Love Song for the Let Down

It begins
I touch my best friend’s legs
i feel her squirm beneath my touch
but this lack of all sensation
is becoming far too much
so i wash my little conscience
in the stream beneath your eyes
before i go back to the streets
and spead another pair of thighs
oh but i watch our videos
how they remind me of the times
when everything was perfect
and we were lying there entwined
inside the satin silk serenity
of your intrinsic kiss
i can not live like this forever
i swear i’ll soon be done with it

Oh no
I have made plans
and you were in them
always
these are my ways
lover what can i say

and it goes
I call some young girl’s number
but i can’t remember why
until i hear myself asking her
just what she’s doing tonight
and would she like to drop by my place
for a smoke a drink or fuck
maybe if she says all three
someone will say that i’m in luck
it’s a hollow satisfaction
to strip the clothing off her skin
i was standing by the edge too long
i guess i finally just fell in
now i’m choking from the gall
and i’m swinging from the rope
i just wanted to feel alive
i have killed off all our hopes

oh god
i have made plans
and you were in them
always
these are my ways
lover what can i say
I have made plans
you will have a place
so where will you stay

oh no
i touch my best friend’s legs
no no
i touch my best friend’s legs
oh please
i touch my best friend’s legs
stop me
i touch my best friend’s legs
I finger backlit numbers
on my shitty telephone
i guess i always knew
that in the end i’d be alone
so i guess i’ll smoke my brains out
i don’t need them anyway
i’ll never figure out why
i’ve made this bed in which i lay
i will choke down all this junk food
that tastes just like ash to me
and i’ll let my eyes keep draining
until they’re empty just like me
i’ll remember every laugh
and every single joke you told
but now that all is said and done
i hope i die before i’m old

but i
I have made plans
and you were in them
always
these are my ways
lover what can i say
i have made plans
you will have a place
so where will you stay
baby