Change Is Real (Auto-Biography) Part 3

There was a level system at South Wood and the higher you were, the more privileges you get. We would go on an outing once a week usually to the movies and we get a weekly allowance that would be kept stored until we wanted to use it for an outing or at the vending machine. You were not allowed to keep money or anything valuable on because of people breaking or stealing, but if that were to happen its not South Woods responsibility. We would just play cards all day or video games,I remember I brought in my Nintendo Gamecube in and was playing Zelda Wind Waker and one of the staff members Mr. Justin always wanted to play it.I think he had a thing for Mrs. Jamie but I was so obsessed with her and she knew it because I would memorize her weekly schedule and if she was a minute late I would ask him where she was at, he thought it was creepy. When ever she would come in the door I would run and give her a hug and smell her. I remember during the summer right before my birth day there was the National Olympics which consisted of a lot of challenges and prized for doing the most in various things.Travis thought he was the best at everything and there was a sit up contest and I won, I did sixty three in about five minutes and he only did fifty eight, but he did the most push ups. I was real good friends with JR though and Travis was just a bad influence anyway. I spent Christmas at South Wood and almost my birthday there as well but lucky I got to spend the day at home for a home visit. I ended up staying at South Wood for nine months and instead of going back to David E.Williams I just commuted from Lynda's to South Wood for school every day. I was happy to go and see Mrs. Jamie everyday.

My sisters and Peggy were still living with us but they eventually got a house down the street from us and they all lived there and Peggy had anew boyfriend. While being in South Wood Lynda told me that Peggy brought some Mexicans over and she was dating a fifteen year old and she was thirty four years old so Lynda wanted nothing to do with that so she kicked her out. Peggy still came over to visit and she gave me fife hundred dollars, she bought Lynda a brand new washer and dryer and she even cleaned up the house for us. I don't know if she was trying to buy her way back into a good relationship with all of us, but he didn't hesitate to accept what she was offering. I ended up blowing i ton anew PlayStation 2 and like four games because i sold my PlayStation2 awhile ago.

My eighth grade year i went over and visited Phil after two years of not seeing him and he was happy to see me, i spent a weekend over there and we played Super Smash Bros Melee for the GameCube the whole weekend and Neopets. He asked how i was doing and i didn't mention South Wood to him because it was quite embarrassing. That summer i completed the seventh grade and went back to this placement called the Partial Program, it was downtown Pittsburgh and i was only there for a couple of weeks. I was only seeing Tim as a therapist because Lisa and John's time was up. Lisa and I kept in contact for a short time on the internet and Tim was getting tired of me going into placements. The partial program was like Western Psych but smaller and I only spent about two weeks in there and it was really boring.

I spent my eighth grade commuting from Lynda's to the partial program for school everyday and I received more therapy from a different company called Community Alternatives which is in South Side. Tom Obiecunas was requested to come back while going to school there and he was able to because I was no longer in a placement. Shortly after that i went back to Western Psych for my final time in April of 2004.

Being in there again was just a breeze, I was on the west wing and I re met Asa but he wasn't all Gothic he was just depressed. He was my room mate this time and I met this girl in there. Her name was Alson Gamble and she was from Steel Valley. I seen her wearing a Steel Valley hoodie and I told her that I went to that school district and she said that she remembered seeing me our sixth grade year. We talked about our problem sand she knew Casandra Dobnak and I was surprised about that and I told her about the whole preschool incident and she thought it was funny. Aly and I had a lot in common and i started to grow feelings for her. Every night we would sit next to each other while the movie was playing and just stare at each other. She gave me her number the day she left and i called her that night but i had to be quiet because your not allowed to call friends, just family.

That night this very beautiful Russian girl got placed there for treatment.Her name is Liliya Agafanova and from the moment I had my eyes on her I felt love at first sight. I wanted to be with her and marry her and have her black, white and Russian babies. I had feelings for Aly but Liliya was so beautiful but she didn't have those type of feelings for me and she is two years older than me. She was born July 22nd, 1988 but I didn't even care, i tried to get in her pants so bad but she was like a bomb shelter, nothing could penetrate that. The next day i left Western Psych and i called Aly and we talked for hours.

I had my first girlfriend and i only had one thing on my mind; sex. Alyson was very emotional and she got depressed over every little thing but I cared about her so much and just wanted to her to be happy and I was willing to do what ever it took. She wanted to meet me and hang out with me and introduce me to her parents so i sold my PlayStation 2 for60dollars down at some pawn shop and called a cab and had it drive me to the water front, it was twenty dollars. I walked a few streets up and called her on a pay phone and her mom and dad picked me up. Her mom Nancy is a very nice lady and she was doing the thing Lynda dreamed on doing; a nurse. By that point Lynda was very sick and her back gave out and is to crippled to work or even walk than eventually needed a wheel chair.

Aly's dad, Ray is a nice man but a strict father. Aly was in Western Psych because of her depression and how her dad was towards her. Aly has a sister named Lauren, she is about two years younger than Aly and she goes to Steel Valley as well. Aly wasn't that pretty but her personality was awesome and there was just something about her that i just liked.Aly and I didn't just have sex right off the bat, we just did oral sex and made out a lot at her house. I was afraid to bring her over Lynda's because of how Lynda is towards everyone and being in that wheel chair and not being able to do anything sure embarrassed me.But Aly insisted that she met Lynda so sadly i agreed to it. Aly took the bus over to Lynda's and thanks to her I got familiar with how the buses worked and didn't need to spend forty dollars to go there and back.

From the moment Lynda met Aly she didn't like her and said that she was going to hurt me and I didn't believe a word Lynda was saying because I just figured Lynda didn't want me to be happy because she's not happy.Lynda got really sick and needed to be hospitalized so I was put into a shelter in Carrick for a few weeks. That shelter was the first placement I went to that was actually for a reason other than anargument or something. Being there was pretty much the same as i was used to. Had to be in bed at a certain time, there was a small class room where I had to do work while I was there. There actually was a computer there but the internet was so slow.

Whenever Lynda got out of the hospital I was back at her house and Tom came by to see how I was and he didn't know that I had a girlfriend.Evelyn bought me a computer with her credit card and Lynda paid her back one hundred dollars a month till it got paid off, and Tom gave me a computer desk to put it on. I spent most of my hours on Neopets just playing than i got into this game called Gun bound. Gun bound is a turn based action game where you pick a mobile and on your turn you have to aim and charge your blast meter and the more you charge it the farther the shot willgo. You get gold for killing your opponent and you can rank up. This game was online so you played with other people and you use the gold to buy avatars. Avatars are the equipment you put on your character in Gunbound that gives you stat boosts to make your character stronger. Iwas so addicted to it.

Than i met this guy on the internet named Cory and he introduced me into game hacking and hack programming. He showed me some programs you can use ingames to hack and its an unfair advantage and helps you do things you couldn't do normally without hacking. We had aimbots for Gunbound so it would automatically tell you how much power to fill the meter at what specific angle to automatically hit. He also showed me a neopets item duplicator which was an exploit in neopets to dupe your items and that day is known to be Dupe Day. I made real money selling neopoints to people because of that hack program via paypal. Ever since then, all i ever wanted to do is hack people and games, than sell the stuff for real money. That next day my account got block and the exploit was fixed and me and my other internet friend Ben spent almost twelve hours trying tore make the generator but failed to do so. We tried so many methods, we even tried to use an X Box as a server but that fell through the roof.

We eventually quit Neopets after five years and i got Phil's account frozen but I didn't tell him it was me or he would flip out because he was working on that account for years. Gunbound we eventually quit and we found this game called Maplestory. Maplestory is a 2D side scrolling Multiply Massive Online Role Playing Game (MMORPG) where you make your character and you have to kill monsters to level up and you can pick one out of four jobs; the warrior, mage, thief, and bowman. You start off at level one and all of the jobs can be chosen at level ten except mage, which is level eight. Each time you level you get skill points and ability points and your experience increased by a lot.Basically once you hit level ten, depending on what you do you could be leveling for hours. From level twenty to thirty could take a week, and from thirty to forty about a month and so on and so forth. The company of Maple Story was Wizet and they did a great job with the game, it is so addicting and Ben found hacks for that and I was even more hooked.One hack was called Vac Hack, which sucked all the monsters into a specific spot so you can easily kill them without moving for faster experience.Another hack was God Mode, where you cannot be hit or lose damage from anything in the game. There was Tubi, which allowed you to pick up many items at once. And there was Item Vac, which allowed you to pick up items any where from the screen, very good for scamming people into dropping there items from far away.

I was so addicted to Maplestory i started seeing it every where, If i seen some body i didn't want to see in real life, i tried to warp or change servers in my brain just so they wouldn't be on the same planet as me. I also got into a game called Counter Strike, its basically an online first person shooter. And Half-Life 2, which is a single player first person shooter with an awesome physics engine. I was a complete gamer and i hated life unless it was in front of a monitor or TV. I just wanted to make a living hacking and selling because it seemed so full proof. I made some fake auctions up on eBay about selling Maple Story accounts and people sent me the money and i didn't send the many thing because eBay and paypal have no responsibility for virtual goods.

That next year i seen Peggy get hand cuffed out of Lynda's and thrown into jail. That is when things got really messed up but at the same time better. Ken came back and took my sisters to Washington and he took care of them. Lynda and I moved once again, to Duquesne right by Kennywood park and it was closer to Alyson and than I went into a placement called Family Links in Millvale. It was basically a shelter that they keep you held just until an opening was available at one of the actual group homes. I was getting so fed up with going in and out of placements i started to just not like Lynda at all.

Being in Millvale was okay although Aly didn't like that because we couldn't see each other. I met this girl named Kristin Machaj, she was really pretty and she believes in the Wicca religion and she practiced using Terra cards. I had a crush on her even though i was with Aly but i never really tried to pursue a relationship with her i did flirt with her though. She wasn't at Millvale she was in Shaler but she commuted from over there to the school. I met a lot of people at Millvale like some big black guy named Dontay, he reminded me of 50 Cent's son or something.

There was this cool staff member named Mr. Shawn, he always took me to the store and bought me candy and stuff and talked to me. I was the most well behaved person at Millvale, all the girls liked me because i would take there trays up for them when ever they were done eating and throw there milk cartons and other trash away. I was sharing a room with some weird kid and i just spent a lot of the time looking out of the window wishing that life were better and that Lynda wasn't sick and that I could just re live the past and never of moved from Munhall and I just wanted to be with Aly. I was also thinking about Liliya for some odd reason. I really liked Kristin but she randomly left Shaler and went back into the real world and was home free. I was really sadbe cause i didn't even get her number or anything to keep in touch. I spent Halloween in there and i wasn't to thrilled about that at all.

I didn't have Tom, or Tim in my life, all i had was me and Lynda, and of course Millvale. Few days after Halloween there was an available spot open in Lawrenceville so i packed up all my stuff and went straight from Millvale to Lawrenceville which is only about a seven minute drive, very close to down town. Lawrenceville wasn't that bad of a placement, i had a super visor named Teresha Zurku and the head supervisor was some weird guy named Tim. It was right next to the church brew works and the actual placement at one point was a church. It consisted of three floors but it was a house, on the bottom floor was some offices and the kitchen area. On the second floor was the living area, recreation area, staff office, computer area, and a bathroom, and on the top floor was all of the bed rooms and bathrooms.

I made a lot of friends from all over Pittsburgh in there although half of them were bad influences. I had a room mate, his name was Terrance and he was the Lawrenceville version of Nute, there was a bully named Walt,and this white guy named Jeff. I went to this school in Bloomfield called the AIU, and i had to go there for a few weeks just till my paperwork was done than i got enrolled into Schenley High School for ninth grade. Being in Schenley wasn't so bad considering my social skills were horrible because i was so used to people with a lot of problems and the mental level of a new born. I had to walk to school majority of the day and it takes about forty minutes to walk there, and about an hour in the winter because it is just so cold. I met this kid named Chiante at school and he lived right behind Family Links so every morning i would go over his house and walk to school and from school i would go back to Lawrenceville.

A lot of the times i would skip school just to hang out with him and his friends. There was a level system in Family Links and the higher level you were, the more money you get for your allowance and my go always to get to the highest level to get a better allowance and skipping school is a huge risk to your level but I did it anyway. Being in Lawrenceville for that long the saddest thing happened to me in my life. Aly tells me she has been cheating on me with some guy she met at work. She was fifteen at the time and he was thirty and when ever she told me that, I was so sad. Not because of his age, it was just the fact that I had so much feelings for her and I really did love her.Iwould do anything for her and she really did that to me. I just stayed in my room for the longest time and i eventually got over it because time heals your problems if you don't dwell on them.

I was ready to move on but my confidence was so low at the time and I considered myself to be the ugliest person on the face of the earth that I dint even try to find a girlfriend or anything. I remember being so sad that i stopped believing in God for the longest time and i was in Chiante's house and i stole his game boy out of his house and gave it to a friend to help him out. I also went down to the get-go gas station and stole a grandma cookie and didn't feel any sense of regret,I actually felt like I was evil. I was so depressed that I thought I was going to murder someone and not even care. I just kept on questioning God's existence because if God was real, why would he put me through this. The truth is, God didn't put me through that, I put myself through that because of the choices I made during that. God knew it was going to happen but I had free will and i seriously chose to take that game boy, i chose to steal the cookie, and I chose to be put into placement, I mean yeah Lynda did a bad job raising me but I was also a bad child as well.