An Attempt to Breathe

I sense sweat
In the smoky air.
Is this why I can't breathe?
Tonight is steamy thick
And inhaling is like
Swallowing syrup.

Dish me an excuse,
Pass a glass of scapegoat.
Will you please take the blame
For my respiratory defection?

My streaming eyes see
Smirks and heavy glasses,
Checkered tablecloths.

My straining ears hear
Bawdy laughter
And a steady rhythm,
Unlike my struggling lungs.

My nose, pinched and small,
Fights to smell tobacco
From sweet cigars and
The delicacy of sinful sherry.

My trembling fingertips
Grasp so tightly
On his steady shoulder,
Cotton cloth.
He'll catch me when
I stop trying.

My undulating tongue
Held captive behind
Clenched teeth,
Swells without
Moisture,

My lips,
Dry and bleeding
Are volcanic craters
Breaking under pressure but,
I'm too busy to notice,
Too busy trying.

I look around and
Suffocate, cramp,
Shrink.
I see the heat,
Rippling through the air,
Taste the heat,
Filtered between my teeth,
Smell the heat,
Through nostrils flared,
Hear the heat,
In waves like sound,

Feel this heat,
No.
My skin is numb,
For I am too busy trying.

Blue is my blood,
No oxygen.
Blue are my lips,
No oxygen.

I forgot to cough
yet it is futile to try.
This is my attempt
And I can't breathe.