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Rated: · Script/Play · Other · #1437655
Soon to be in production Movie Short - Funhouse Pictures
INT. RESTAURANT - AFTERNOON

The busy restaurant is where our scene takes place. The walls are adorned with bright, NEON SIGNS, beer company marketing SIGNS and NASCAR driver cardboard CUT OUTS. Two ARCADE GAMES are in the corner with TWO PATRONS intently involved in gaming.

FIVE WOMEN and SIX MEN sit at TWO long, picnic style TABLES. They are having a good time talking, laughing and taking pictures. The group at one tale is well dressed and groomed while the group at the other table is garbed in shabby apparel and unmanned, uncombed hair.

One of the men at the well groomed table taps the side of his pint glass with a knife. He stands up and appears to be speaking to the people at his table.

MATT
(standing)
I just wanted to say how happy I am
that you all could make it out here this
weekend. I know how hard it is for all
of you to get away so I just want to
say thank you, Angela and I have really
enjoyed having you.

Matt looks down at ANGELA, sitting to his right.

One of the men at the other table spits a chewing tobacco spit into an empty beer bottle.

JOHN
Not as much as I woulda enjoyed havin’
Angela.

A PREGNANT WOMAN sitting next to him, slaps John lightly on the shoulder. An older woman sitting at the table across from John rolls her eyes and shakes her head in disapproval.

SUE
Now, John you let that boy talk and cut
it with your antics.

JOHN
Come on mama, I’m just havin’ some fun
with the old son of a bitch.



SUE
If he’s a son of a bitch, then so are you.
Both of ya passed through me and at least
he didn’t fight comin’ out.

MATT
Mom, please.

SUE
I like to thought that John’s big head tore
me from one end to the other.

MATT
(embarrassed)
Mother, please.

Matt’s face is becoming red as he motions towards the others at the table.

MATT (CONT’D)
Angela, our friends.

SUE
The doctor had to use that grabber
to finally get him out.

MATT
Mom, are you kidding me right now?

Angela stands.

ANGELA
Sue, it was so nice to get a chance to
see you this weekend. I’m just sorry
that you can’t stay longer.

SUE
Angie, we really liked seeing you too.
It would be nice to stay here in the city,
but we have to get back to the mountains.
Those dead animals aren’t gonna stuff
themselves. But we do have a surprise for
you before we go.

MATT
(hesitant)
Surprise, what surprise?

Sue takes a small, black BOX out of her purse and throws it to Matt.

SUE
I found this and I think it’s only right
that you do it with your family around.

John, taking a gulp from his BEER, recognizes another situation in which to embarrass his brother.

JOHN
Yeah, let us see you do it.

The pregnant woman, now holding a TODDLER in her arms, slaps John on the shoulder.

MATT
Where did you find this?

SUE
Big head found it at your house.

MATT
John, what were you doing going
through my night stand?

JOHN
Well, me and the Mrs got a little adventurous
the other night and I know you told me
you keep some of those...

ANGELA
(interrupting)
Ah, Matt, what’s in the box?

JOHN
Yeah, Matt, what’s in her box?

The pregnant woman now holding the toddler and an OLDER CHILD, tries to slap John, but can’t. Angela’s attitude drops and she looks irritated.

SUE
Matt, you gonna do it or what?

Feeling like he has no other choice, Matt steps back from the table and gets on one knee.


MATT
I wanted to do this next week in Jamaica,
but I don’t think I have a choice here.
Angela, from the first moment I saw you...

JOHN
(interrupting)
Naked.

MATT
(irritated)
From the first time I saw you, I knew you
were going to be the one I wanted to lead
my life with. You have stood beside me for
so long and now I want you to stand beside
me forever.

JOHN
Matt, have you ever stood behind her.
(loudly)
Whew-wee!

ANGELA
(angrily)
John, shut up!

MATT
Angela, will you marry me?

Angela, clearly in shock, reaches for her words.

ANGELA
This has got to be the most inappropriate,
embarrassing proposal of all time. The fact
that I have put up with your backwoods,
redneck family all weekend without completely
loosing it, is a miracle.

To John.

ANGELA (CONT’D)
You, with your off-color remarks. I will never
have sex with you, so get over it.

To the pregnant woman.

ANGELA (CONT’D)
You. Do you do anything else besides sit
quietly and have that pig’s children? What
are you...a robot?

To Sue.

ANGELA (CONT’D)
And you. You are the worst one of all with
your disgusting roadkill stories. Read a book,
please, learn something...anything.

To Matt.

ANGELA (CONT’D)
(calm)
Now that I’ve gotten all that off my chest, I can
think of nothing I would want to do more than
to leave you here with these rednecks. But, as
long as you promise that I’ll only have to see them,
at the most, once a year...

MATT
Absolutely.

ANGELA
Then yes, I will marry you.

The friends and family members at both tables CLAP their hands and CHEER. Matt puts the ring on Angela’s finger and they passionately kiss.

SUE
Welcome to the family, both of you. And Matt,
don’t worry, I raised Angie to be a great wife.

A couple RESTAURANT WORKERS approach and lazily begin CLAPPING their hands.

WORKERS
(singing)
Happy, happy birthday, I hope your day’s
real neat. Happy, happy birthday, we sing
this song with glee.

ROLL END CREDITS.
© Copyright 2008 Abigail Gilmor (amgilmor at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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