a look at america

a look at america

he knocked upon the door
eyes filled with fear
  that comes from a sense
                   of intrusion
with fumbling words
  how to ask
                 while expecting
                   more rejection

other churches
  doors had been opened
                   then closed
                             securely
nothing they could do
                   beyond them
‘sorry,
            God bless,
                   good-bye’
                   (translation)
‘just leave us
         you are not one of us’

self pride
  a sense of dignity
beaten down          flat
into shame
         shame
                   of having to ask
                             of having to beg
for a place to sleep
         for a bite of food
not for himself
         but for those
                   he accepted responsibility

a wife          scared
with silent eyes
         expectations
                   of still more rejection
from compassionate
         caring
                   america

a third who stayed outside
hesitant, fearful
         of even exiting the van
slow, unsure of himself
protected by excited dog
he was slow
         not all there
part of him had been lost
         left on a battlefield
                   in some foreign land
for reasons still unclear

the promise of a job
now reneged upon
         for reasons known –
moved overseas
         more efficient
                   less costly
         (translation)
lower wages
         less restrictions
                   more profits
         for those who have already
                   more than enough

they were going home
                   or what was left of it
somewhere in kansas
                   near eastern border


and i
         i stand there silent
well fed
         in my tailored suit
in my prosperity
         in my own shame
                   of disbelief

we gave them leftovers
         from our blessed pot fellowship
really                    nothing much
         to us the uneaten excess
to them          much more
         more than a pot of gold
                   at end of a fading rainbow
an answer to a prayer
         we could not understand
                   here in america

we stared in disbelief
how could this be
         hunger in a land of plenty
the nameless
         the faceless
                   the silent
         the ignored
                   and the denied
we had met them face to face
         and it was ugly
                   this truth revealed          

he deferred to her
         letting her eat
                   what was offered
a diabetic
         in pain of need
something for the one
         who hid outside
                   within himself
would we be offended
         if
                     if he just
                                          gave a portion
                                       to the dog?
he would feed all
         before a bite for himself
nobility in clothes
                   not much more than rags

she told us her name
         and asked of ours
said with a respect
         to each addressed
                   with word of thanks
moved by humility
         and something more
we were strangers
         but now
                   to hear our names
it became more
         it had become –
                   personal

in parking lot outside
alone          with my thoughts
i prayed          
         a prayer of thanks
but for the grace of God
         there go i
how i had been blessed
         beyond what i knew
                   or even thought about
pride and arrogance
                   put in its place

america
         land of the free
                   home of the brave
the ‘american dream’
heard it all before
         even believed it
                   unquestioning
                             blindly
i still believe it
         though not the same
                   a new perspective
i had looked into the shadows
         beyond the words
                   what was hidden
                             denied

i had come          face to face
         with a look
                       at america
the dark secrets
                   it holds within
greed
          emptiness
                                 denial
                                         and shame