Darkness

So far away from where I always wanted to be.
Why have I let this happen again?
I knew it would end like this.
Crying all alone,
on the unforgiving ground.
Too weak and afraid to rise,
and face the world anymore.
Far from the only one who loves me completley.
Frightened of the things that cannot hurt me.
But I am more than I seem to be.
I will cry, and lay here.
But in that one moment,
when the tears of others sound like bells.
I will rise despite my fear.
Because I am more than I seem.
A mother without a child.
A doctor without a degree.
A sister without a sibbling.
The one who will show others the way to their light.
But please, do not ask me to follow.

For I cannot see that beauty.
they know where they belong, beside somone great.
And I know where I belong.
Alone in the dark,
with nothing but my own faint heart beat,
keeping me company.

Every once in a while, I hear desperate pleas.
Crying out, piercing my world
And I am happy for a short while.
As one more soul is lead to the light,
into the light that I am forbidden to touch.
I wonder if one of these days,
somone will hear my cries.
And help me to find my own light.
I highly doubt it.
But for the sake of he who loves me.
I must keep my hope going.
Must continue my search for answers.
But first,
I've got to figure out how to pull myself up off of this floor.
To wipe away the tears.
Find the strength I used to harbor.
And take on the darkness one more time.