneath the moonlit sky. Again I asked why she had chosen me, why not another. For I was an earl from birth, my father’s first born. And this existence would dishonor the Monroe name—my country. The vampire glanced up at me with sorrow filled eyes. I sensed her thoughts and cursed. The sorrow within was not for turning me into one of the undead—but for all of mankind…

I rest in this darkened crypt—waiting for the sleep of the dead to claim me—yet again. For I yearn to visit—Monroe Castle. Yearn for my mother’s smile, my sister’s laughter. For two full moons have passed over the earth since my last calling. Since the night, I was made vampire.

Damn you! To the devil Kara! For you had no right… my loyalty lies with England and my family. And by God I shall find a way to live amongst them as the creature you turned me into…

Lucian Monroe~

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February~ 1609
As I awoke this evening—I’d come to a decision. Over the past months I learned to control my hunger—through my mind. After feeding, I was headed to England… to my home. Monroe Castle—how I’ve missed my old life. With a thought, I turned into mist and became one with the night. Kara joined me as I hunted. I sensed her disappointment instantly. My maker feared—I was not ready to live among humans. Fearing I would unveil the secret—vampires were not a myth. I assured the vampire she need not worry.
She glanced up and smiled, piercing my mind. “I understand this existence is not of your wishing—Lucian. And for that… I am truly sorry. But in time you will see. Why I chose you. Here is the key to your new dwelling. Do not act a fool… and remain at Monroe Castle once the sun rises—“
I took the key from Kara’s hand and swallowed. Only one residence—in all of England had this unique lock. The son of a respected family… would now rest in the dwelling… once—the ghostly asylum for the mentally insane. Sensing my disapproval, Kara laughed. Then clarified the dwelling had been renovated and now was quite lovely. I nodded and turned to leave. With a singled breath—the vampire pulled me into a crushing kiss and bid me good-evening. Reminding me she’ll always know my thoughts.
Around mid-night I arrived at Monroe Castle. Wondering, did I need to be invited into my own home since I was vampire? Sensing Martha was still in my families employ, I willed the young woman to me. My moment of unease faded… for Martha threw her arms around my neck and screamed with delight. Then she pulled me into the grand ballroom. For on this night my mother and father were hosting a social gathering.
My mother rushed toward me—tears staining her eyes. I embraced her in my arms. Knowing I made the right choice. For my family meant everything to me. I kissed my mother’s cheek then greeted my father. Anticipation washed through me… for I sensed mixed emotions within him. Fearing his first born had disappointed him in every way these past months. Sir Edward Monroe—the father I’d admired since childhood. I shook his hand and apologized for my behavior. My father nodded, stating he received my letters explaining my absence and there was no need for apologies.
Sensing my confusion Kara touched my mind. “I would not allow your family to believe you a dishonorable son, Lucian. The letters I sent explained you were assisting an old friend in need.”
Silently I cursed—by the fates! Kara truly planned my fate well before the night she turned me into one of the undead!

Lucian Monroe~




Spring 1609~
Tonight the reality of what I’ve become is clear. I am truly a monster—a creature who feeds on the living—needing their blood to exist. For I have acted a fool… believing I could survive as before. Believing, even as one of the undead—I would take a bride… honor my father’s request.
Juliana… we were introduced the night I returned. Her blue eyes were enchanting, her smile trusting. That evening began our courtship. And me believing what I’d become did not change the human within me. She never questioned my absence during the day. Her youth and inexperience—blind to my deceit. These past months I felt contentment—at peace. The vampire—vowing to attest his maker was incorrect. That one of the undead could exist amid the living…
I satisfied my hunger prior to escorting Juliana to the theater… After the performance I helped her into my carriage. As we drove, I wrapped her in my embrace and gently kissed her lips. Whispering words of love, Juliana caressed my manhood. Suddenly my body began to burn with need—desire. I fought to control the beast—knowing if this continued the woman in my arms would no longer be pure.
My voice invaded her thoughts. “My love… if we continue… you will be a married woman on the morrow.”
Juliana responded by deepening our kiss—understanding fully in my words. With a thought I willed the woman in my arms to my bed—my soon-to-be bride. Gently, I removed her velvet gown. Her heart began to beat rapidly. In a single breath, my fangs pierced her flesh. The crimson liquid coated my throat—easing my burning hunger. Realizing what I had done—horror and disgust consumed me. For she was an innocent—untainted. With hands, I could not stop from shaking… I dressed Juliana with a thought, escorted her home and wiped all memories of the monster—Lucian Monroe from her mind. On this night I fully understood—I am vampire—I do not love—do not feel. I am undead—existing on the living. For I must leave my home, my family. By the fates above… please forgive me.
Lucian Monroe~

Winter ~Christmas Evening 1615~
Darkness has covered the earth; once again I awake—alone. Seven years, I have existed—as one of the undead. Never aging… falling victim to sickness—plague. I have learned to appease my hunger, my thirst for the crimson fluid. Yet I refuse to visit my family—fearing they shall discover my secret. Fearing I will destroy them—curse those I loved because of what I’ve become—vampire. Accepting I cannot live my life as before. Nor fulfill my legacy—my birthright. The shadows which haunt me are my own doing. And I shall forever pay for my mistake, hidden in the shadows. England... only honoring my country my king—from afar. For I still wonder why Kara chose me? Turned me into one of the undead—vampire. The quest I am to fulfill… For my maker speaks in riddles. Refusing to show her true self… refusing to reveal her secrets, my destiny. As the years before on this holiday once again I sense her presence. Sense her entering my lair... Perhaps on this night the beauty with ebony eyes will explain all there is. For this life has become tiresome…
Lucian Monroe~


Spring ~ 1619
On this night I rest hidden deep beneath the castle walls—their sobbing piercing my thoughts. For years my only contact with the family I left behind from afar. Vowing I’d never return after nearly taking a human life in a blinded moment of passion. Until, I received the correspondence my beloved father was dying… despite the creature I am... I needed to say goodbye—honor my duty as his son. Edward Monroe—seeing him in such pain tore at my soul as I prayed to the fates to end his suffering. April 5th 1619, the man, I respected as no other… left this world. My mother and dear sister, I sense they are slipping into a dark abyss—filled with unpleasant memories leading up to his death. My inner-self is in turmoil. Should I alter reality and ease their pain? Would I be flouting the rules of our kind? Would Kara, my creator disapprove? The vampire with-in me feels powerless—anger—for the ones I love have endured enough! Earlier this evening I held my sister as she cried. I wiped the tears from her eyes and cursed—for they no longer sparkled. Her unbearable sadness ripped my lifeless heart in two. Sensing my mother had entered the room I glanced up and swallowed. For it seemed she aged these past number of days. I drew in a breath and wrapped my arm around her. In a whispered tone, she asked if I intended to return abroad. Knowing I could not remain, knowing my existence would only cause them a much deeper pain... I kissed her cheek masking the bloodstained tears clouding my vision. May the fates watch over them… knowing before long I must leave my home once again.
Lucian Monroe~


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