Masks & Makeup

The makeup that I wear keeps you out, it keeps me in
Heaven forbid that you see the real me, for you would not like me
I wear my bravado like a badge of courage to keep you at bay
I hide my fears, lest they allow you to devour or destroy me

The makeup that you wear serves a like purpose
The never ending battle to play social hide and seek
I dare not give you a hint of who I really am, you will not understand
My fragility, my own sense of self does not work in this world

The masks that we wear, layered one on top of the other
Lest one slip off and we are discovered for whom we really are
Another underneath protects me from you and you from me
Stripped down naked is not all that appealing a thought for me

My psyche devoid of the real truth of who and what I am
Me a man, capable of great love and murder all in one package
Builder of great things, destroyer of lives when the mood strikes me
Tender to a fault, compassionate to a degree, always hiding

Full of fear that you may find me out and hate what you see
Try as I do, I cannot remove all of the masks and makeup
They regenerate themselves like a scab on a wound, covering it up
A self-protective device that happens without thought or effort


Why can't I show you the real and true me and vice-versa
How does this fear manifest itself and hold such power over me?
I know not, I know that it does and will continue to do so
Despite my best efforts to subdue and overcome it

Years of reading, counseling and professional help have hardly dented it
The makeup of the mask is hard as the surface of an occluded diamond
Impervious to all attempts to diminish it, peer into it or wear it down
I know what I am but you cannot, for you would not fully understand

As we might surmise, we are not that much different under the facade
Our behaviors both good and despicable are not unique to oneself
We don't share them lest embarrassment overcome each of us
Shame is a powerful thing that we each fear, guilt its sibling

The rules of life and society deter us from showing who we really are
My innermost thoughts have the capacity to have me committed, I dare not share those
Confinement and psychotropic medication have little appeal, electroshock a no-no
Temporary answers to lifelong questions and conditions, the mask will regenerate