A Merry Organized Christmas List

There are many many things to do leading up to Christmas. Because I am a very (this is what is called a first-person narrative, okay? So stop laughing or any gesture related to laughing or any sound related to starting to be related to laughing, right now. –silence—okay, back to story) very organized being (not obsessive-compulsive, mind you, O-R-G-A-N-I-Z-E-D, which is technically a good personality trait, ‘cept for the fact it is seriously lacking in me……narrative getting messed up here……starting over in next paragraph)

--much fanfare—
(NOTE: I am just copying and pasting, with all the extra opinion inserts cut out of course, what I wrote in the first paragraph)

There are many many things to do leading up to Christmas. Because I am a very very organized being (uncopy-pasted version starts here), I wrote down all these many important things to do on a list titled ‘Many Important Things To Do List’. Here is the authentic, untouched, unpublished, unedited, original draft.

1.          Write this list I have just written
2.          Write down the things on list first, because the tense I used in 1. is wrong.
3.          this is officially 1. ….1. Discuss what presents to give
4.                                            2. Decide on great code language to discuss presents
5.                                            3. Decide presents in code language
6.                                            4. Finish the presents
7.                                            5. Convince self to finish presents
8.                                            6. Really finish presents
9.                                            7. Set alarm clock on Christmas Eve
10.                                            8. When alarm clock rings, sleep for ten minutes more
11.                                            9.  Wake up at 1.00 p.m. and hide presents in full daylight
12.                                            10. Pretend innocence when everybody finishes lunch
13.                                            11. Finite
14.                                            12. Praise self
15.                                            13. Really finite

There, finished.

Now, here’s the plan. Lean closer.

It is already Christmas Eve, so we will skip all the things-to-do except the last two.

Capice?

Okay. Good night, great hardworking wonderful self.

(in very elegant flowing voice with nice lilt) Finite! (thunderbolt or three) Farewell.