Mechanic's Hands II

The next afternoon he was walking to the grocery to pick up something for his mom when he saw her talking to Emmy and smiling. When she saw him she said goodbye to Emmy and crossed the street to him. “Hey. This is totally stupid, but I was going to look you up in the phone book and realized I don’t even know your name! I’m very embarrassed.”
“Ty. Don’t know yours either.” He didn’t know why, but it made him smile to see her, he also felt nervous about something.
“Callie.”
“Do ya like Emmy?”
“Yeah. She’s okay. I mean, I just saw her walking down the street and I wanted know where she got the pants she was wearing last night. She said she got them from Ben’s Buttons… I guess they sell more than buttons though.” She laughed at her own unfamiliarity with the town, but it was a secure laugh, like she found it genuinely funny.
“Did ya sleep good?” He hadn’t.
“No. It’s too quiet here. And very dark. I sat on the porch most the night waiting for something to happen.”
“Nothin’ happens on a Saturday night.”
“Why not. I mean, that’s the busiest night in New York, and I don’t even live in the city.”
“Church on Sunday Morning.”
“Oh.”
“Somethin’s gonna happen tonight. When the sun’s goin’ down. Gotta run, but I’ll get ya then. Okay?”
“Sounds great! See you then.” She said, and walked off towards Ben’s buttons to get a pair of pants. He was so dumbfounded by her. He had never been intrigued by a woman like this before. And he could not stop watching her walk away and wondering what it would feel like to slide up behind her.
That night at about an hour before sun set he pulled up out front of the B&B. She was sitting on the porch reading a book she had picked out from the library. She had on a pair of jeans she bought from Ben’s Buttons, and they looked like they were made for her. They were a dark color and showed off her butt and legs nicely. She also had on a pair of high heel shoes and a top that showed off her stomach. Unlike yesterday, it did not show off her breasts. The pants were a pretty low cut, so he could see the skin between her belly button and the waist of the jeans. She had looked up when he pulled up, and her hair was pulled back tonight. She looked very nice, and her face lit up in a big smile when she heard him coming.
“I didn’t know you rode a motorcycle!” She said.
“Sorry. Forgot to tell ya. Do ya not want to ride?”
“Want to! I’ve been dying to for years! I need a helmet.”
He handed one over to her, and shut off the bike. He made sure to stabilize it and told her get on like it was a horse.
“Best horse I’ve ever seen!” She said.
“Built it myself. Got the parts n everythin’ from th’ junk yard in town.”
“It’s amazing!”
He instructed her to hold on to his ribs or waist and he took off pretty slow. She loosely held on to his chest as they rolled through town, the speed limit was only twenty. But once they got to the police station he explained that they would be going much faster and she needed to hold on tight. Then he told her to give him a tighter squeeze if she was okay to go faster or if she was scared to tap him. Her whole body was laying against his, her hips pressed securely into the small of his back. He said okay into his ear, and then snaked her arms around him. Her hand lay over his navel.
Neither of them had on leather jackets, but she would let that slide. As long as they had helmets that would be fine. But the moment she slid on behind him and felt his chest in her hands she forgot all about the coats. Instead she enjoyed his body heat radiating into her chest and stomach, loved the feel of his thighs beside hers. Since it was impossible to speak, even going twenty, she simply held on and enjoyed.
It may have been his imagination but the bike seemed to vibrate differently with an extra passenger. He had taken people on his bike before, mostly girls wanting a ride. But it had never felt this way before. He could feel her breath on the back of his neck; it was a sharp contrast to the cool air whipping his face. Most times she just put her head on his back, he assumed to avoid the wind, and he felt self-conscious of how fast his heart was beating and how rapidly he had starting to breathe. Her hands, as they left town, were at his chest, but each time she became more comfortable with the speed her arms would drop lower. She kept squeezing him too. He had thought she would be afraid but she seemed to love the thrill. He hit 30, eased into 40 and then she squeezed him again. Her arms were under his rib cage and her hands almost hit his belt. He crept into fifty five and the she tapped his stomach, right over his navel. He felt his stomach turn as if he had just skipped a step. She must have realized how low her hands had fallen because she raised them to just below his ribs again and they did not move until they hit the interstate. He stopped about five minutes away from the interstate and explained that to turn he would have to lean the bike pretty low. He would take it slow, but it was a sharp turn and it was a far lean. She nodded and squeezed a little tighter.
As they rounded the corner she screamed and squeezed him quite tight. But when it was over she must have felt it was less scary than before because her hands dropped and sat on his hips the rest of the ride. He could barely focus on the road, between the vibration of the bike, her breath on his neck, and her hands on his hips he was distracted. They soon reached their destination. He pulled off the road a short way away from the intersection of the highway and parked the bike. His ears were ringing, but he wasn’t sure if it was a motor or something else. She seemed a bit quiet herself.
“So, what are we doing here?” She asked, looking around.
He flipped on the headlight on his bike and leaned against it. “They race cars.”
“Who’s they?” She asked, staring at the sunset.
“Boys from th’ garage, n from th’ other town.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, built their car. Th’ race is from three miles before here to five miles outside town. Mine’s the one in front” She knew he was referencing the big town, where her grandmother lived.
“You built it?”
“Nah. They won it. I tweaked it.” He grinned as the ground beneath their feet started to vibrate. She heard it before she saw it. A loud exhaust and a high RPM. “Mine hits 300.” She just stared at him dumbfounded.
“If they lose, do the other kids get your car?”
“Nah. Only did that once. Tol’ ‘em if they lose my car, I’m not makin ‘em a new one.”
The last few word were drown out by an old orange Honda peeling past them at 275 miles an hour. Seconds behind them was the competition. Her hair was blown into her face, her ponytail completely sideways for a moment. She loved the rush and the speed. And she watched him as they went by. He had his eyes closed and arms spread, just letting the air whip around him and blow his shirt taunt to the side of his body. After the past she asked him, “How did you know yours was in front?”
“Th’ sound.” He said, his eyes still closed. “Know th’ sound n’ vibrations better than my heart.” He grinned a big grin at her, one that looked like he was truly letting go of his nerves, and laughed,”Plus – faster ‘n anythin’ out there.” At that she laughed at the cocky side of him, happy to see it.
Something possessed her to walk over to him and just touch him. She wanted to feel his skin again. He was still propped against his parked bike but his arms had dropped into his lap. She went and put her hands on each of shoulders, then ran them half way to his elbows. He had closed his eyes again, but this time out of nerves rather than joy. “How can you be so cocky and have such great humor when you talk about your cars – but then, with me, you are so shy and reserved?”
He just looked at the ground, not even meeting her gaze. “Come on Ty. I want to know what the deal is. Do you not like me?” She asked. What she meant to say was Do I not turn you on, make you curious, make you laugh, do you not enjoy my company at all. Is there something about me that makes you uncomfortable? But it had just come out a childish question about if he liked her. Hadn’t he invited her out here to show her something he was proud of? The disgust in herself at the question, as well as her fear of rejection made her let go and take a step back. She had never been afraid of rejection. Ever. She was the one who asked out someone she liked. She was the one who had one night stands. She was the one who knew she was great and worth it. But something about him threw her off just a bit. Like it really mattered if he enjoyed the person she was. It had never mattered in the past. She had friends, and money, and things, and a nice car. She had always found pride in herself, her causes, and her financial security. But something about him made all that seem like nothing, he was what mattered right now.
When she had let go of him he looked at her face for the first time since he had picked her up. He rubbed his palms on his thighs, then stood up and took a step towards her. He held out his hands and went to grab her in the same way she had been holding him, but he stopped, hesitating mid air. Then he reached out and grabbed her hands. He looked her dead in the eyes then. It had gotten completely black in the desert; the only light was from his bike headlight. They were standing to the side of it, casting a faint glow over themselves, but her face was obscured by his shadow.
“Girls don’ like me. I mean. Uh. I do somthin’ wrong. No. I.” He took a deep breath to collect himself. “Half th’ girls in this town been out with me. N it ain’t never lasted. I like cars too much. I talk bad. I ain’t good in school. My hands is bad. One girl I got grease on by mistake, she still ain’t talkin’ to me. N another ain’t like my hands, said they was always dirty and rough. I’m fun at first cause my cars n’ my bikes go fast, but it ain’t what they like. N’ they just girls from town. You’re gonna be a doctor. You talk real good, n’ you real confidant. N’ you’re gonna go help people all over the world. I ain’t ever been outta this state. N’ you gotta lot of money. I ain’t never gonna have money. What I like doin’ is cheap work. Ya go to an ivy league school n’ I barely graduated.” He started to sound very upset and she could hear the emotion in his voice. “That n’ I only known ya two days n’ I’m crazy about ya! I mean, I get all nervous n’ stuff n’ I don’t even know why half the time. I’m afraid ya gonna realize there ain’t nothin’ more to me than fast cars.” He dropped his arms and put his hands in his pockets.
They stood that way for a moment until she stepped closer to him and started to speak, but not touch him. “Don’t you think you’re being unfair to both of us by deciding how I will feel? I know all that about you, and I know all that about me. But maybe I’ve thought about that and I’m still attracted to you. Maybe I’m still happy to see you. Maybe I see something in you that you obviously don’t.” When she had finished he walked over to her and gave her a genuine hug. It was platonic and meant to be a comfort to himself. It was the first time they had been that close face to face. Their bodies were touching from shoulder to hip. He was about a head taller than her, so as she hugged back her arms snaked around the small of his back. He put his mouth to her ear and said, “Ya make me feel good ‘bout myself and bad ‘bout myself all at once.” She used this opportunity to kiss his cheek, but he moved to kiss her full on the mouth. It shot an electric jolt throughout his body and have him goose bumps while at the same time warming his chest and making it feel tight. He pulled away but she put her hand to his face and pulled him back for a second kiss. This time she kissed him on the bottom lip and leaned her body into him. His hands moved down her back and around to her sides where he touched her bare skin. The heat of his hand seemed very intense, and then suddenly he pulled away and said they should go home.
The bike ride home was long and awkward. All she wanted was to press her body against his once more, to feel his skin and body heat, but something had repelled him and made him withdraw completely and she was afraid to do any of it. She did her best to hold on to just his sides or near his shoulders. Finally, as she saw the lights of the town ahead she decided to see how he felt once and for all. Her hands were resting on his chest, so she pressed her body into his so as not to fall off, and slid her hands down the length of his sides and onto his outer thigh. She let her hands rest on top of his jean pockets and waited to see what he would do. She had seen him scratch his face on the ride out, so she knew he could ride one handed and move her hand. Instead he leaned back into her slightly and slowed the bike enough to touch her hand. He did not move it, only lightly touched it until they pulled into town. At the B&B she climbed off without a word and walked into the house. Instead of turning on a light or going upstairs she looked out the window and watched him sit out front for a full minute before pulling away.


By the next afternoon she had not heard from him at all and was worried that she had done something wrong. At three o’clock she was in the kitchen making lunch when she heard a knock at the door. Thinking it was him she hurried to the front of the house but it was just the red headed kid. “Oh, hi.” She said.
“Its Tom remember?”
“Yes, thank you Tom for carrying my bags Saturday, I appreciate it.”
“Yup. Your mom here?”
“Oh, no Tom. She isn’t. I forgot to tell you that she left early Sunday afternoon. She is in the town with my grandmother about a half hour away. Why, do you need something?”
“Car’s busted. We need a new engine. The piston went through it n’ it’ll take till probably Friday to fix. Got a new radiator on order too.”
“Okay. Thank you Tom. Tell you what. Tell Tony I said to go ahead, that my mom left me some money to pay for the repairs and get home. But she couldn’t stay, she was too busy. “
“Ok. Is Holly here?”
“Sorry Tom. Holly left me a note that a relative is sick. She left early this morning and wont be back until tomorrow afternoon. She left instructions for paying if I needed to leave today, and told me to stay as long as I needed. I’m the only one here. Is there something you need from Holly?”
“Nah – she just gives me a glassa cold milk when I come by.”
“Well, would you like to come in for a glass of milk real quick? I am just making myself some lunch.”
“Sure. Its kinda funny though.”
“What the milk?”
“Nah. Ty. He say that your mom’s gonna be here, but you had to leave for a trip. N’ Holly didn’t tell no one she was goin’.”
“Guess you got mixed messages all around, huh?”
“Yup.” After Tom left she went back to making her lunch and channel surfing. Holly had some form of satellite or cable TV, so she just watched cooking and home make over shows. After a while she went back to reading the book from the library that she had picked up Saturday. It seemed that nothing was open in town on Sundays, apparently everyone went to church. At about six she took a shower and put on some pajamas. She was in the kitchen cooking dinner when she heard another knock on the door. She pulled her robe tight and worried that it may be someone wanting to stay in the B&B an she regretted not putting up a “closed” sign until Holly’s return. It had still shocked her that Holly just left her there with a note on how to pay and what to do while she was alone. She was still trying to get used to small town life. The person knocked again, a bit harder this time. Jolted from her thoughts she cinched her robe and went to the door.
“Ty.” She was shocked to see him. She thought that he was upset with her for pushing it last night on the bike and didn’t want to see her again. She unlocked the screen door lock and he kicked off his shoes and stepped in. She took a step back to give him space.
“Tommy said you was here.”
“Yes. Why wouldn’t I be?”
“I thought you was goin’ on vacation. Maui or somthin’?”
“Oh yes. Well, I changed my holiday plans. I am staying here.”
“Cause of th’ car?”
“What? Oh. No. That’s my mother’s car. I drive a crappy little VW that’s parked in Rhode Island.”
“Oh.” He didn’t want to let himself believe that she had called off Maui for him. He was sure it was for the car.
“Well, now that my mom dumped the car on me, I do have to take it back to New York, so I will probably leave as soon as it is done, but I plan to say until then. Did you want some dinner? I was just getting ready to make something.”
“I jus’ got off work.” She could see he was covered in sweat and grease. And his jumpsuit was wet on one knee.
“You can shower here. There is a shower in every room. And I believe Holly keeps a change of clothes incase someone needs a pair.”
“Nah. I’m not stayin’ here.”
“Holly’s gone and its just me. Go on up to my room, first on the left. I know I’ve seen a pair of pants somewhere around here.”
After a few more minutes of coaxing he went upstairs to shower and she found the pair of pants. Each room had a closing door to a private bathroom, so she set the pants on her bed and went back downstairs to make pancakes. He took a while in the shower, and by the time he was done she had made pancakes and eggs, and brewed a half pot of decaf coffee. They sat down to a very quiet dinner where he told her about the progress on the car. He looked very nice in the sweat pants that she found for him, but he didn’t have a top. He had put all his things in the wash once he was out of the shower and planned on leaving when they were clean.
“Why’d you come tonight Ty?”
“Ya never mix words, do ya?” He smiled up at her from taking a drink, and she had to grin back. She had learned back in high school that being coy and innocent and willing a guy your way never worked. She had also learned from her father that you cannot mince words in business. She knew he would answer her, but he would need a minute. “Tommy said you was here n’ not your mom.”
“You didn’t believe him?”
“Nah, I did.”
“Then why investigate for yourself?”
He put his fork down and abandoned his food completely. “I don’ know why. I just felt like if you was in town I had to be with ya.” The sentence got quieter the more he said. She knew better than to speak now, she hoped he would reveal more, but didn’t think he would. “From th’ time ya challenged me on the highway I wanted more.” At this he turned pink, and she didn’t have the faintest clue why.
“More?” She too had lost her appetite for dinner.
“More.” He took a big swig of coffee and looked her dead in the face. “More of ya. More of ya voice, more of ya ideas, more of ya company, more of ya…” The last word was lost by the tone of the washer. He jumped up like he’d been bit and put his clothes in the dryer than came back to the table.
“More of my what?”
“How come ya didn’ go with your mom?”
“We had plans. I wanted to be with you. What else did you want more of?”
This time he didn’t look at her. “… more of ya body.” He blushed a deep red and studied his hands. “N’ ever since last night I keep wantin’ more of that too.”
“More what?” She needed to know exactly what he wanted so that she didn’t over step her bounds and offend him.
“More of you! Ya body, ya support, the way I feel. Ya make me feel better about bein’ me.”
“That’s funny, cause you do the opposite to me. Whereas I give you confidence to be the wonderful person you are, you make me think I’m not so wonderful if I don’t have you around. Like I’m even better when you’re with me.”
“I’m tha’ important to ya huh? Not just a boy with a fast car?” There was a small smile on his face, but it didn’t reach his eyes.
“A lot more.” Her robe had slipped apart and even though she had on a t-shit and shots she wasn’t wearing a bra. He could see one of her bare breasts beneath the thin cotton and the combination of what they were talking about and how she looked right then compelled him to kiss her. He kissed her hard on the mouth, and held her sides. She leaned into him and ran her fingers through his hair, escalating the kiss. Just as he started to hold onto her hips she pulled away and looked at him. “How much more of me do you want?” She asked.


He had groaned slightly and kissed her again. And next thing she knew they were upstairs. She was leaning against a wall as he kissed her and slowly he slid the robe off her shoulders and to the floor. She could feel him start to hold back all the sudden as if he wasn’t so sure. She stopped for a minute and spoke into his ear. She knew that if she looked him in the eye she couldn’t say what was running through her head. “I’ve done this before. It’s never felt like this.” What she meant was to say that she’s had one night stands, and she’s slept with people on third dates, but never had she felt this way about what was going to happen. It had come out wrong and she sounded like a slut, and she had never cared before if she sounded like that.
“Um-hm.” He agreed with her, and nodded into her shoulder. To break the pause she started to rub his back and pull him against her. He readily obliged and then guided her to the bed. She stopped him to ask if he had anything, then pulled a condom out of her luggage. And sat back down on the bed.
Nothing had ever felt like this before. There was some form of a connection, of a chemistry. It was as if they were fulfilling something that had been hovering between them since they met.


In the morning she woke first to find his back to her. She ran her fingers up and down his spine and across his shoulder blades until he woke up. He rolled over and smiled at her, pulling her to him. He rolled over to check the time and then groaned. He gave her a long kiss and sat up.
“Going so soon?”She asked, trying to sound coy, but truly worried that the groan was of displeasure with what had happened.
“Work.” He said and went into the bathroom. After a moment he stuck his head out and asked if he could shower.
“Yeah.“ She said and rolled over. By the way he hid behind the door she could tell that he would not want her to join him in the shower. When he was dressed he came back up to her room and knocked on the door.
Halfway uncovered she said, “Come in.” He came in and just looked at her for a moment.
“Gotta work.” He said again.
“I know.” She said with a laugh.
“Tellin’ myself.” Then he burst into a big grin. “We close round 7, 8. When its dark.”
“Okay.” She didn’t know how this would go. It would either become a one night stand and he’d hide out until she left, or it would turn into something else. She didn’t know what, but this was the first time she was worried it wouldn’t be more. In the past there had been guys she liked, that she didn’t just want a one night stand with. But this time it mattered, this time it upset her to think it wouldn’t be more.
“See ya then?”
“Yes.” Not a one night stand. For some reason she breathed a sigh of relief.
She spent the day packing up her things and straightening her room. It was Tuesday and she hoped to stay at least another three days, but if Holly came back she didn’t want her to find the room in this condition. She did the sheets in her room and cleaned up the house best she could. That afternoon she went into the drug store and bought a few more condoms, to be optimistic, and got another book from the library. She was amazed at the staying power that Ty had. Any other time she would become attracted or infatuated with a guy, but after they had sex would move on. Or they would casually date for a few weeks and she would become bored. But with Ty she didn’t understand how she had already spent time with him, but still wanted more time. And not just sex. She wanted dinner, and afternoons together, and time to talk. She wanted everything she could get with the man, even if it was just a silent ride on his bike.
He had wondered around work in a slight daze and ended up burning himself on the radiator. He could not get her off his mind. He had never been with a girl long enough for it to materialize into a relationship. Usually that first morning together was quiet. He would hurry to work, and at some point during the day the girl would call to cancel plans, if they had made any. If he didn’t say anything, the girl never did. Or they would ask to see him again, but would come with lotion, or offer a manicure, or say they could only see him on Sundays when he didn’t work. If she stick around a few weeks she complained that he worked from ten to dark all week, from eleven to five on Saturdays and spent his Sunday nights tinkering with cars and racing them. She would complain that his clothes always smelled of grease and silicon spray and, that his hands always had grease on them, even when he washed them. Or they would say he was wonderful and then never call again. They would always correct his speech and tell him to pick up a book. By five o’clock he thought he was in the home stretch, she hadn’t called yet and he still planned on seeing her. But then Tommy called out from the office that he had a phone call.
“Take a message.” He yelled. This was the first time that he had been very upset by it. Usually he was upset because the girl was very pleasureable, or they had been seeing each other a few times and he enjoyed her company, but he always expected them to call and cancle and it never really bothered him when they did. But this made him angry and sad and for some reason a little bit scared all at once.
“Says she’s gotta talk to you!” Tommy hollered.
This was new. He went in and picked up the phone, “Meet me at the café, bring your bike.” Was all she said, then she hung up. He went back to work a little startled and ended up breaking off a bolt that was rusted shut and needed some grease first. Tony sent him home a little early, at six, joking that if he kept burning himself and breaking shit he wasn’t allowed back till Lexus Girl left. He went home and took his time showering and cleaning up. He made sure to shave his face clean, because girls always complained about his hands, but never about his stubble. He could control that. At seven thirty he arrived at the café, and she arrived a half hour later.
“You’re so early! Or am I late?”
“Tony let me off early. Broke a bolt n did this,” he flashed his knuckle at her, “Said if I don’t quit I aint workin’ till you leave.” Then he made sure to smile so she knew it was all a joke.
She laughed and then said, “My plan is working, soon you’ll get the day off!” He could tell it was just in fun, but deep down he wished he did have the day off. It was the first time in close to ten years that he had wanted a day off from working on cars.
It was a very quiet dinner, she knew it would be, he didn’t speak much. But that was okay, she didn’t know why – it had never been okay to be quiet on a date before, but tonight, with him, it was okay. After dinner they got on the bike and he realized she had a rather large bag with her he strapped it to the back of the bike and then coasted out of town. Once they past the police station he kicked it up to thirty five and coasted for a moment. She took her fingertips and slid them down into the waist of his jeans, which made him accidently shift into fourth. She laughed, but didn’t move, and they rode the whole way to the highway like that. He stopped at the intersection and asked where to, since this was her idea.
“Go that direction and make this bike go as fast as it can.” She then moved her arms to his ribcage and genuinely held on. They hit about 110 and coasted there for a minute and ended up close to six miles out of town. She had gotten pretty scared once they hit eighty, but she told him not to stop, and she screamed continuously from ninety on. To be honest, he had gotten a little nervous himself, he had never passed 95. It was almost dusk by the time they settled down off the road. He had his light on and she spread out a blanket and small pillow. She told him to lay on his stomach and she gave him a back rub, then, after it was dark, asked to switch. As he was straightening up she lay down and when he went to touch her he realized she had removed her top. He had touched her shoulder and noticed her top was off, and was very anxious to continue without her having a shirt on. But she lay perfectly still and didn’t move until he had massaged her entire back for a good five minutes. Then she rolled over and pulled him down over her. They kissed for a while before it started to get intense, then she patted his thigh and told him to keep it in, that tomorrow was another day. She thanked him for the wonderful backrub and they had a leisurely ride home. Close to town she gently bit him on the shoulder and the combination of the bite and the motor on the bike kept him up most the night.
The next day he worked very hard and kept his focus knowing what was ahead. What had startled him the most about the night before was that he was completely content to just spent some time out in the desert with her. Nothing had to happen, nothing special needed to be done; he realized that he would be perfectly content sitting on a couch with her all night long and not doing anything else. Or he would be happy spending a night in the town down the interstate dancing and going to movies and then going to a hotel. Either would satisfy him equally. The same thing had occurred to her, only it seemed to her that she need not be someone else. It was not necessary to be smart like when she went out with a guy from school, nor did she need to be funny or “on” all the time. He was just perfectly content for her to be her, even when she was blunt. Holly was back and everything was going as usual so she was uncomfortable inviting him over. Even if they didn’t have sex she still felt as if she were intruding on Holly’s home. And Holly had known him since he was a boy. Instead he called her at about two and told her a friend from the garage was going out of town and he could use the guy’s place for the night. He walked straight up from work, since it was on his way, and took her into the communities to the left of the church.
The streets were lined with old trees and even older Victorian homes. He explained that they got smaller as you moved further away from main street, until they ended up in at a one bedroom ranch at the very end of a block. This was the friends home, and he told Ty that it was cleaned up incase someone wanted to use it. Ty explained to her that they all grew up together and had been working together for almost ten years, it was as if they were brothers more than friends. This being said they usually lent their homes out to friends who where living with roommates or still living at home, so give the guy a nice quiet night to himself. They made a box of macaroni and cheese for dinner, and warmed up some green beans.
“Ty, what is going on with us?” it sounded harsh out loud, but it was an innocent question to her.
“We’re eatin’ mac-n-cheese in someone’s house.” He said, and smiled at her. She smiled back and waited for a serious reply. He stabbed his macaroni harder than needed and said, “Don’t know. Ain’t never felt this way bout someone. Aint never wanted the stuff I want from you.”
“What do you want.”
“More.”
“We’ve had this conversation.”
“Nah, I mean it. More n’ what I got. Guess I’m a selfish man.”
“And what do you have?”
“Got the girl o’ my dreams for the next day n a half.”
“What about after the next day and a half?”
“Got dreams.”
“Okay… what do you have right now?”
“Got a girl who I l—like,” he drew out the “l” and took a big swig of water, then he was quiet for a minute. “Girl who likes me. Girl who makes me like me.”
“Is that all?”
“All I can ever want n’ need. Why? What do you got?”
“I have a man who likes me, who I think I may be… Someone who makes me happy. Someone I don’t want to leave.”
“Say it.”
“Say what?”
“What you’re really feelin’.”
“Why? You didn’t.”
“Fine.” At this he put down his fork and looked her dead in the eye. “I got a girl who I can’ get off my mind. A woman who got me so discracted I’mma makin’ mistakes I ain’t made in more n’ seven years. I aint sleepin’ at night less she with me, n when I’m with her all I dos think about next time I get to be with her. I got a girl that so inside my head aint know which ways up n’ down. Girl I only known four n’ a half days n got me thinking I don’t wanna know no one else.” He look was almost defiant, as if daring her to not run off scared.
“I agree.” Was all she said. She returned to her plate but in a moment he was holding her elbow, standing her up to face him.
“You ‘gree with what?” Now his gase was soft and longing, but his face was hard and guarded.
“I agree that I have found a person that I think I’m in love with but whom I have only known four days. I know most the lunch meat in my fridge longer than that, but I don’t want to know anyone else.”
Something in him made him insatiable all of the sudden. He couldn’t kiss and touch her enough. She ended up sitting back down and he was on his knees kissing her and running his hands over her. He would break every now and then, “Ya mean it?” “Ya aint bored?” “Ya like my cars?” “Ya like my job?” “Ya like my hands?” At this she stopped and took his right hand in both of hers.
“See, look at this. Do you see how square your hands are? How they are nice and masculine, how long your fingers are?” Then she lay her hand in his and asked, “See how big they are? One day you will hold a son with these hands, teach him to throw ball and how to work on cars. Then you’ll have a little greasy five year old that will need a bath every night before dinner just like his dad. These hands will put a ring on a woman’s finger, they’ll unlock the door to your first house, they’re repair countless cars. And when your sixty years old you’ll probably be able to stick a nail three millimeters into them without problem, but they’ll have a lifetime of work and joy in them. “ The she gently pushed him back onto the kitchen floor and stradled his hips. Sitting back on him she proceded to suck and lick each finger individually until he was unbuttoning her top.


They spent the evening enjoying each other and resting. Thursday morning she got up early and straightened up the house. After that she woke him up and they went to breakfast at the diner. After breakfast she kissed him goodbye and he went to work.
At two in the afternoon she was in the library reading when he came in and was walking very determinedly with his shoulders curled. The sight of him upset made her scared, but she didn’t know why. She set her book down and hurried over to him and saw that his eyes were very glassy. Fearing someone had gotten hurt she took his hand and lead him outback to the courtyard so they could speak properly.
“What is wrong?”
“Car’s done.” His voice was very horse.
“My – my mom’s car is fixed?”
He nodded. “Tony let me off early. Holly said you was here.”
“Yes, I was just reading. So, um. What next?”
He just held her hand and stared at his feet.
“Money. I need to pay you guys. Here, come back to Holly’s with me, I’ll get my wallet.”
Back at the B&B she left him downstairs while she went to her room. She got her wallet and went back downstairs. She heard Holly and Ty talking, and walked onto the porch to wait for him. After about ten minutes he came out looking a little better.
“Say’s ya already paid for th’ nite.”
“Oh, yes. I did. I forgot about that.”
“Say’s I can get a room there too.” He got a shy smile on his face and his ears turned a light pink.
“What for tonight? That sounds like it could be fun.” She winked at him and took his hand. They walked to the garage and someone offered her a towel to clean her hand with. The total was three thousand dollars, but she paid four in cash to fix the truck. They spent the rest of the afternoon together looking through the shops in town and then called it an early night. Neither were hungry, so they just went to her room and lay down on the bed. He held her very tight to him, and she could feel his body heat radiating through her clothes.
“Whats gonna happen?”
“When?”
“Now.”
“We’re going to stay together for the night.”
“T’morrow.”
“I hate to but I must leave before noon to get back to New York.”
“Then what?” She was at a loss for what would happen once she got back to Brown. “Exactly.” He didn’t move at all, but his voice changed. “It’s what I said. You’re gonna be a doctor. I fix cars. Ya gonna see the world. I ain’t never lef’ the state. Ya gonna….”
“I’m going to be with you. I don’t got to school this summer. And in the fall, maybe you can go with me to see the world. We will have to wait and see what will make each of us happy then. “
“Gon’ be a long time before we see each other.”
“No, just ten weeks of school. Two and a half months.”
“Yeah?”
“Yes.” She had been drawing little circles on his stomach around his belly button, but he moved her hand to his chest and just held it. They fell asleep that way.


She was completely packed and the back of her mother’s car was loaded up. She said goodbye to Holly and Emmy, and Ty followed her to the interstate. She parked her car and got out and he hopped of his bike and just stood there, staring at her. She was more beautiful than the he first saw her, almost at this very spot. He had been attracted to her then, but didn’t know that she’d make him feel alive, scared, happy, and sad all at once. As she walked he watched her heals kick up dust, followed the long line to her belt and belly button. He looked up to her breasts which bounced as she walked, and then to her hair, swaying with each step. He stared longest at her face, the sad smile she presented as she approached him. She leaned into his arms and pressed her body against him as much as possible, as if she had to touch all of him. She nessled her face in his neck and just held on for a moment.
Earlier that morning she had given him her address and phone number the same time he had tried to give her his. The swapped information and pictures, then ate a light breakfast. Now, at 11:45 in the morning she was in his arms once more. “I need to go.”
“I know.”
“Reminding myself.” She gave him a long kiss goodbye and promised that she’d be back in exactly ten weeks, if not less.
“Now what?” He asked.
“I’ll call you Sunday when I’m back at school.”