LOVE MAKING Mini Series: Episode 2 Pt. 1

Could This Be…?: Part 1

Sidebar: I tell this story in hopes that it will touch the soul of two wayward lovers so that they may find their way back to each other. This tale is dedicated to the broken hearted. It is not too late to claim your happiness. All you have to do is tell that person what is truly in your heart. No fancy words, no right or wrong way. Just let it flow or let it go…


I see her face at least once a day. I hear her voice in my dreams. I catch her scent on phantom breezes when I least expect it. Drives me crazy sometimes. Don’t know what to make of it. I mean, I loved her. Loved her more than I knew how to show her. Scared me to love someone that much. If I am honest it still scares me because I’m still in love with her.

I know you’re wondering “who the hell is SHE?” And I will tell you, but first I must explain some things. Of course it was my fault. We both had our faults. But I know it was I who could’ve made a difference. That’s why she haunts me so to speak. A reminder of what I let walk out of my life. I play it off. To the world I moved on. Even found a new love. Yes, I said I’m currently with someone.

No, no now don’t judge me yet. I know I’m not the only one who lost a real love and it still bothers them later down the road. I mean I couldn’t keep beating myself up over it. Hell, I didn’t want to admit that I loved her that much. But I had to keep moving. I couldn’t stop living my life because I made a mistake. Because I messed up. She made it clear that she wasn’t coming back. So I kept it moving.

But how I felt, how I still feel, never changed. And I’m with someone else. Even asked this new love to spend the rest of her life with me. Learned to cope with seeing the eyes from the past. Learned to smile and keep it to myself when her voice floated toward me. Or when her scent filled the air around me.

Dealt with it because that’s life. And as much as I wish I had control over it, I learned over the years that some things are beyond your control.

Why does it matter now? If I had been coping and even moving on, why was I digging at the scab? Well, because she showed up. Or rather I ran across her a few weeks back. I had an assignment at Harrington General. And she is now a nurse there.

Should have seen me that day. Thought I had finally went over the edge, hallucinating and such. And could you believe she was just as shocked to see me?

Well it matters because I was going to meet her today. I don’t know what to expect. I feel so inexplicably nervous. Like maybe I’m in a dream I have yet to awaken from. Trying to be open minded, because I feel lame to be feeling this way. But that’s what makes her so different. Because she saw right through my bullshit and still loved me. Because no matter how tough I try to be, she always got through my defenses. The only woman who was able to. And haven’t met her match yet.