untitled 1

Hatred, such a strong horrid word
Filled with anger and disgust
A description of how I feel

A young bright man, its often been told
Charming personality, a little shy, never bold
Good company to be in, loving and bright
Just lacking in confidence, still he's alright

Always nice to hear
Or so you would think
So why can't I accept it?

Punishment always, destruction I've reigned
Upon my mind, body and soul
Keep pilling on the pain
Alcohol and drugs, tools of the trade
Keep everyone at distance, keep in the tirade
I must surely deserve it, everyone I've let in
Has loved me then hated me, my hearts now wafer thin

Tired now must bring it all to an end
An end to the ants that are tunneling in my head
The washing machine thats my brain is constantly tumbling
Reversing white to black

The overdoses are not working,just leaving me feeling ill
Constantly crying inside, here I am still
A moment of desperation, I reach for the blade
So hard to cut, I just want everything to fade
Sharpness of pain, the evil ebbs out
There will finally be an end to this most horrific of bouts

An angel arrives or is it a devil
Stopping my plight, in hysterical care
So its up to the hospital, getting the care that I need
Treatment what not for addiction, depression
Rebuild the life that was almost so precious and lost