Friends*

When you said you wanted to
Be my friend*,
I was so happy.
How could I have been so careless
Not to have seen the
Asterisk,
The one that lead to the
Fine print right below all of your
Promises.

"I promise to be there for you,
To be someone you can talk to.
I promise you can come to me
When you've got a problem and
Need to share.
I promise to laugh with you,
Cry with you,
Never lie to you.
I promise
To always be your
Friend*."

*Not obligated to actually care.
May or may not listen to all of what
You have to say.
The trustworthiness depicted here
Is actually a dramatization,
An exaggeration of the true me.
Please do not actually place any
Trust in me.
Fully capable of taking advantage of
Our friendship.
Prone to lying.
No money-back guarantee.