A short, humorous interview between Christine Skye and Fox, Slippy, Krystal, and Panther. |
Cristy Skye: Hello. This is Christine Skye and I'm conducting an interview with the leader of the Star Fox team, Fox McCloud! Say hello Fox! Fox McCloud: Umm, hi... Why am I doing this again? Cristy: Because, we're paying you good money! Fox: Oh yeah, that's it... *starts counting the hundreds in his hand* Cristy: *sighs* Anyways, we're all aware that you have broken up with Krystal lately. Fox: *had been drinking a glass of water but spits it out all over Cristy* WHAT?!?! WHO TOLD YOU THAT! Cristy: *pulls out a towel and wipes her face off* Maybe that mediocre game, Star Fox Command... And plus, I talked to Krystal a couple of days ago. *points at the scar on her cheek* Never tell her she doesn't look good in purple... Fox: Ouch, I would know how you feel. In fact, I wasn't the one who broke up with her; she broke up with me. Said I didn't show enough emotion when we would kiss... Cristy: Well, it makes sense... You have less emotion than Ben Stein... Fox: I do not! *he says in a monotone voice* Cristy: See? Monotone voice; unemotionality. They run hand in hand... *Fox runs off the stage crying.* Cristy: Well, there's a reason we decided to call in Slippy for back up. Slippy Toad: *gets pushed out of a closet in the back of the stage and pushed up to the front of the stage* Hey! What did I do? Cristy: It's what you didn't do... Slippy: ??? Cristy: *clears her throat* Anyways, we have you here to talk about your new book. *holds up a copy of Slippy's new book There and Back Again: A Plastic Surgery Tale by Slippy Toad* Slippy: WHAT?! How did you get that?! I don't have it out in stores yet! Cristy: Yes, we know. We had Fox get this copy from your Arwing... Slippy: Well, fine... It will be available on Amazon tomorrow... Cristy: There we go... *pats Slippy's back* Now anyway, tell us about your new book. It has a very... interesting subject matter, involving... *censoring noises are heard, blocking out Cristy's voice* Slippy: Please, don't go into detail... That's what the book's for. And yes, I had plastic surgery changing my voice and... *censoring noises are heard* ...from... *more censoring noises are heard as this is a G-Rated talk show* ...to... *censoring noises are heard again, as the rating people are considering changing it to a M-Rated show to bypass the censors* and then it was changed back again. Cristy: So, what gender are you really?... Slippy: *leans over and whispers in her ear* Cristy: WHAT?! *runs off the stage, looking for a bathroom* Hawk Nevarine: *runs up onto the stage in front of the camera* COMMERCIAL BREAK! *There is a short commercial break for the show's sponsors: Cornerian Pub and Grill, Titania Beach Accessories, and Andross' Evil Megalomaniacs Anonymous* Cristy Skye: Hello! Welcome back! We are now here with Krystal... Krystal... *looks carefully at her paper* There's a smudge on her last name... Anyways, how are you Krystal? Krystal (Smudge): Well, I'm doing much better now that I'm away from that idiotic Fox... Cristy: Oh come on, he can't be that bad... *camera cuts to a scene in the back stage area* Fox: *is standing on a table with his shirt off singing* PLAY THAT FUNKY MUSIC, WHITE BOY! Cristy: On second thought... Krystal: *rolls her eyes* You should see him with Clay Aiken. Cristy: ... Anyway, we've heard that you have been dating Panther now, is this true? Krystal: Yes, it is true. Come here my little Panther-Poo! *Panther runs out onto the stage and Krystal stands up and jumps into his arms* Cristy: Oh brother... Panther Caruso: Hello, my darling Krystal. My azure ocean wave, my beloved baby pie, my... *Fox runs out onto the stage jumping on Panther* Fox: She's mine I tell you! Mine! *he says as he punches Panther again and again* Panther: No! Not my beautiful face! *he says, trying to dodge Fox's punches, but failing badly* Krystal: No! Not my Panther-Poo's beautiful face! *she says, trying to hurt Fox, but failing badly* Cristy: *sighs* I give up... *throws down her microphone on the stage and walks off* Fox: *notices that Cristy has walked off and stands up in the middle of the stage and starts singing* Why can't we be friends, why can't we be friends... *Panther and Krystal walk up to him, putting their arms behind his back, standing to his sides, breaking out into chorus with him* WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS, WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS! *Slippy and Peppy randomly walk out and start singing with them* Mark Hamill: *walks on stage* NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! *walks over to the rest of them and starts singing with them* The End, or is it? |