Be All You Can Be

To: President George W. Bush and advisors;
You are, or are counseled, by a seemingly avid follower of Machiavellian tactics. I myself am a true believer in the genius laid down in Niccolo Machiavelli's The Prince. I applaud you first on having the audacity to lie with impunity to other world leaders, and the American people, in order to attain your goal of invading Iraq. "Those princes who have done great things have held good faith of little account, and have known how to circumvent the intellect of men by craft, and in the end have overcome those who have relied on their word." [Machiavelli 60] Colin Powell's testimony to the United Nations claiming that Iraq had stockpiles of WMD, including biological and chemical weapons, banned missiles, and an active nuclear weapons program along with your 2003 State of the Union Address saying the same was tactically irreproachable. Once we got the go-ahead from Congress to go to war, you knew actual proof would be helpful, but unnecessary. You also knew from careful reading that to keep control of Iraq and all its spoils, you would not only have to get rid of Saddam Hussein, but also his family. "...and if the ruler wants to keep hold of his new possessions, the family of their former lord must be extinguished." [Machiavelli 9] On July 22, 2003, Saddam's sons Uday and Qusay were killed in Mosul, which was followed by the capture of Saddam in Tikrit on December 13, 2003; and we all rejoiced in showing Saddam some American hospitality fitting for a former foreign dictator.
Machiavelli stresses the importance of having strong forces and arms, and wisely you have thrown caution to the wind when it comes to funding military endeavors, although some projects chosen for funding were somewhat lacking in integrity. The accomplishment I am most proud of, is the way you have used fear and distraction to occupy the people, while you and your brethren pursue your real agenda without interference. "Men are less hesitant about injuring someone who makes himself loved than one who makes himself feared, because love is held together by a chain of obligation that, since men are a wretched lot, is broken on every occasion for their own self-interest; but fear is sustained by a dread of punishment that will never abandon you." [Machiavelli 58] "[Ferdinand] kept the minds of the barons of Castile occupied with this, so that, concentrating on that war, they did not consider rebellion. In this way he acquired reputation and dominion over them without their noticing it." [Machiavelli 76] What better distraction and divider of the people than a protracted battle over gay marriage? Bringing the abortion issue to the front pages again also helped. Instilling enough fear in the American people to get the PATRIOT Act passed was the real Shock and Awe campaign, in my opinion, and keeping them fearful with continuous media coverage of non-existent threats, and an ever changing, color-coded, Homeland Security Terrorist Threat Level, was inspiring. The most ingenious use of fear I've ever seen, however, is how you've made the rest of the world fear you, a fear of your supposed incompetence, idiocy, and possible lack of sanity. I know, in reality, your "Bushisms," as the cynical press calls your idiomatic mishaps, are really a cunning ploy to make us all underestimate your powerful intellect.
"Therefore, a prince must be careful never to let anything fall from his lips that is not imbued with the five qualities mentioned above; to those seeing and hearing him, he should appear to be all mercy, all faithfulness, all integrity, all humanity, and all religion. And there is nothing more necessary than to possess this last quality." [Machiavelli 62] Don't think I didn't notice the incorporation of your religion into every aspect of your politics. This os what won you the support of nost of the American people!
Now that you understand I am on your side, there is the issue of your being dubbed a Mayberry Machiavelli. Wikipedia describes this as, "The phrase meant to invoke infamous Machiavellian style power politics coupled with a prejudicial sense of regional backwardness and incompetence in the American south as supposedly exemplified by the fictional, small, rural, North Carolina town of Mayberry R.F.D., from the Andy Griffith Show." In my opinion, this signifies that if these unpatriotic detractors are on to the fact that you are using Machaivellian tactics, then you have not been using them effectually enough.
Remember you reading, "Hence it should be noted that, in conquering a state, its conqueror should weigh all the injurious things he must do and commit them all at once, so as not to have to repeat them every day. By not repeating them, he will be able to make men feel secure and win them over with the benefits he bestows upon them." [Machiavelli34] "Anyone who becomes master of a city accustomed to living in liberty and does not destroy it may expect to be destroyed by it, because such a city always has as a refuge in any rebellion the name of liberty and its ancient institutions, neither of which is ever orgotten either because of the passing of time or because of the bestowal of benefits." [Machiavelli 19] In the Iraq situation, it is clear that the initial plan hasn't worked, and what is going on is the repetition of injurious things every day. It is time to recognize failure in this matter and pull our troops out of Iraq, as their presence there is too costly financially, and diplomatically. This war has been successful in destracting the people and getting Saddam out of the way, but, realistically it is producing more terrorists every day, bankrupting the country, while depleting the country of able-bodied young men and women; and, worst of all, it is causing the people to despise and hate you. "One of the most powerful remedies a prince has against conspiracies is not to be hated by the people, for whoever plans a conspiracy always believes that he will satisfy the people by killing the prince." [MAchiavelli 63] Even if the people despised and hated you, you would be fine as long as you had the support of the military. Unfortunately, you are alienating yourself from the military, by redeploying them again and again. They see no end in sight, and none is even promised. Machiavelli would tell you to at least pretend you have an exit strategy, and such tactics have served you well in the past. They are also angry that they have neither adequate training, nor enough armor on their vehicles. Our soldiers should not have to dig up scrap metal to protect their vehicles because they lack properly armored ones. Furthermore, when they do become injured, they come home and cannot get the treatment they need, or are forced to live in run-down buildings and jotels that are rat and cockroach infested. Wounded men and women should not be billed for their disintegrated clothing when they have been bombed or shot. They should be given replacement clothing and be treated like human beings, not fodder. When soldiers are going AWOL, it is not a good time to start a draft, but if you must continue this farce in Iraq then you had better think about starting a draft.
"Mercenaries and auziliaries are useless and dangerous." "Mercenary captains are either excellent men or they are not. If they are, you cannot trust them, since they will always aspire to their own greatness, either by oppressing you, who are their masters, or by oppressing others against your intent; but if the captain is without ability, he usually ruins you." [Machiavelli 43] Almost half of the forces that are in Iraq are mercenary forces, and they cause problems for our military while they are there. They are subject to no rules, hence they sometimes shoot at our own military personnel. They are mostly foreigners, who do not, nor have they ever lived in the United States, and they have no reason to stay on our side other than their paychecks. These paychecks are much higher than those of the United States military forces, and these mercenaries are often much better provided for, with fully armored vehicles, state of the art weapons, the best training, and even helicopters. this also exacerbates hostility from our forces.
When you have twelve former captains publicly declaring they are against the war, the general hatred of the people, soldiers going AWOL and broadcasting via internet the shame and disgrace they feel at having to kill innocent civilians to protect Halliburton oil interests, it must be time to reread your pocket Machiavelli. Thank you for your time, and I look forward to the subtle but sweeping changes I feel confident this letter will inspire.
Your Secret Admirer