Pathway to god

                  Chapter one



In the small town of Derry, Maine. The feeling of change swept over the town and the unsuspecting townspeople, as the snow began to melt and the smell of spring was in the air.

Iris smiled as she pulled open her window an wrinkled her nose as the sharp cold air hit her but she smelt it she knew an waited with great anticipation that spring was definitely on its way Iris would swear she could even smelt the delicate an subtle hint as the flowers grew.

She sighed and smiled as she watched the icicles drip eagerly in the sun then closed her window and moved to her mirror to check that her waist long strawberry blonde ringlet hair was still secured in a loose ponytail, Iris stroked the light sprinkle of pink turn the ivory base colour of her skin an sighed again. Before she grabbed her school bag and threw it over her shoulder as ran out the door an straight into her father.

“Opps,” she smiled widely at her father. “Sorry Dad!”

“Where’s the fire Iris?” he frowned playfully at his little daughter

“Kit will be here in 5 minutes” she made a face at her father’s frown

He nodded slowly “got enough time for a old man hug??” he held out his arms gingerly at her

Iris rolled her eyes but threw her arms around her father’s waist an squeezed “love you Dad”

He smiled down an squeeze his daughters shoulders, “me too kid,” he sighed “off to school with you”

Iris smiled at him before taking off down the stairs an out the front door just in time to see Kit pull up in his new old car, she continued down the path of her small home an jumped into Kits open passenger door.

“Hey Iris, eager today??” Kit smiled a huge warm smile that had always been in her life for as long as she remembered an she felt her heart sing a little and it shocked her.

“Erm... yeah I told Jasper I’d meet him in the parking lot he wants to talk about something apparently.” Iris frowned a little as she looked at Kit letting her eyes wonder over his chin deep ebony hair she wondered why she never noticed the subtle golden tint that shone in the sunlight then to his strangely full of emotion blue eyes that always betrayed him when he tried to deny being upset, finally looking at his full lips still pulled up into his wide warm smile as he drove an her mind cried out wow!

Iris cringed into her seat an forced her eyes away from his face concentrating on the road almost as hard as Kit was.

Kit raised one of his black eyebrows, and took a side glance at his lifelong best friend. “What’s up??” concern filled his voice.

She raised her head “I’m fine Kit, you ok??”

Kit nodded silently, thinking to himself obviously Iris thought as the little crease between his eyes appeared as it did whenever his brain was working overtime. Iris looked out the window at the start of the season change as they pulled into the small school parking lot; the school body was made up of 370 pupils. Iris quickly got out of the car and looked around at the hundreds of familiar faces of her classmates.

Then Iris spotted him stood against his car his casual hairstyle an dress held in the highest of fashion but his face is what Iris left for last his half a smile sparkled as he spotted her his deep brown eyes filled with love as he stated towards her Iris let out a sigh of relief as it seemed she forgot the over friendly way she was thinking of her best friend as Jasper wrapped a arm casually around her slender shoulders and kissed her hair.

“Hey Kit” Jasper gave a smile to one of his closest friends

“Jasp,” he nodded as he looked round “You saw Corin?”

Jasper shook his head as he let Iris go apart from her hand as the 1st bell rang and they walked in, Kit wondered in beside them. Iris looked up at Jasper as they walked Jasper smiling proudly as he escorted her to class, Iris felt her pulse race an she smiled gently Kit ran off ahead as he spotted Corin waiting outside my 1st class for Iris.

Corin smiled shyly at Kit as he stopped by her, Corin was a small almost sickly thing of a girl with the oddest shade of gray eyes with wispy red hair and a broad smile if she allowed herself to smile fully, Iris smiled when Corin’s gray an somewhat dead eyes fell on Iris.

“Hay,” Iris smiled as they got closer “You okay?”

Corin shy smile stopped dead her squeaky voice took over “Yes, sorry I didn’t call over the weekend I got busy.”

“Not to worry Cor, you missed a good day out thought” Iris smiled

The bell rang again Iris said goodbye to Jasper who held her eyes with the adoring look the made Iris blush then she went into the class.

Kit sat next to her in this class an Corin just behind them, Iris looked at the front of the class as Kit and Corin discussed their activates over the weekend laughing, she put her head on the desk listening to the idle talk between two of her best friends, Iris sighed.

God I hate this life.... 

Iris sat up quickly as she recognised the voice, looking at Mr Tent who had appeared at the front of the class looking disgruntled like he did most days his once handsome face wrinkled and premently seemed to be in a grimace.

Iris turned to Kit looking slightly shocked “did you hear that?”

Kit smiling face filled with expectance “hear what?”

Iris frowned slightly. “nothing”

“Alright you lot Time to work a little bit” Mr Tent called the class to attention

Iris looked back to the front of the class ignoring the worried stare that burned into her face “I’m okay” Iris muttered

Mr. Tent ranted on about the egotistical behaviour of male writers in the 19th century.

At the end of the year Iris moved slowly like she was tired. She stretched and flexed her fingers then followed Kit and Corin out the class the separated going to their separate classes. Iris smiled widely as she walked into her Biology class to see her Jasper waiting for her at their desk.

She slid into her seat next to him an she smiled at him widely as he flashed a stunning half smile.

“Well, did you have a good night?” Jasper grinned pleased with himself

“Like you need to ask” Iris couldn’t help but smile back.

Jasper slipped his hand over hers an leant in an kissed her gently on her lips an sighed, an Iris blushed knowing that they were being watched by their classmates.

The rest of the day seemed to drag but when the final bell rang and the small group of friends walked out into the parking lot the blinding white of the snow had disappeared and the lush green fields and trees was showing through, Iris Smiled excitedly spring was here and the death of winter had passed, Jasper squeezed her hand feeling her excitement, walking along to his car, Iris waved at kit and Corin before getting into Jaspers car.

What a stuck up.....She has everything Jasper....Kit, What a perfect little life.....

Iris sat upright and looked at Kit’s car, Jasper looked at her concerned.

“What’s wrong Iris??” Jasper’s eyes and voice filled with anxiety and his face seemed to be in agony

Iris looked at him and forced a smile “I’m fine” her brain worked overtime what was happening to her was she going mad??



                                  Chapter two



She sat on her bed hugging her knees tightly to her chest, gently rocking herself her pale ivory face wore in a frown, while her brain ran through the options that she had... well the only option she had.



Iris shook her head an dismissed it, there was no form of mental illness in her family....well the family that she knew but hearing voices, making mean comments about her in her friend’s voice, paranoia? And who can she talk too about this, who wouldn’t think she belonged in a stray jacket maybe even undergoing electroshock therapy, Iris let out a short hysterical laugh and sighed she was over analysing this she wasn’t crazy she was....stressed yes that was it stressed...

The shrill sound of the phone ring cut through her thoughts, Iris jumped a little bit before reaching for the phone.

“Hello.” She thought her voice sounded strained.

“Iris? Are you ok?” A familiar voice asked.

Iris coughed “Yeah I’m fine,” her voice righted itself “Kit did you want something I have to get started on dinner.” That came out a little abrupt she thought.

“Well you were a little distracted today I was just checking on you” Kits voice was filled with nothing but concern

Iris sighed angrily “I’m not a baby Kit!! I don’t need checking up on,” she paused for a second then continued her rant. “Just let me be Kit I don’t need your supervision okay??” Iris slammed the phone done an instantly feeling guilty and like the worst person in the world.

She dragged herself off the bed and went down into the quaint kitchen an opened the fridge a scanned through it picking out the ingredients she needed and made a start on dinner.



Iris’s father came in just as Iris was dishing out, an instantly knew something was wrong with his daughter, he sighed as he looked at Iris push the food on her plate around the edges she hadn’t even taken a mouthful.

“Have a good day at school?” He treaded lightly

“Huh...,” Iris looked up at her father and her eyes were a little unfocused “Oh! Yeah it was fine.” Iris looked down at her plate again

“Iris? What’s wrong??” Her father pushed

Iris looked up again and sighed, “Dad I’m fine.” she stood up and put her plate on the side “Dad I have homework to do...yeah...night”

Iris all but ran out of the kitchen and up to her room slamming her door behind her, she threw herself on her bed and buried her head into a pillow and screamed.



After she’d got herself under control, Iris decided she should get on with her homework although she knew once she finished that she wouldn’t be get much of a grade for it her mind was distracted...STRESSED, she gave up trying to correct it, deciding to take a shower, Iris did feel better once she had, thinking to herself as she brushed through her long hair, that she should really apologise to Kit and her Dad.

She yawned then decided that she would apologise tomorrow and got into her cold bed, she was thankful she felt warm tonight. It wasn’t long before she drifted off to sleep, her eyes flicked as she fell deeper into her dream state the dream started vivid colours swirled starting to take shape Iris was walking through a field filled with daisies an yellow flowers she couldn’t really put a name she ran her hand over them, Iris smiled as she looked up to see Kit walking towards her, the golden tints in his ebony hair shone out in the sunlight and his mouth pulled up into that warm loving smile that made Iris heart sing as his blue eyes glistened as he got closer Iris took those last few steps an wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her head into his chest and whispered his name.

“Iris...I’ve missed you” He sighed

Iris confused looked up at Kit “Where have you been?” Her voice worried and high pitched.

Kit wrapped his arms around Iris’s little shoulders and breathed in her smell the fresh smell of apples “I had to go I’m sorry I wanted to stay with you.”

She didn’t understand where had he been?

“I can’t stay Iris they won’t let me stay” Kit’s voice was profoundly sad Iris pulled away, looking up and saw the tears on his cheeks like frozen snowflakes.

“What??, who? Of course you can stay Kit, don’t listen to them,” Iris wrapped her arms around his neck “Kit you have to stay please don’t leave me.” Her voice think with the brewing sobs

Kit just stood there his arms wrapped around Iris’s waist, the silence was uneasy but Iris couldn’t think of what to say until it was too late.

Kit pulled away, ran his thumb over the pink sprinkle of her cheek wiping away a tear before turning away from Iris, gripping his wrist trying to pull him back into her arms the sobs breaking out from her chest, but Kit ignored it walking away from her.

Iris sunk to her knees in the daisies and the strange looking yellow flowers unable to call out for Kit the sobs raking through her body, stopping her from screaming at the top on her voice for Kit her eyes blind with tears. She could sense that Kit had left her here in this field Iris closed her eyes sobbing for her lost friend where had he gone who wouldn’t let him stay she didn’t understand.

Iris’s eyes opened the tears gone along with the bright field the flowers had changed to white roses but they were in a vase as her eyes readjusted to the new background just past the white flowers to the dark stone behind it, Iris held her breath as she read the name on the engraved on it ‘Kit Turner’

She realised where she was grief ripped through her mind Kit was dead? But how she couldn’t believe it Iris raked her nails through the dirt as she screamed!



Iris shot up in her bed gasping crying she looked around at the familiar walls of her bedroom she felt the grief rip through her body and mind again. The sun shone through her room and Iris turned looking at her clock, jumping out the bed, running to the bathroom.



Iris left for school feeling uneasy about her dream, Kit was stood by his car waiting for her. The sense of loss left her knowing that there he was stood in front of her alive and well he smiled widely at her. Iris couldn’t help herself so overcome by joy that she ran at him an practically threw herself at him that he fell back against the car as Iris wound her arms around his waist Kit was a little bit taken back by this he didn’t quite know how to react, he placed his hands on her shoulders pushing Iris away a little bit an looked down at the teary green eyes looking up at him, Kit kissed her head whispering that it was ok, asking if she was ok.

Iris sniffled, nodding at him Kit smiled gently at her. After a week of not sleeping Iris really had began to think that she was going crazy the voices in her head were getting frequent, all her relationships strained Iris was slowly cutting herself off from everyone she knew it would be easier when the men in white jackets came to take her away.

Iris looked at herself in the mirror focusing on the etched purple circles under her eyes that know seem to be permanent she yawned widely.

*            *            *

After the 1st dream Iris was afraid to sleep she didn’t want to dream of a place without Kit, she did sleep the night after but this time the dream contained Jasper instead.

She woke up in the morning and although she was intensely shaken she was surprised to realise that she wasn’t as upset when it was Kit that day in school she tried to avoid Jasper. Although in biology she couldn’t when she entered the classroom Jasper was sat there smiling eagerly watching her sit down next to him, he went to put his hand over hers but Iris pulled her hand away tucking it around her arm across her chest.

Jasper let out an irritated sigh “Iris?”

Iris looked straight ahead chewing on her bottom lip, Jasper pulled his hand away, he had noticed how was looking at Kit the day before clinging to his arm, her face lighting up whenever she saw him, even though he knew that Iris and Kit wouldn’t betray him by starting a relationship behind his back he still couldn’t help feeling jealous.

“Iris, what’s going on?” Jasper asked angrily

She looked up from the desk to the front of the class “Nothing Jasper.” She felt his glare burning her face,

“You are bad liar you know Iris” Jasper barked out a humourless laugh

Iris shot a look at him “...Look I just need to be left alone okay?”

Jasper composed his face after the pain from that comment ripped through it.

Jasper composed his face after that comment sent ripples of pain through his body and face.

Time alone or with Kit!!!

Iris stiffened in her seat, looking at Jasper face on. “NO, that’s not the case.” She grabbed her books and bag before storming out the classroom.

      *            *            *

Iris sat quietly on the edge of her bed as despair hit her and Iris couldn’t help but cry.

Slowly her life began to unwind around her the threads of her life were being stretched to the limit and has begun to rip apart.