Anticipation

There is something so exciting about anticipation.
The little twirl of hope, the strong anxiety of what might be!
The infrequent alarm bells preparing you for the worst
The louder heart beats, that say what the hell!

Sometimes I wish it would all be over
And I knew for sure what is next
Get it over with.
Sometimes I wish this could go on forever
Because nothing could possibly be as good
As hope makes it now!

I smile stupidly at what I think might be
I wish desperately for a fantasy come true
I imagine the possibilities, and act out the prospects
I focus disturbed and distracted on the everyday things
I plan for what might happen
I pray for a miracle, a special treat.

Would it really change my life if this chance passes by?
Would it matter if I went back to yesterday, and then straight on to the day after?
Perhaps not.
Perhaps this is just another false alarm of that elusive promise!

But I am glad for this whiff of an opportunity.
Happy for what it does for me today
Safe in how the scenes I imagine turn out.
Excited for the way it charges me,
And makes me wish for good things for myself.

If we could write our own stories,
They would be beautiful and happy!