humorous short stories chronicling fictional historic figures and events. |
William Seymour, the 16th century explorer is noted for being the first to record the eating of horse during one of his disastrous expeditions: "My dearest Millie,as i write this letter i fear i may never see you again.The men's moral is at a low and our strength and will to continue is being questioned .We haven't eaten in days and furthermore my trusted companion Winchester has injured his leg and i fear it may soon be the end for him.Winchester has been the best horse a man could ask for,loyal,strong and thoughtful.I am truly being tested by the almighty,and wonder how i will see this through..may your thoughts and heart be with me and my men.Your love William "My dearest Millie,today as i write you,our fortunes have been remarkably reversed. My trusted horse Winchester was relieved of his misery yesterday.It was devastating to have to part with a good friend and companion.After dispatching my horse,some of the men suggested we eat my beloved hoofed friend.At first i attempted to stop them but was overpowered by my sheer exhaustion.As the men happily cooked and ate Winchester i begrudgingly took my ration of the maned beast and found him delicious!! .After our scrumptious meal,we sat around the fire laughing and telling stories under the clear night skies,the full moon illuminating our full round belly's. I know now that Winchester was a dear friend in life and death and now I think we have a chance to continue and survive." William Seymour is also the first to record the eating of humans on the same disastrous expedition: "My dearest Millie,today as i write this letter i fear i may not see you again.The moral is again at an all time low and we haven't eaten anything since poor Winchester yesterday.My trusted captain Frederick has injured his leg and i fear it may soon be the end of him.Frederick has been the best officer and friend a man could ask for.Loyal,strong and thoughtful.I am again being tested by the almighty and wonder if we can see through these dark times.May your heart and thoughts be with me and my men.Love William" "My dearest Millie,today as i write to you,our fortunes have changed.We have a sense of hope.Yesterday my dear captain and friend Frederick was relieved of his misery.It was with great sadness that i was forced to do what no one else was willing to do.Frederick was a dear friend whom i had known since childhood,he would have done the same for me.After doing the wretched deed ,i prepared to bury my comrade but some of the men suggested we should eat my captain.We were starving to death,and had been lost and out of supplies for 3 days!. I tried to stop this devilish deed but was overpowered by the men ,desperate in their hunger,resorting to true animal instincts in the will to stay alive.I reluctantly accepted my ration of Frederick and found him delicious!! After our scrumptious meal,we sat around the fire laughing and sharing stories of captain Frederick under the clear night skies.I realize now that Frederick was a dear friend in life and death and we think we have a chance to continue and survive." Love William Commander William Seymour is probably best known for his brave trek into the Arctic in search of the illusive Shangri- la Island. While most explorers of the time were trying to reach the north pole,Seymour believed there was a tropical island,hidden by ice mountains and a perpetual fog cloud. Although many experts thought Seymour was foolish for thinking such an island could exist at such a northern latitude,many more thought that the experts were being too hard of William ,and urged the Royal Navy to fund the largest and most expensive expedition of its time: Letter to the editor London Gazette March 21,1654: "Dear sirs,We,the senior members of the Royal Birding Society,strongly recommend the approval of our celebrated hero Commander William Seymour's quest to find the illusive Shangri-La island in the Canadian Arctic.Our members believe (and most of our friends too) that the Arctic is a cold barren wasteland of no value to England and therefor if this tropical island of Shangri-La can be found in this god forsaken place,it would bring the mother county yet another jewel for its ever expanding crown and may hold with in it many new and beautiful birds. Commander William Seymour had originally intended to bring horse with him on his expedition to Shangri-la,but after word was leaked out of his plans,some members of the public were outraged: "Dear Sirs,We the member of the Royal Horse and Donkey Club are strongly opposed to Commander William Seymour's plans to bring horses on his expedition to Shangri-la Island.Surely the public hasn't forgotten the fate of Commander Seymour's prized steed Winchester on his last disastrous expedition to Scotland, not to mention half his crew.Although the goal of reaching the illusive Shangri-la Island is a noble one,we feel it is to dangerous to risk another fine horse." Seymour's grand expedition was now in jeopardy,as public opinion seemed to support the horse and donkey club.But Seymour was not done yet: "Dear sirs,as commander of the Royal Shangri -La Expedition, I am aware of the reservations of some members of the public over my plans for using horse for our journey.I too am concerned for the safety of these fine animals and would never wish to cause them harm.But as Englishmen,what example would we be setting for the natives of an undiscovered country,to march in,on foot,as opposed to our noble steeds,surely this would lower us to that of savages who had no right to command the respect we surely deserve" Seymour never had any intention of marching the horses across the frozen arctic to Shangri-La Island.He had designed extra-large sledges that would carry the horses'.Each horse would be pulled by four men,who would also have ninety pound rations on their backs. "I further declare that i had no intention of using the horses on our grinding friggid trek to Shangri-la,this would make our quest easier and as British Men we must complete our task with British strength and courage.We will pull our supplies and we will pull our horses through the Arctic to Shangri-la using our sheer British strength and will power". Commander Seymour won over the hearts of the pubic and the horse and donkey club and set sail for the Arctic Circle the next spring. The Shangri-la Island Arctic Expedition,left London on October 24/1654.This was the last time anyone was to see of the ship and her crew.Many experts questioned why the expedition would leave so late in the year,when darkness and freezing conditions were sure await the brave explorer's when they reached Baffin island. The ship had been equipped with rations that were to last at least three weeks,William Seymour was sure they would only need one week of rations before they found Shangri-La island.He had been criticized after his last expedition for bringing enough rations for three years on his trek into the highlands of Scotland on his disastrous Scotland expedition.He had brought so much food that after the second day the men had only managed to travel a half a mile into the outskirts of London, most of the rations lost that night outside a pub as the men drank inside. Over the years search parties were sent to find William Seymour and his brave crew. Many theories have been theorized about the fate of the expedition.Most experts agreed that William Seymour and his men indeed found Shangri-la Island and decided to stay there,probably being treated like kings and taking native wives.Living the rest of their noble lives in paradise. |