Love Bottled Up

Love Bottled Up
My name is David Yeserman and this is my story. I am an only child and grew up with nothing but boy cousins. For awhile, I have been bi-sexual. Just recently, I realized that boys peak my interest more than girls. In school, my peers ignore me because I am considered a “fag.” I have no friends or acquaintances. I like school even though I have no friends. School gets me away from the stress of everyday life. I am a good student and I get good grades. My teachers admire me and say I am a role model. My dream one day is to become a psychiatrist. My dad is a probation officer and my mom is a teacher.

It was an ordinary day for me being ignored and all, until I noticed a new face in the crowd. A boy about my age had just moved in to town. For a few weeks, I watched as the other kids would tease and taunt him. I felt bad so I felt that I had to intervene. I couldn’t stand around and allow this to continue! I knew how it felt to be teased and taunted because it used to happen to me everyday. It doesn’t happen so much now but I still do get the occasional sneers and snickers. If I happened to answer a question right in class I would get teased instead of praised. I would get pushed around in grade school and bullied by kids bigger then me. I would explain to my parents but there wasn’t much they could do except talk to the school authorities.

One day at lunch, I saw him sitting there alone. Well, I thought, to myself it’s now or never! I walked over and asked him, “Is anyone sitting here?” He looked up and said, “No, feel free.”
I copped a squat and he said, “Hi! My name is Anthony. I’m new and it’s not really going as well as expected.”
“Well, Dave’s here to save the day.” I was really perplexed by this boy. I really thought this guy and I could be “friends.”

After talking for about 15 minutes I couldn’t help but invite him to my house.

“Hey, I was wondering if you would like to come kick back at my house tonight?” I asked him. He looked at me and I guess he realized that I was sincere with my invitation because in the next minute or two he said, “Yeah! Sure. Why not?” with a huge smile. But I felt I had to let him know of my sexual preference before he officially agreed to come to my house. “Hey,” I said nervously, “Um..I..my.” Man, why was I stuttering all of the sudden? Was I ashamed?
He looked at me curiously, “What’s up? Is something wrong?”
“Nah, I just wanted to say that I am into guys instead of girls. I just wanted to let you know. I understand if you don’t want to come over, it’s cool.
Anthony interrupted and said, “Are you gay?”
I slowly nodded my head.
He said, “So am I. Why do you think the kids here started teasing me on my first day? This girl asked me did I have a girlfriend. I said that I was gay and I wasn’t into girls. She got mad and started telling people that I was gay. That incident ruined any thought of me having a reputation. I started staying to myself and that’s when people started calling me a “fag.” So it’s cool. I’m really glad we could be friends. I’m glad I’m not the only one that has a different sexual preference. I was kind of feeling lonely. I’m glad I have some one to talk to and that shares my interest.”

With that solved, we walked out of the cafeteria with huge smiles and many secrets. A few people grimaced at our happiness but they didn’t know what we knew. The rest of the day was spectacular.

After school, we met and walked the four blocks to my house with no conversation.
Once we got inside I looked at Anthony’s face. “Wow, he breathed, this is awesome.”
My house was something like a mansion. When you walk in you see a wrap around staircase and walls filled with various pieces of art. My mother loves to bring home different pieces of art on her vacations around the country. That was just the downstairs.
I snapped Anthony out of his trance. “Come on, man!” I said. He followed me up the stairs and into my room. He gawked because I had every possible electronic a teenager could want. Spoiled? No. Lucky? Yes.

We spent hours in my room playing video games, fooling around, and basically being boys. At the end of the night we had established a definite relationship. We exchanged numbers and hugged each other goodnight. I went to bed feeling confident that I finally had a new friend. Some one who actually understood how I felt.

The next two months went by with little argument between Anthony and I. His favorite place was the beach.

One day Anthony wrote me a poem called, “Your Love is like Clear Blue Water.” This is how it went:
Your love is like clear blue water
Just like the water
Your love soothes me
When you wrap you arms around me
It reminds me of a wave
Holding on and not letting it go
Strong with definition
Purpose and presence
Your love is like clear blue water.

Two weeks later after he gave this poem to me, Anthony was admitted to the hospital. He was diagnosed with pneumonia and his body couldn’t fight any longer because of his recent battles with sickness. I spent every minute with him that I possibly could. We finally met each other's parents. I was waiting for the day I met his parents but I never imagined it would be under these circumstances. Before he died, we had a long talk and I realized I loved him a lot. He had one last wish and he chose me to fulfill it. The wish was “Make a copy of the poem, go to my favorite place, take a bottle and release the poem into the sea.” I knew why he wanted me to do this. We had talked about this. He didn’t want to leave his favorite place without a memory. He needed a lifetime connection to the only that cleanses him.